Chapter 428: Advice

“Do you know if Gunnar has any interest in men?”

Jay paused, her spoon of honey porridge halfway to her open mouth. Terrance had been sitting next to her quietly eating his own porridge for the past several minutes without a word between them. The sudden question took her off guard and she struggled for a moment to refocus her thoughts onto the present rather than the plans for the future she had been working on.

“I honestly don’t know,” Jay answered as she slowly lowered her spoon back to her bowl. “I’ve never spoken to him about his interests in that regard. Why?”

“Hm. Well, you know,” Terrance rolled his shoulders before taking another bite of porridge. Glancing up at her, he swallowed the mouthful and continued. “I thought I might try my luck. I just don’t know how receptive he would be and thought you might have some insight.”

“Ah. Well, I don’t think I’ve ever seen him respond to any flirting from the ladies in his old squad, so maybe? Can’t hurt to ask.”

“I suppose so. Best to just find out straight from the source.”

Jay nodded her head in agreement, then gave the human man a curious look.

“Gunnar, though? He’s so… serious.”

“True,” Terrance shrugged, “but look at that body. And you know what they say. Elves are twice as fun.”

“I… did not know that anyone said that,” Jay struggled not to laugh at the implication. “But I’m using that in the future. Anyway, if you end up talking to him, just be straightforward with your intentions. In my experience, if you don’t make it super clear, people won’t know if you’re flirting or just being friendly. Better to make it as clear as possible so there’s no room for misinterpretation.”

“Thanks,” Terrance nodded his head thoughtfully before giving Jay a smile. “I appreciate the advice. Well, no time like the present. Better go approach the man before I lose my nerve.”

With that, the former city runner scraped the last of his porridge into his mouth before setting the bowl down in the pile of other dishes by the washing bin. With a look of determination, he walked out of the kitchen and into the main hall of the headquarters.

As the door swung shut behind the man, Jay tossed a look towards the only other person in the kitchen. Hans gazed back evenly at her before giving a small shrug and returning to his task of preparing ingredients for lunch.

“Good luck,” Jay said to the air before returning to her breakfast.

The morning after the first flight of The Behemoth had been a hectic one so far. Jadis had been busily helping Sabina with many different tasks, both for the next test flight as well as the production of more enchantments and airships. She had also been helping the rest of her companions with other tasks as well. Aila was looking into hiring more support staff so they could scale up production, Eir was investigating the possibility of buying some of the neighboring properties so they could expand their storage capacity, and Kerr and Thea were busy sourcing more materials for airship construction. While not working on airship-related projects, the rest of her companions were busy, too. Bridget had become something of a de facto trainer for the new recruits and was giving basic combat lessons to Villum, Humbert, and Cora. Sorcha was working on her greenhouse garden of herbs while also expanding her wand collection, which was slowly getting more and more potent. Then there was Alex, methodically interrogating the Demons that Tegwyn’s team had just captured.

There was a lot going on and Jadis was seriously considering taking a break so she could go redo her duplication ritual and give herself a couple more bodies. She never thought that having three separate selves would ever feel like not enough, but that had proven to be a naive expectation. In leu of fucking herself into two more existences, Jadis was just running around to where she was needed and eating where and when she could in the moments between.

Setting her own bowl down in the growing dish pile, Jay thanked Hans for the quick meal and headed back outside into the yard. Her Dys self was inside the forge with Sabina, helping her and her assistants with some parts of the manufacturing process that needed muscle. Her Syd self was inside the back office with Alex, interrogating the two Demons. So, for the moment, Jay headed for the greenhouse on the far back wall of the storage yard. Sorcha had asked her to come by when she could, so Jay aimed to fulfill her goblin lover’s request.

As she walked through the yard, Jay saw that Bridget and her small class had taken a break. Her orcish lover was having a conversation with Humbert about the pole hook he was using as an improvised weapon but still took a moment to smile and wave at Jay as she passed. Jay returned the gesture by blowing a kiss her way.

An unexpected figure hurried up next to Jay as she walked towards the greenhouse, causing her to look away from her flustered warrior woman’s reaction.

“Excuse me, ma’am,” Villum said as he came up next to her, practically jogging to keep up with her stride. “May I ask you a question, if you have a moment?”

“Yeah, of course,” Jay said as she slowed her pace so that Villum could walk at a more normal speed. “What’s up?”

“I was hoping you could tell me which gift women find to be more appealing. Flowers or sweets?”

Jay came to a full stop and turned to face the young elf directly.

“What?”

Villum looked up at her, his eyes wide in a nervous expression. He did a good job at not fidgeting, but his rigid posture made it clear that he was using all of his courage not to wilt under her gaze.

