He Jin’s head almost exploded after what Fire told him, what he had been anticipating finally came…
In fact, since the birth of their baby in the game, He Jin obviously felt the change of their relationship. It has been extended from the game to the reality, and from online love to offline affection. Also, they started to give each other company at night, they started caring about each other during difficult situations. There was even money involved…indeed, they’d crossed the boundaries. And He Jin was enjoying it. He adored Fire, but he still dared not develop such a relationship in reality, and that’s why he’s been pretending to not see anything. He enjoyed taking the warmth from Fire selfishly.
He Jin knew clearly that there would be a drastic change to this relationship one day. And things would start going out of control. But he didn’t expect such a change to come so soon.
“Am I making things difficult for you?” Seeing that He Jin hasn’t replied for so long, Fire finally asked.
He Jin looked at him and he couldn’t act as calmly as before, “we…didn’t we say before…that game is game…” he uttered these words with much difficulties. And he almost had to squeeze these words out, as he was not saying what he really meant. He also wanted to develop this relationship with Fire, and he wanted to know this person more. If he did, he wouldn’t have to be affected mentally by a certain person with the same voice…
“Sorry, if it’s in the reality, then I can’t do it.” But the words that were said sounded so determined and rational.
“Why?” Fire frowned and he couldn’t hide his sadness and disappointment.
He sounded a bit desperate, “because you’re straight? You’re heterosexual?”
He Jin didn’t answer to that question, but he used a pleading tone to ask, “just in the game…can’t we?”
Fire said with his depressed face, “what if I say I cannot?”
He Jin was stunned and he looked at Fire, scared.
Fire, “Hua University, right? How many boys are there in your school that are called He Jin? I remember that you’re one year higher than me, are you in year 3 then? It should be easy to find you. If I insist, then how can you…”
“Don’t!” He Jin interrupted him in a panic, “if you do this, I won’t talk to you anymore. And I will quit the game!”
Fire breathed heavily, he was so angry that his face went pale. He never expected He Jin to use this “I will quit the game” strategy to threaten him. He thought to himself – if He Jin knew that he’s Qin Yang, then will he stop talking to himself?
He Jin seemed to realize that his words were a little hurtful. Finally, he explained, “Fire, listen to me. In fact, from the moment that you said that you like me, I started to be very confused. What made you like me? You said that you’ve waited for me for eight years, and I was surprised to hear that. It also made me feel guilty. That’s why I wanted to compensate you in the game, and play with you…but even eight years ago, we were not that closed either. Sometimes I think, that you don’t know me that much, and I don’t know you that much either. In reality, I’m just an ordinary person, maybe you’re one too. But the Internet has made it possible for us to imagine each other as a virtual figure. Therefore, your admiration to me might as well be a sort of stubbornness only…”
Fire found it funny to listen to the explanation of He Jin, and he asked, “so, do you think that the ‘Ah Jin’ that I like isn’t you, but the ‘you’ that I’ve imagined myself?”
He Jin nodded lightly. This is one of the reasons why he refused Fire. It was also one of the most important reasons. For him, Fire’s feelings for him were too surreal, and it made He Jin become reluctant to face his emotions directly.
Qin Yang smiled bitterly. If he had heard these words before seeing He Jin in person, he might find it impossible to refute. He admitted that the past eight years of waiting have become a stubbornness. However, after seeing He Jin in real person, and after having fallen in love with him for real, it was for sure now that Qin Yang couldn’t live without He Jin.
Fire, “if you think that I don’t you know well enough, then we can get to know each other more.”
He Jin shook his head and summoned his courage, “no, Fire. This fantasy is good enough. I have the same fantasy to you now, and I don’t want to break it.”
Fire, “…”
After all, He Jin still couldn’t ignore the sense of inferiority that stemmed from the bottom of his heart. Although he had already realized his sexual orientation, in the past two decades, He Jin’s concept of love still stayed between men and women. As a male, when being perceived by another man as a “lover”, he still feared even though that person was handsome and had a great personality.
He feared that in reality, he would disappoint Fire, or that Fire would disappoint him.
He Jin refused Qin Yang very simply, making Qin Yang feel like being trapped inside a wall, he couldn’t advance nor retreat. He just didn’t know what to do.
