Chapter 133: Don’t Decide My Happiness

Kaiser’s Perspective:

11:39 PM – 1/1/2018

“Honestly, Celia… I’m really just an average person.” My words felt heavy, like stones dropping one by one.

“No talents, no magic, not even skills. I live off those cheap quests no one else wants…”

Her breathing changed—shorter, sharper. Her shoulders rose just a bit, like she was holding something in.

I swallowed, continuing.

“Some men can give the world to the one they love. They can make flowers bloom from their palms, conjure gifts, and bring down stars if they want.”

I shook my head slightly.

“Me? I can only hand you a flower I picked from the roadside… and it won’t be special.”

Celia’s posture stiffened. Her legs curled just a little closer to herself. A quiet sign of hurt.

“They’d take you to lavish places. Show you the beauty of this world. Sky-palaces, underwater kingdoms… whole worlds you’d probably adore.” My voice lowered.

“And I can barely afford two meals a day.” Her grip tightened again—this time trembling.

“They’d be able to protect you. Keep you safe. While I… get injured in almost every fight.” I let out a humorless breath.

“Barely escaping with my life because of how weak I am.”

Celia’s head dipped forward a bit—her breath hitched. A tiny, angry exhale escaped her nose.

“People ridicule me, mock me… the weakest adventurer alive.” I looked down.

“No magic, nothing special. And if you stay with me… they’ll ridicule you too. Just for being by my side.”

Her shoulders shook once.

Outside, the blizzard softened—like even the storm felt awkward intruding on this.

I looked up at the tent roof, then back down, remembering.

“You… love the moon, don’t you?” I whispered.

“Back in Levinton, you watched it every night before sleeping. You told me how much you wanted to know what our world looked like from up there.” A sad smile tugged at my lips.

“It was dreamy, adorable… like a fairytale you wanted to live.” Her breathing got uneven.

Nails dug into my arm—not enough to hurt, but enough to scream her emotions.

I lowered my voice even more.

“And even if I spent my entire life trying… Celia, I could never make that dream come true.” My throat tightened.

“I can’t take you to the moon. I can’t give you the world. I’m just… a nobody struggling to get by.”

A small, broken sound escaped her. Barely a whimper.

“That’s why… you shouldn’t choose me.”

Her whole body jolted—like those words stabbed her.

“There will be someone better than me,”

I whispered into her shoulder.

“Someone who can make you truly happy. Someone who can give you everything you deserve.”

Her head slowly lowered, shaking—not in denial, but in desperate hurt.

“Someone with power. Someone respected. Someone who can stand next to you proudly.” My voice cracked a bit.

“Someone who could take you to the moon… and show you its beauty.”

Celia’s chest heaved, breath trembling now. I rested my forehead gently against her shoulder.

“That’s why, Celia…” A whisper that almost broke me as I said it—

“It’s better… if you forget me.”

Her whole body froze. Like her heart stopped along with it.

“No… I can’t…” Her voice shook so hard it almost wasn’t a voice, sob tangled in a whisper.

But I kept going anyway, because the truth was cruel and I had to say it.

“You’ll be happier then, Celia…” The words dragged out of me like they were tearing something on the way out.

“I know how much you care for me… how deeply you love me… how much you appreciate even the smallest thing I do.”

She trembled again — harder this time. Her fingers curled into the fabric of my sleeve like she was holding on for dear life.

I continued, softer, heavier.

“But the truth is… I don’t think I deserve any of that. I’m just a nobody who happened to meet you at the right time. Lucky, Celia. That’s all I am. Lucky you noticed me… lucky you cared.” I breathed shakily.

“I’m nothing special.”

Her body flinched — her shoulders tightening. Tears fell onto my arm, warm and trembling.

“Look at you,” I whispered, my voice wavering.

“Look how far you’ve come. You’re stronger than before… and you’ll only go higher from here. You have a future filled with possibilities I can’t even imagine.” My throat tightened again.

“And me? My fate was decided long before I met you. An E-rank nobody barely scraping by.”

Another flinch. A quiet gasp of pain.

“If you stay with me… I’ll only drag you down.”

Her entire body jolted — like that sentence physically struck her. More tears. Her hands shook violently.

“I’ll hold you back from the life you dream of… the sky you want to chase… the world you want to explore.” My voice softened into a whisper.

“Staying with me means shrinking that sky.”

She shook her head desperately, small sobs slipping out — but I kept talking, even though each word made her crumble more.

I inhaled deeply.

“And someday… when your kind heart finally realizes my true worth… you’ll resent me. You’ll wish I disappeared before I became such a burden.”

“D-don’t say that… don’t…” Her voice cracked, breaking apart.

But I didn’t stop.

“It’s the truth, Celia.” I rested my forehead against her shoulder, feeling her shaking beneath my touch.

“I’m disposable. Just a Chapter in your life, nothing more.”

Her sob grew louder — a wounded whimper escaping her chest.

“It’ll hurt to let me go at first… yeah.” My tone softened painfully.

“But you’ll heal. And once you do… that pain will fade. You’ll smile again. You’ll live better without me.”

She sobbed harder, her nails digging into my arm in desperation.

“My absence…” I swallowed.

“…will make you happier.”

“N-no it won’t— it won’t—” she cried.

I brushed a thumb under her chin gently, even though she refused to look up.

