DD – Chapter 47 Dorsen’s Reflection

My name is Dorsen Katabelia. I am the son of Druna Katabelia, the current Knight Captain. Since I was young, my father gave me lessons on martial arts. He told me that since I’d be protecting the royal family some day I’d need it. I took pride in those words. Whenever we began lessons, I worked as hard as I could. I was so committed to my martial arts studies that when I had to join the academy, I saw it more as a bother than a beneficial experience. I’d have rather stayed home and studied under the active-duty knights than go to school and learn. But since I was to be the heir, I had no choice but to go.

Since I was rather quiet to begin with, I had a great deal of trouble blending in. I often thought that it was useless to go to the academy after all. Then one day, I met a rather peculiar girl. She introduced herself as Yuri Noir, the daughter of Baron Noir. I met her while I was practicing alone at the training grounds. Since not many people use the training grounds at the academy, I found myself coming here every day to raise my skills.

“Impressive-”

That was the first thing she said to me.

“…What is?”

“Ah, my apologies. I come here almost every day, and see you come here every day. I always wondered what you were doing.”

“The back of the building?”

If I remember correctly, the back of the building has a flower field. But since no one ever goes there there should be a lot of weeds.

“Yes. The flower field. Since its no one uses it, I figured I’d grow some flowers. Of course, I’ve gotten permission from the academy, though.”

“Don’t look so surprised. I won’t go reporting to the school anyways.”

“Ah… I hadn’t thought about that possibility. No, that’s not what I intended. I meant that it’s pretty weird for a lady to be messing around in the dirt right? That’s why I’d be happy if you didn’t spread that around too much”

“It’s not like you’re being a nuisance to others right? I won’t say anything about it.”

“That’s great. And so what are you doing everyday?”

“Can’t you tell?”

“I can see that you’re training…but I can’t see for what reason. Considering that you’re already taking a Military Martial Arts class, it’s weird.”

Military Martial Arts is considered an elective class, and a lot of people with an affiliation to the Order take it. If not, it could be people who want to learn self-defense, or sons who have no chance of inheritance and therefore need to join the Order.

“I’m not training to supplement my classes.”

“Is that so?”

“Yes. As a matter of fact, I’ve been training so I can offer my services to the royalty.”

The girl, who had been blank-faced before, giggled.

“That’s a lovely ideal. If I was protected by someone with such strong ideals, I would have no worries.”

I’d remember that smile and laugh for a while.. After that occurrence, she began to sometimes drop in and watch me practice. Since I’d be training, our conversations were rather frank. At first I ignored her presence, but after a while I began to look forward to the time she’d appear. She commonly praised what I thought was the norm, and said that it was amazing or impressive. Those very words became my motivation and my training eventually picked up pace. I also began to think that my sword was not only for the royal family’s but that it would also be for her.

By the time I realized I fell for her, she had become engaged to the Edward, the second prince. I felt dejected at first, but I still felt that I needed to protect her. I kept these feelings, and eventually contradictions between my belief and fate began to appear. When I noticed these changes, I calmed down a bit and pledged that I’d protect her to the best of my ability.

So when Prince Edward and Lady Yuri were pitted against Duke Armelia’s daughter, I sided with Lady Yuri. After we successfully exiled Lady Iris, I felt as if I had successfully protected Lady Yuri.

“How could you have done such a thing!”

I had been called out by father. As I was wondering what he was talking about, Father sighed heavily.

“I’m talking about the case with Duke Armelia’s daughter!”

“…I can’t understand what I have done to deserve being yelled at so much.”

“Is that your real response?”

“Yes.”

“It is impossible for us to even raise our hands against dukes, but it should be more impossible to raise a hand against a woman. Are you no longer taking the Knight’s Code to heart?”

“So? Duke Armelia’s daughter was teasing Lady Yuri.”

“Did you see her tease Yuri?”

“N-No I did not… But to call it a groundless rumour…”

“Did you witness that exact scene? Did you happen to hear it happening?”

“N-no…”

“You disgust me! You had no evidence whatsoever but you proceeded to raise your hand against a woman. Even more so since it was against the second prince’s fiance. You’re a disgrace to the knights. You have sullied our household, and furthermore you have sullied the honor of a knight.”

“But I was…”

“I’m not listening to your excuses. Go cool your head off in penitence!”

I, who couldn’t say anything in response, was led by a butler to a locked room. After that I took some time off of school in repentance. I was forbidden from training, and I spent my days idling in my room.