Last time, He Jin used “I’m not gay” as a reason to push him away, this time he used another one. After all, He Jin always has a reason. But Qin Yang couldn’t let go, “you still remember during the Chinese New Year, when you told me that you don’t mind what my gender is? And that you wouldn’t mind even if I’m ugly? Did you mean what you said?”
.
He Jin was stunned and he lowered his eyes, “yes. But if it’s just a game, as long as we get along, no one cares even if his partner looks like a dog. However, in reality, I’d be lying if I tell you that I wouldn’t mind.”
He’d rather let everything stay in the game. He Jin was selfishly thinking, that it’d be better to keep this beautiful relationship in the virtual reality, rather than making each other disappointed. At least, they don’t have to be responsible to each other in the game.
…
Fire had nothing more to say. He nodded and said coldly, “okay, I’m not forcing you anymore. Just pretend that I’ve said nothing.”
He Jin saw the depressed look of Fire, and his heart felt bitter too.
After a stalemate for a long while, he said, “Fire…look, we contact each other in reality too. We are already friends…”
Fire did not respond, then He Jin lowered his head and said again, “we often say good night to each other now. I never thought we would become like this…”
There was still no reply from the opposite side. He Jin dared not look up, “all of a sudden, you talked about the reality. It kind of scared me.”
He blushed, held his fist and trembled, “can we…can we take it slowly?” This should give Fire some hope?
It’s really hard to develop their relationship in reality. He had nothing now. He just had a big fight with his parents, he had to study and work, he had no idea about his future, if he had to endure more pressure from a homosexual relationship, He Jin was sure that he would break down…
Surrounded by silence, He Jin looked up in panic, and he saw that the opposite party had appeared as “offline” for some time.
He Jin, “…”
After the ambush in the air, and after Fire suddenly got offline, other teammates were not in the mood to play anymore. Twig Fence sent a message to He Jin and asked where he was, and whether he still wanted to PK. He Jin refused and told Twig Fence that he’d continue some other day.
Dead Water and the other teammates also saw the “offline” status of Fire. After sending a message to He Jin for confirmation, they got offline one by one.
He Jin looked at the disappearance of Fire, and he stood in the resurrection point for a long time, but he didn’t see Fire’s name flash again. Then, Dumpling appeared next to him and was flying quietly behind him. Maybe he has been there since he started to talk with Fire, but he was behaving well and hadn’t interrupted them.
He Jin waved his hands and let Dumpling fly close to him. He held Dumpling close, who made these soft “Ji Ji” sounds, and waved his wings.
“Little fool…” He Jin touched his wings, and they felt fluffy, “is Daddy a coward?”
Dumpling turned his head, and made another “Ji” sound, as if he’s saying, “yes.”
He Jin smiled, but his smile looked uglier than crying…
It was later than midnight. There was an announcement from the system, reminding everyone that it’s the 14th February, the Valentine’s Day.
He Jin flew to the game mall with Dumpling and picked 9 roses.
He couldn’t afford to buy 999 roses, but 9 is just the same as 999, they both mean “long”, it’s a way to express one’s love toward the other person.
He Jin chose the express service from the florist, and the person who would receive the 9 roses was Fire. When Fire got online again, he would receive the gift.
Fire, I’m sorry.
After getting offline, He Jin quickly went to check his bracelet. There were no unread messages. Fire didn’t send him anything, not even “goodnight”.
He Jin was hesitating whether he should send a “Happy Valentine’s Day” wish to Fire. But then he thought, he had already hurt Fire by rejecting him, he would be the worst person to send such a message…
Fire isn’t happy.