“Are flowers or sweets a better gift when courting a lady?” Villum repeated his question. “I… I can’t afford a more expensive gift at the moment, unless you think it would be better to wait and save my coin to spend on jewelry? Humbert told me that jewelry is best but my father said that such luxuries aren’t necessary…”

Jadis had no idea where the question was coming from, especially since she and the elf had never spoken about any romantic matters before, but the earnest look in Villum’s eyes convinced her that he really was just looking for some help.

“Do you know this lady?” Jay asked.

“Yes, of course,” Villum nodded his head vigorously. “We have lived on the same street for eight years.”

“Have you actually spoken to this lady before?”

“Many times,” Villum nodded again. “Hilda is a bright and witty conversationalist, far more so than I am. She is clever and charming and has such an amazing way of knowing what to say to brighten a person’s day—”

“It sounds like you know this Hilda pretty well,” Jay broke in before the lovestruck elf could ramble on. “Why are you asking me what women like? Don’t you know what Hilda, as an individual, likes? I can promise you that a gift that shows your care and consideration for her interests will be a thousand times better received than a generic gift you picked out because ‘girls like this stuff’ as a reason.”

When Villum’s anxiousness turned to a confused expression, Jay leaned down a little closer to the younger man.

“It doesn’t have to be expensive. In fact, if she’s the kind of girl that’ll look down on a present because it didn’t cost a lot of money, drop her and forget her. She wouldn’t be interested in you, just your coin purse. The important thing is giving a gift that shows you are thinking about her.”

“I… see. Yes, I do see,” Villum said slowly as a dawning look of comprehension came across his face. “I do understand now, thank you! I think I know what would please Hilda. Thank you, ma’am! I will treasure your wise words! Thank you!”

“You don’t have to call me ma’am,” Jay said to Villum’s back as he quickly rushed away.

Shaking her head, Jay turned and continued on her way to Sorcha’s greenhouse.

Greenhouses weren’t a new concept to Oros. In fact, many nobles had greenhouses built into their mansions since it allowed them to have both fresh flowers for their tables and fresh vegetables for their kitchens. Some even had greenhouses large enough to support fruit trees. The greenhouse that Jadis had built with the help of Eir’s parents and their glass-making business wasn’t anywhere near large enough to hold trees, but it was a decently large space that would hold up well when compared to most plant nurseries that Jadis remembered from back on Earth.

Jadis didn’t have a green thumb, but she wasn’t bad with plants, either. Her grandmother had always been an avid gardener, so she had learned a few things over the years just by helping her grandma with different chores around her garden. Of course, what Jadis knew about growing plants was nothing compared to what Sorcha knew. The witchy goblin had been raising herbs as a living for much of her life, so she didn’t need any help from Jadis to know what to do to set things up. Add the fact that they had a literal Dryad on the team, and it was a sure thing that the indoor garden was well taken care of and would be able to regularly produce a fine crop of expensive plants and herbs that were useful for alchemy.

However, Jadis was able to at least suggest one method of gardening that had never occurred to either Sorcha or Tegwyn, or quite possibly anyone else on Oros to date.

 “Jadis!” Sorcha called out as Jay ducked into the greenhouse. “Come here and look at this!”

Sorcha was standing on a step stool that let her overlook a large, clay basin. It was one of several that had been set up in a suspended column held up by a wooden frame that reached all the way up to the ceiling of the greenhouse. Each basin had dozens of short, leafy plants growing in them, all of which were far bigger than when Jadis had last visited.

“Looks like the crop is coming along,” Jay grinned as she examined the dark green leaves and their strange, red and yellow striped pattern on the undersides. “How long until harvest?”

“I can start harvesting now,” Sorcha picked one of the leaves with a pair of shears and took a deep sniff of the cut end. “This sunblood is already fully grown. It grew so much faster than normal!”

“I told you—” Jay started to say but Sorcha quickly waved the leaf in her face.

“Yes, yes, you told me so. Hydro-pony-whatever. It’s great! Tegwyn’s trying to figure out how to make the recirculating version you were telling us about now that he’s seen how well this pot version is working. He’s working with some water mages on it from the temples. I told him not to bother Sabby with it, don’t want to overwhelm her. She’s busy enough with all of that airship stuff and her ‘secret surprise’ she’s working on.”

“Where is Teg, anyway?” Jay asked as she looked around the garden.

“Over here,” Teg called out, one of his hands visibly waving over the side of one of the large, raised platforms where more plants were growing that hadn’t been set up for hydroponics.

When Jay and Sorcha joined the Dryad, they found that the man had several large, yellow gourds stacked in a pile and was in the process of picking a few more from the vines he was tending to. The gourds looked almost like round watermelons but were the color of straw and had lots of little warty bumps spread unevenly across their surfaces. Jadis remembered Tegwyn had called the plant “fool’s supper” though she wasn’t sure why it had been given such an odd name.

“These grew way faster than expected,” Jay said as she tapped one of the gourds. “Faster than the sunbloods.”

