Chapter 3: Chapter 2: The Thermodynamics of Bathtime

For the next three days, Arthur von Pendelton did nothing but sit by his new window.

To the maids, he looked like a porcelain doll lost in thought, perhaps contemplating the beauty of the gardens. They cooed over him, whispering about how the Young Master was clearly a poet in the making.

In reality, Arthur was collecting data.

He watched the sun move across the sky to calculate the optimal angle for solar heating. He watched the gardeners haul water from the well, counting their steps, the spillage rate, and the time lost to gossip.

Inefficient, Arthur thought, sipping warm milk. The caloric expenditure of the staff is roughly 40% higher than necessary due to poor logistics.

His peaceful data collection was interrupted by the dread of every 6-year-old: Bath Time.

“Come along, Young Master!” chirped Marie, the head maid. She was a stout, kindly woman who could lift an ox but treated Arthur like he was made of spun sugar.

Arthur sighed. He didn’t mind being clean. He minded the process.

He was marched into the bathing chamber. It was a stone room, cold and echoing. In the center sat a wooden tub.

The nightmare began.

First, a parade of three junior maids entered, lugging heavy wooden buckets of steaming water. They heaved them into the tub. Splash. Then they walked all the way back to the kitchen, which was on the other side of the manor, to get more.

Arthur watched the steam rising from the tub.

[Observation Active: Fluid Dynamics and Thermal Decay.] [Calculation: By the time the third bucket arrives, the first bucket has lost 12 degrees of heat. The resulting mixture will be lukewarm.]

“Marie,” Arthur said, standing on a stool so he could look her in the eye. “This system is unsustainable. The latency between water retrieval and water utilization is too high.”

Marie blinked, dipping a cloth into the water. “It’s just a bath, sweetie. Look, I brought the lavender soap you like!”

“The friction coefficient of that cloth is akin to sandpaper,” Arthur noted, but allowed himself to be placed in the water.

It was, as predicted, lukewarm.

Arthur shivered. It wasn’t just uncomfortable; it was a sanitary risk. Water below a certain temperature didn’t effectively kill bacteria. He sat there, a small, brooding genius surrounded by bubbles, and made a decision.

I need copper. A lot of copper.

The next morning, Arthur escaped the nursery.

Escaping was easy. He simply told the guards he wished to inspect the structural integrity of the stables. The guards, used to the eccentricities of the “Genius Young Master,” just nodded and followed him at a respectful distance.

He didn’t go to the stables. He went to the Smithy.

The Pendelton estate had its own forge, run by a dwarf named Hammerhead (a nickname, presumably, though Arthur hadn’t verified the shape of his skull).

The forge was loud, hot, and smelled of sulfur. Arthur took a deep breath. Smells like progress.

Hammerhead was hammering a dented breastplate. He stopped when he saw the small boy in velvet clothes standing in the doorway.

“Young Master?” The dwarf grunted, wiping soot from his brow. “Did you get lost? This ain’t a place for soft hands.”

Arthur walked up to the anvil. He was barely taller than the dwarf’s knees. He pulled a piece of parchment from his pocket. He had drawn it with charcoal from the fireplace.

“Master Dwarf,” Arthur said, his voice serious. “I require piping. Hollow cylinders of copper. Diameter: 2 inches. Thickness: 0.5 centimeters.”

Hammerhead squinted at the drawing. “Pipes? What for? You making a flute?”

“And a boiler,” Arthur continued, ignoring the question. He pointed to the second drawing. It was a schematic for a pressure vessel with a safety valve. “I need you to cast this in iron. It must withstand high internal pressure. If the welding is weak, it will explode and take the east wing of the manor with it.”

The dwarf’s eyes went wide. “Explode? Young Master, are… are you building a bomb?”

Arthur paused. He realized that explaining ’pressurized hot water systems’ might be too complex. He needed to speak their language.

“I am building…” Arthur searched for a word. “…A Dragon’s Lung.”

Hammerhead gasped. “A weapon to mimic the breath of a dragon?”

“Technically, yes,” Arthur lied. “It creates steam and heat. I need it to conquer… the cold.”