Source: Webnovel.com, updated by NovelKeep
Chapters
- Chapter 217 - Side story (6)
- Chapter 216
- Chapter 215
- Chapter 214 - Side story (4)
- Chapter 213
- Chapter 212 - Side story (3)
- Chapter 211
- Chapter 210 - Side story (2)
- Chapter 209
- Chapter 208
- Chapter 207
- Chapter 206
- Chapter 205
- Chapter 204
- Chapter 203
- Chapter 202
- Chapter 201
- Chapter 200
- Chapter 199
- Chapter 198
- Chapter 197
- Chapter 196
- Chapter 195
- Chapter 194
- Chapter 193
- Chapter 192
- Chapter 191
- Chapter 190
- Chapter 189
- Chapter 188
- Chapter 187
- Chapter 186
- Chapter 185
- Chapter 184
- Chapter 183
- Chapter 182
- Chapter 181
- Chapter 180
- Chapter 179
- Chapter 178
- Chapter 177
- Chapter 176
- Chapter 175
- Chapter 174
- Chapter 173
- Chapter 172
- Chapter 171
- Chapter 170
- Chapter 169
- Chapter 168
- Chapter 167
- Chapter 166
- Chapter 165
- Chapter 164
- Chapter 163
- Chapter 162
- Chapter 161
- Chapter 160
- Chapter 159
- Chapter 158
- Chapter 157
- Chapter 156
- Chapter 155
- Chapter 154
- Chapter 153
- Chapter 152
- Chapter 151
- Chapter 150
- Chapter 149
- Chapter 148
- Chapter 147
- Chapter 146 - Ah Jin Is A Guy
- Chapter 145 - Victory In The Team Match
- Chapter 144 - It Doesn’t Make Sense
- Chapter 143
- Chapter 142
- Chapter 141
- Chapter 140
- Chapter 139
- Chapter 138
- Chapter 137
- Chapter 136
- Chapter 135 - Stay Away From Me
- Chapter 134 - The Upgrading Match
- Chapter 133
- Chapter 132
- Chapter 131
- Chapter 130
- Chapter 129
- Chapter 128
- Chapter 127 - He Played It Too Well
- Chapter 126
- Chapter 125
- Chapter 124
- Chapter 123
- Chapter 122
- Chapter 121
- Chapter 120
- Chapter 119
- Chapter 118
- Chapter 117
- Chapter 116
- Chapter 115
- Chapter 114
- Chapter 113
- Chapter 112 - Not My Boyfriend
- Chapter 111
- Chapter 110 - Rest well
- Chapter 109
- Chapter 108
- Chapter 107
- Chapter 106
- Chapter 105 - I Like You
- Chapter 104 - Ambush In The Air
- Chapter 103
- Chapter 102 - The Ones Inside Usually Have No Idea
- Chapter 101 - The Same Voice
- Chapter 100
- Chapter 99
- Chapter 98
- Chapter 97
- Chapter 96
- Chapter 95 - Leaving Home
- Chapter 94 - My Helmet Got Smashed
- Chapter 93 - My Helmet Got Smashed
- Chapter 92
- Chapter 91
- Chapter 90
- Chapter 89
- Chapter 88
- Chapter 87
- Chapter 86
- Chapter 85
- Chapter 84
- Chapter 83
- Chapter 82
- Chapter 81
- Chapter 80
- Chapter 79
- Chapter 78
- Chapter 77
- Chapter 76
- Chapter 75
- Chapter 74
- Chapter 73
- Chapter 72
- Chapter 71 - Arm Got Hurt
- Chapter 70
- Chapter 69
- Chapter 68
- Chapter 67
- Chapter 66
- Chapter 65
- Chapter 64
- Chapter 63
- Chapter 62
- Chapter 61
- Chapter 60
- Chapter 59
- Chapter 58
- Chapter 57
- Chapter 56
- Chapter 55
- Chapter 54
- Chapter 53
- Chapter 52
- Chapter 51
- Chapter 50
- Chapter 49
- Chapter 48
- Chapter 47
- Chapter 46
- Chapter 45
- Chapter 44
- Chapter 43
- Chapter 42
- Chapter 41
- Chapter 40
- Chapter 39
- Chapter 38
- Chapter 37
- Chapter 36
- Chapter 35
- Chapter 34
- Chapter 33
- Chapter 32
- Chapter 31
- Chapter 30
- Chapter 29
- Chapter 28
- Chapter 27
- Chapter 26
- Chapter 25
- Chapter 24
- Chapter 23
- Chapter 22
- Chapter 21
- Chapter 20
- Chapter 19
- Chapter 18
- Chapter 17
- Chapter 16
- Chapter 15
- Chapter 14
- Chapter 13
- Chapter 12
- Chapter 11
- Chapter 10
- Chapter 9
- Chapter 8
- Chapter 7
- Chapter 6
- Chapter 5
- Chapter 4
- Chapter 3
- Chapter 2
- Chapter 1