“Yes, but my magic made the difference there,” Tegwyn said as he rose to his full height, happily displaying the large yellow fruit he had in hand for Jay to see. “Sorcha’s plants grew so fast with no help from my spells at all. To me, that is far more impressive!”

“Are these ready to eat?” Jay asked as she took the proffered melon from the Dryad and examined its warty rind.

“Yes, though they are not for any of us,” Tegwyn said as he picked up the armful of gourds and walked towards the far end of the greenhouse. “If you were to eat any of the sweet fruit inside, you would quickly find yourself suffering from severe cramps and quite a lot of bowel troubles.”

“Ah. That explains the name.”

“Yes, it does!” Tegwyn grinned. “Fortunately, there is one here who thrives on fruits such as these.”

The cheerful Dryad came to a stop in front of the large wooden box filled with dark soil and compost that took up the far back corner of the greenhouse. There were actually two compost heaps in the space, one that was set up in a more normal fashion, and the other with a mesh lid built into the top. Lifting the lid, Tegwyn set the gourds down into the soil.

“Sorcha my friend, would you mind calling for Rolo? He likes you, best.”

“Rolo?” Jay raised an eyebrow at the new name.

“Yeah, well, just calling him ‘Grubby’ all the time was stupid,” Sorcha mumbled as she stepped up a conveniently placed stepstool so she could lean over the edge of the wooden wall. “It’s like naming a dog ‘Doggy’ or a cat ‘Kitty’ or whatever. Doesn’t feel like a proper name.”

“Alright,” Jay laughed at the goblin’s explanation. “If you say so.”

Thumping her hands against the top of the soil, Sorcha kept up a constant rhythmic patter for several seconds. After maybe half a minute, Jay saw some of the soil move as a large lump rose up out of the compost.

“Come here Rolo, you fat bug,” Sorcha said as the dirt rose in a slow wave towards her thumping palms. “Come eat your treats.”

Jay watched in amused fascination as the Guardian Soul Grub Villthyrial had gifted her burrowed up out of the compost heap. The magic beast was quite the oddity in her opinion. On the one hand, the creature sparkled like a jewel, its emerald color shining like a star. On the other hand, it was a literal grub that lived in the dirt. It managed to be both beautiful and ugly at the same time, which tended to put a lot of her lovers off from the strange insect. Fortunately, Sorcha didn’t mind how the bug looked at all, which was good since she had a skill that specifically helped her maintain the health of beneficial insects, which the soul grub certainly counted as. It was also good that Sorcha got along well with the grub, since it was now getting close to her size.

“How much does he weigh now?” Jay asked as the giant grub crawled out of the soil and wriggled its way between the goblin’s hands. “He looks like he’s close to three feet long now.”

“About sixty pounds,” Sorcha said as she scratched the grub’s emerald skin with her nails. “Too big for me to lift anymore. Big dumb bug tried to climb on top of me the other day and I almost fell over.”

“He grows more every day,” Tegwyn said with a smile as he used his bare hands to split one of the gourds open. “I would say that Rolo is quite the happy and healthy fellow.”

“And this stuff is good for him?” Jay tapped the melon in her hand.

“Per Old Tom’s instructions, these gourds should be excellent for the development of plant-eating magic beasts.”

“Then I hope he likes them,” Jay said as she also split open the fool’s supper with her hands.

The insides were a lot like a watermelon, but with light purple flesh instead of red. The smell coming from the melon was sweet and a little tangy, nice enough that Jadis was tempted to give it a taste. But since she didn’t have any desire to shit herself to death, she restrained herself and simply offered a piece to the green grub curled up in front of Sorcha.

“Here you go, Rolo,” Jay said as she held a big slice of melon up to the soul grub’s mandibles. “Eat up so you can grow big and strong.”

With surprising speed, the magic insect darted its head forward and devoured the piece of melon. Of course, speed was relative. Even moving at its fastest, Jadis was pretty sure a determined snail could outpace the fat bug. But in no time at all, the piece of melon was gone, rind and all.

“I think he likes it,” Jay grinned as Rolo shuffled around in the dirt looking for more of the tasty treat.

“Over here,” Sorcha thumped the ground and led the grub to the pile of melons. “That’s it. Gods, I hope you aren’t going to turn into some kind of giant magical boar or something else like that. No idea how we’d keep up feeding you.”

As Jadis watched the big grub eat, she heard Kerr’s voice calling out to her from outside of the greenhouse. The momentary break from the busy day apparently over, she told the two gardeners a hasty goodbye before quickly exiting the building to see what was going on in the storage yard.

Kerr and Thea had shown up in the company of a large wagon loaded with fresh lumber, followed by a second wagon that was filled with bolts of wool cloth. Jadis immediately recognized the man driving the first wagon as Vikwas, Aila’s father.