“Celia, in the future I’ll embarrass you. People will ask why someone like you would choose someone like me. A man who can’t use magic. Who can barely defend himself. Who struggles to provide even a simple meal.”

“Someday…” The words trembled.

“…you’ll get tired of choosing me over everything else. And when you finally see how much you had to give up… you’ll walk away.”

“You’re wrong…” she whispered shakily, her voice broken, fragile.

“So wrong…”

But I held her gently, continuing.

“It’s better if you lose these feelings now— while your heart’s still whole.” I exhaled through the ache.

“If you keep loving me… it’ll only hurt more later. When my worthlessness catches up to you.”

“Stop it… stop… please…” She whimpered like she could barely breathe.

I hugged her a little tighter.

“Eventually someone better will come along…” My voice got softer, sadder.

“…and you’ll choose them. The moment you see how they shine compared to me.”

Her sobbing grew louder — painful, trembling, raw.

“They’ll give you everything, Celia. Their heart. Their protection. Their whole world.” I whispered against her ear.

“They’ll take you anywhere your heart desires… even show you the beauties of the world you dream about.” Another breath.

“…even take you to the moon.”

She broke. Tears streaming.

Her whole frame trembling violently in my arms.

My voice cracked too.

“You’ll search for me a little while… in their smile, in their touch. But eventually… you’ll accept it.” I exhaled shakily.

“You’ll realize losing me was the best thing that ever happened to you.”

Her hands shot up to clutch my arms, gripping me like she was terrified of being torn away.

I gave the faintest, saddest smile against her shoulder.

“So…” A breath. A whisper drenched in sorrow.

“…move on, gorgeous.”

I brushed her hair gently, tender despite the pain between us.

“There will be men who beg for your pretty little heart.” My voice almost broke.

“And you… you won’t regret losing me. You’ll be happier without me.”

My fingers drifted up, brushing the newly tied ribbon — soft, warm from her hair, glowing faintly with both her mana and my blood lingering inside it.

“This ribbon…” The words came out slow, trembling.

“…should be my last gift to you.”

Her shoulders stiffened immediately, but I kept going.

“I hope you’ll like it,” I murmured, my thumb grazing the crimson threads.

“I know how much you love me, Celia… and that’s exactly why I used my ring finger to stain it.” My voice trembled. “I let my blood color it.”

Her breathing hitched sharply.

I exhaled, staring at the ribbon with a bittersweet smile.

“They call the ring finger the ’vena amoris’ — the vein of love, the one said to lead straight to the heart.” I forced a small, bitter laugh. “They say that’s where lovers place their promised rings… their vows… the seals that bind them.”

I gave a small, humorless laugh.

“And here I am.” A sad smirk tugged at my lips.

“The best I can give you is an ordinary ribbon and a little bit of my blood.”

Her fists slowly curled at her sides.

“Something so… insignificant,” I whispered.

“Compared to the future waiting for you.”

That was the final straw.

Her whole body went rigid — then suddenly she stood up, turning sharply on her heel. Hair whipped around, eyes blazing through a blur of tears. Breath trembled with hurt and fury, her jaw clenched so tight it shook.

“Kai…” Her voice cracked.

“T-that’s enough.”

But I didn’t stop. I tried speaking again—

“SHUT UP!”

Her teeth gritted. Fingers curling like she wanted to grab me and shake sense into me.

“Just— just stop talking like that…” Her chest heaved; she wiped her tears aggressively with the back of her hand.

“Stop acting like you know what makes me happy. Like you get to choose it for me.”

She stepped closer — fists trembling.

“Everything you just said… all of it… you’re wrong.”

“I don’t care about the rich life or adventures…” One tear slid down her cheek, and she didn’t even bother wiping it.

“I don’t care about someone who’s respected or powerful or admired.”

She pointed to her chest — then to me. Her hands shook violently.

“I care about you.”

Another step.

“You keep saying you’ll drag me down.”

“You keep deciding what my future should look like.”

“You keep insisting I’ll regret loving you—”

Her voice suddenly rose, broken and loud:

“But you never even asked what I truly want!”

Her tears fell faster.

“You talk like you’re a burden. Like you’re trash. Like you don’t deserve me.” Her voice cracked again, frustration boiling.

“Kai… I don’t want someone stronger. I don’t want someone richer. I don’t want someone better.”

She pressed her trembling hand to her aching chest.

“I want you.” Her breath shuddered.

“You say you can only give me flowers you pick with your hands.” Her lips quivered into a sad smile.

“Good. That’s all I want. Flowers you picked.”

“You say you can only take me to small places, not the ends of the world.” She shook her head fiercely.

“I don’t care about seeing the world. I care about seeing you everywhere I go.”

“You say you’re weak.” She clenched her fists, tears dripping off her chin.

“Then I’ll protect you. I’ll get so strong they won’t dare to go against you.”

Her voice softened, trembling but firm.

“I don’t want someone who can take me to the moon. I don’t want a man who can give me the world…” She stepped closer, hand rising to touch my cheek — shaking violently.

Her lips quivered, her breath warm and shaky.

“Kai…” Her voice dropped to a whisper full of conviction.

“I’ll tell you exactly what I’ve always wanted.”

She leaned in, eyes burning with devotion and pain.

“And you can’t change my mind.”

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