I couldn’t understand why I was treated this way. I had just wanted to protect her. But my father’s “You have sullied the Knight’s Code” kept spinning through my thoughts.

While I was pondering, I was called out by my mother.

“It has been a long time, Dorsen.”

I recalled that it had been a long time since I last had a discussion with mother. As of late, I had spent even my weekends at the Academy, but since my house arrest I had stayed in my room.

“It has been a while.”

In front of me was a can of tea and a mountain of never before seen brown teacakes.

“That’s called chocolate. It has gotten rather popular in the capital as of late. Have a taste.”

On mother’s recommendation, I put one in my mouth. It was delicious. It was sweet and a bit bitter, a really sophisticated taste.

“A conglomerate run by the Armelia Household began selling it.”

“The Armelia Household…”

“Rumor has it Iris was the one who invented it.”

Mother frowned as she murmured Lady Iris’ name.

“Hey, Dorsen. Can you truly say you did the right thing?”

“The right thing?”

“Yes. To be honest, what you did was a really big problem given our house’s standing, but putting that aside, do you really think you did the right thing?”

I couldn’t understand Mother’s true motive. I thought I did the right thing. While I was under house arrest, I reconsidered Father’s words. Father probably wanted me to realize that as a future representative of the Katabelia House, I had to consider my social standings first and foremost. If it’s like that, I have no reason to be ashamed of my actions. If I was able to protect her, my family didn’t matter.

“You know, Dorsen. This is a bit rude to say, but I’d have to side with Lady Iris. ”

“For what reason, Mother?”

“Considering Lady Yuri courted a man with a fiancee, and that man ended up stolen away, I’d say Lady Iris’ harassment was not uncalled for. A woman who loves her fiance had her fiance seduced by another woman. It wasn’t unjustified for Lady Iris to channel all her jealousy and hate at Lady Yuri.”

“That is..”

“The man she loved was stolen. She was even exiled from society because you guys confronted her in front of everyone.”

I recalled her last words at the Academy. Tears streaming down her face, she said “What more do you guys plan on taking from me? First my fiance and then my position…”

“I see these teacakes as her resolution. The resolution to live alone, to make it through society without having to rely on marriage. Considering she was banished from society and her engagement was annulled, finding another engagement would be nearly impossible. Dorsen, you.. You raised your hand against that girl, supported a conspiracy, and on top that looked down upon her… Do you think that’s correct as a knight?”

“That is..”

I couldn’t even object. I hadn’t thought about it. I hadn’t seen that she’d be in pain, that she’d be depressed… I hadn’t considered those obvious things.

“I understand you wanted to protect the girl you liked. But did you really hone your skills for that reason alone? Did you feel fulfillment when you raised your hand against such a girl?”

Mother’s words stabbed my heart even more. I began to think she was right, but there’s also no going back.

“I can’t say too much since I’m not a knight, but I can say for sure what you did to Lady Iris is the same exact thing as pure violence.”

When I was lectured by father, all I could feel was contempt. But now I felt pangs of confusion and regret.

“You should reflect on your actions more.”

After conversing with mother, she permitted my return to the Academy saying too many absences were bad. I attended my classes as usual, and I once again returned to the training grounds. I wanted to clear my mind after listening to mother. Maybe I wanted to run away from the truth mother had revealed to me, or Lady Iris’ words. I wasn’t sure which. I graduated from school while avoiding meeting Lady Yuri or Prince Edward.

After graduation, as planned, I joined the Order. I continued my life learning under my seniors.

Then one day, a mock battle with the Army was announced. I was confused as to why I was invited. I agreed to the invitation since it’d be a great opportunity anyways.

There, General Gazelle appeared. Although being affiliated with the Army, General Gazelle is well respected in the Order as well. Beside him were his apprentices. Upon hearing that those two were his apprentices, the Army and Order began to buzz. To be honest, even if one wanted to be taught directly by General Gazelle, it was impossible. His popularity made it impossible to find students.

After being introduced to the three, the matches began. The crowd seemed to get more excited with every match. Eventually we came down to 2 wins and 2 losses. Next would be my turn. Expecting it, I stood up. In front of me was one guy from the Army Corps. As the time ticked down to the start of the match, General Gazelle declared that we should fight his two apprentices instead.

Interesting… I thought. To fight against my idol’s apprentices… I was excited to see how skilled they are. I was excited to see how much I’d grown.

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