“Help us unload all of this shit!” Kerr shouted at Jay when she saw her exit the greenhouse. “We’ve got more on the way!”

Jay jogged over to help offload the heavy supplies, greeting the reserved older man as she neared the wagon.

“Hey Vikwas, how are you doing? How’s Senta?”

“Well,” Vikwas replied mildly as he got off the wagon to help. “Senta is adjusting.”

Adjusting. Jadis had a good idea of what that meant. Ever since the attack on the city, Aila had convinced her parents to move from their little home in the village of Red Tree to the capital. The reasoning being, Aila was worried that her parents might be targeted by cultists due to their relation to her and Jadis. Since the two had been seen in their company by many, Jadis could understand the concern. Having all of Jadis’ lovers’ families move into the city was something they had been discussing on and off for a while, though only Aila’s parents had done so thus far.

“Is she not getting along well with Einer and Svana?” Jay asked as she started pulling lumber off the back of the wagon.

“She keeps trying to clean. The maids won’t let her. It’s caused some strife.”

“Ah.”

Vikwas and Svana had moved into the manor house of Eir’s noble parents. It was the safest place for them, since it guaranteed good security, but Jadis could easily understand how a woman like Senta would have trouble getting used to such a drastic change in lifestyle.

Jadis unloaded the lumber in companionable silence with her unofficial father-in-law for several minutes, making quick work of the job while Kerr and Thea unloaded the other wagon. By the time they were done offloading the shipment, another wagon had shown up bearing even more supplies that were needed for the alchemical concoctions Sabina used to fabricate the black paint that went on the wool. As she turned to go help with that newest wagonload, Jay was stopped by Vikwas clearing his throat.

“Do you have any advice,” he asked somewhat hesitantly, “on how to… cheer Senta up?”

Jay gave Vikwas a confused look. The man looked uncomfortable, like he was ashamed to be asking her the question. Considering what she knew of both him and Senta, she guessed that the quiet man had been unable to help Senta’s transition into their new life and was probably unhappy that he was asking someone so much younger for advice.

“You know Senta better than I do,” Jay said as she leaned against the side of the wagon with one elbow. “Probably better than anyone else in the world. What advice could I give you that you don’t already know?”

Vikwas shrugged his broad shoulders, his expression one of helplessness.

“Look, I’m not going to pry into your relationship,” Jay lowered her voice to make sure no one else would easily overhear. “But when was the last time you took Senta out on a date? I mean, I know you two have been married for decades, but that doesn’t mean you stop taking the love of your life out on the town, right? My parents always went out on dates, so they had a great relationship. Maybe you just need to give Senta a little more of your time?”

Vikwas looked thoughtful for a moment before giving Jay a single nod.

“Thanks,” he grunted quietly, his mind clearly already elsewhere.

Jay patted the big man on the shoulder as she walked away, giving him space to think. Grabbing a crate from the third wagon, she carried the heavy box over to Sabina’s workshop. As soon as she neared the door, Dys opened it and took the box to carry the crate inside in a perfectly timed and coordinated maneuver that reminded Jadis of one of the reasons it was so nice to have more than one body. Before she had taken more than a step away, however, another voice called out to Jay.

“Here, let me help,” Violetta said as she jogged up next to Jay. “I have another hour before I have to add more clamshell powder to the crucible.”

“Thanks,” Jay smiled at the younger woman. “This shouldn’t take that long to unload.”

As they worked to get everything into the workshop, Violetta gave Jay a curious look.

“Why are you smiling like that?”

“Hm? Oh,” Jay shook her head. “It’s nothing. I’ve had three different people ask me for advice on love-related topics. I was just thinking about how weird that was.”

The purple-skinned apprentice frowned in thought before tilting her head to one side.

“Is it that weird? You’re an avatar of the goddess of love. Aren’t you who people are supposed to talk to when they’ve got questions about love stuff?”

“Well, when you put it like that…” Jay mused as she passed another crate to her Dys self. “I guess it’s not too surprising. I’m just not used to people actually asking me for advice. When I go to the temples, the priests do all the talking, not me. Most of the questions people usually ask me are more along the lines of ‘why are you doing that?’ and ‘what made you think that was a good idea?’ and stuff like that. It’s weird to get asked ‘good’ questions, I guess.”

Violetta laughed at Jadis’ explanation, her white teeth shining as she grinned.

“Well, I hope you keep getting good questions. Sounds like you needed a few.”

Jadis couldn’t help but agree. She wasn’t sure if she was the best person in the world to give advice to others, but she did like helping people. If she was able to make a few people’s lives better by answering a few easy questions, then she was happy to spend the time doing so.

It was while Jadis was feeling pretty good about the answers to the questions she had given thus far that day that Sabina managed to catch her completely off guard with another unexpected question.

“Hey Dys, what do you think about having sex with Violetta?”

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