The dwarf slammed his fist on the anvil. “Aye! That’s the spirit of the Iron Duke’s son! Conquer the cold! I’ll do it, lad. I’ve never made a ’Dragon’s Lung’ before, but if it helps us in the coming winter wars, I’ll forge it!”

[Social Interaction Result: Success (Task Failed Successfully).] [Relationship with Blacksmith: +20 (Respect).]

Arthur nodded. “Excellent. I also need joints. Elbows and T-junctions. Do not deviate from the measurements, or the seal will fail.”

For the next week, the estate was in a state of confusion.

The servants whispered. They saw the Young Master running back and forth between the Smithy and the bathhouse, covered in soot, holding strange copper tubes.

“Is he building a new torture device?” one guard asked. “I heard he’s building a tunnel to the capital,” another whispered.

Duke Kaelen was thrilled. He watched from the window as Arthur instructed three strong men on how to dig a trench from the kitchen’s large hearth to the bathhouse.

“Look at him, Elena!” The Duke beamed. “He understands trench warfare! He’s preparing defenses!”

“He’s laying pipes, Kaelen,” the Duchess said, though she looked equally impressed. “He’s very focused.”

Arthur was indeed focused. He had a problem. Gaskets.

Medieval manufacturing lacked rubber. Metal-on-metal joints would leak. He stood in the trench, holding two copper pipes, frustrated.

[Problem Detected: Leakage Risk.] [Heaven-Defying Understanding Active.] [Scanning Available Materials…]

Arthur looked around. He saw a leather worker repairing a saddle nearby. He saw a pot of beeswax used for sealing letters.

Leather soaked in wax, Arthur realized. Compressed.

He grabbed a scrap of leather, ran to the hot wax pot, dipped it, and let it cool slightly. He placed it between the two pipes and tightened the screw-flange he had designed.

It held.

[Item Created: Primitive Gasket.] [Engineering XP: +150]

Finally, it was done.

The boiler was installed behind the kitchen fireplace, utilizing the wasted heat from the cooking fires (efficiency!). The pipes ran through the wall, into the bathhouse, and connected to a strange copper faucet Arthur had installed over the tub.

It was time for the test run.

Marie, the Head Maid, stood by the tub, looking terrified of the copper monstrosity. The Duke and Duchess were present, along with the head guard and Hammerhead the dwarf.

“Prepare yourselves,” Arthur announced, standing by the faucet. He looked like a commander about to launch a missile. “Initiating thermal transfer.”

He turned the handle.

There was a clanking sound. Then a hiss. The pipes shuddered. Hammerhead stepped in front of the Duke, shield raised, expecting an explosion.

Sputter. Hiss.

And then… a steady, steaming stream of crystal-clear hot water poured from the faucet into the tub.

Silence filled the room. No one moved.

“Water…” Marie whispered. “Water… that walks through walls?”

Arthur checked the temperature with a finger. “42 degrees Celsius. Acceptable.”

He turned to his parents. “Father. Mother. The manual labor of hauling buckets is abolished. We now have… tap water.”

The Duke stared at the faucet. He walked over, touched the hot water, and pulled his hand back in shock. Then, he looked at Arthur with an expression of absolute, terrifying awe.

“It’s infinite,” the Duke breathed. “Hot water… on command. Do you know what this means?”

Arthur nodded. “Hygiene.”

“No!” The Duke roared, picking Arthur up and spinning him around. “It means we can wash the mud off the soldiers faster than any army in the world! Our troops will never be cold! Arthur, you possess the strategic mind of a god!”

Arthur bobbed in his father’s grip. “I just wanted a warm bath.”

“And you shall have it!” The Duke yelled. “Everyone out! The genius needs to soak!”

As the room cleared, Arthur finally climbed into the tub. He sank into the hot water, letting out a long, happy sigh.

Civilization, he thought, closing his eyes.

[Achievement Unlocked: The First Plumber.] [Global Impact: Minor. (For now).] [Mana Analysis Update: You have realized that Water Mana could be used to pressurize the system without a boiler. Blueprint Updating…]

Arthur opened one eye. Magic pumps? Now that… that has potential.

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