Chapter 23: Chapter 23: Beast Ball Etiquette

Cinderella.

That’s what I feel like. I feel like Cinderella getting ready for the ball, minus the prince. And the wicked stepmother.

Well, not quite without the wicked stepmother. Ser Maartenwitz fills that role. He’s not telling us we CAN’T go to the ball,. because he’d get fired. Instead, he’s making the ball zero fun. He has written the rules down on a blackboard and on a piece of paper, and the System is displaying them in a handy-dandy pop-up.

SER MAARTENWITZ’S RULES AND BALL ETIQUETTE

* Behave properly at all times. Do honor to this house and your tamer.

* Wear your collar to identify yourself as a member of House Riddlehoeven at all times. DO NOT TAKE IT OFF.

* Do not get into fights unless it is a demonstration of beast taming (unlikely).

* If a beast from another great house provokes you, walk away. Find the Master and Mistress. Find Mistress Kaline or Mistress Vedette.

* Do not go off with anyone from another house by yourself, because this is disloyal to your tamer and your house. Not a good look. Also, some unscrupulous members of the beast taming houses have ON OCCASION been known to try and entice beasts away from someone else’s house. It is rare, and severely punished by law and social ostracism, but it happens.

* If you are uncomfortable with a situation, always, always go find your tamer first. If you possess Telepathy (Level 3 and above), you can communicate with your tamer. If you do not, you need to rely on your bond and your animal body language to communicate.

* When you are announced along with your tamer, stand proudly. Lift your tail. For birds, showing off wingspan is always welcome. Insects should show off as much as possible.

* The Beast Parade is the traditional way to open a Beast Ball. You will make one circuit with your tamer, then another by yourself. DO NOT stray from the parade. No darting away to grab food off a tray or chase something.

* Keep your claws and teeth to yourself.

* Mating at the ball is most ill-advised. Beast mating and breeding is a very precise affair. As with humans, the wrong mate can bring endless trouble. However, with younger animals, this is not an issue. Still, the instincts may be there.

MATING?

I’m just a tiger cub. Mating? Not even on my radar. But do tamed beasts even get to mate, or is it just another ritual? Oh, System?

[Mating and Breeding: Tamed beasts are eligible to mate with each other and even crossbreed. Often, beast mating is used much like human weddings to seal alliances between beast taming houses. It also helps the houses maintain a supply of beasts.]

Hmmm. But if beasts are born in the house, doesn’t that automatically mean the beasts are tame? Isn’t it better to do what Kaline and Vedette did?

[Even though a beast may be born in a major house, that does not mean the beast is tame. He or she still needs to go through the same beast taming process as animals in the wild. Beast mating is a way to help boost the population of available beasts to be tamed.]

Tell me more about beast mating, System!

[That information is restricted at your level.]

Super. What level is acceptable?

[Level 4 and above. Or until you mature, whichever comes first.]

That doesn’t sound so hard. I want to grow as fast as possible.

Do I get XP points for this Beast Ball?

[Objective: Attend the Beast Ball. Make at least one useful connection, beast or human. Make the House of RiddleHoeven look good. Avoid beast thieves. Uncover clues about the theft of the beasts from prominent houses, including the House of Riddlehoeven. +3 XP]

That seems simple enough.

Gussie flaps her wings. [How exciting. I’m going to wear a collar, and maybe some jewels.]

[Jewels?] Demos makes a rude sound.

Gussie clicks her beak disapprovingly. [HEY! Just because you’re a ruffian doesn’t mean I have to be!] Then she adds, “Jewels,” out loud.

Maartenwitz beams. “Yes, yes! I nearly forgot. ’All beasts must be adorned. Jewels and ribbons and rosettes.”

Demos and I exchange a dismayed glance.

[For real? Verily?] I stomp my feet. [I’ll look ridiculous.]

[Oh, what are you both complaining about?] Gussie’s cheerfulness grates on my nerves. [We all need to look good, to do honor to this house and our tamers.]

Maartenwitz looks us up and down. “You two could learn from her example. A rosette pinned to your fur…jewels woven throughout on ribbons…how often do you get to show off?”

Let’s hope very infrequently. I’m not some prize poodle, bejeweled and dressed to suit its owner’s whims.

[No, you’re not a poodle.] Demos laughs. [They are more intelligent than you.]

[Very funny. Just for that, I hope they paint you with glitter.]

Demos gasps in horror. [Bite your tongue!]

Oh no. Glitter is a thing here! Come to think of it, I remember seeing it on the clickable Beast Accessories menu. I can see it in front of me.

[Accessories Menu

Basic: Formal Collar, Ribbons, Jewels, Rosettes, Glitter

Upgrades (Lvl 5 and above): Enchanted Collar, Wreaths, Vests, Shorts, Woolen Cap, Gentleman’s Hat, Ladies’ Bonnet, Ladies’ Hat, Fancy Socks, Dress Robe…]

Dress Robe? What is this, Harry Potter?

And why, for the love of God, would tamed beasts need clothes? Oh, System?

[Certain Houses like to dress their beasts up during outings and formal events. They do not affect any of the beasts’ performance and stats, except Charisma.]

Charisma? By dressing up to look like furry people?

Gussie and Demos are bickering back and forth about the merits, or lack thereof, of ribbons and jewels and rosettes.

I was looking forward to this ball, but now I wish I could just stay home and do anything else. Oh well. As long as I don’t look too ridiculous, and I find whoever took Memo and Judo, then bring on the ribbons and jewels.

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