Chapter 114: Complicated Truths

After Jasmine had repeated her confession and kissed me again, recreating the same scene from her first declaration in another office room, I stood there for a long moment in the silence that followed her departure. The taste of her lips still lingered on min along her words: “I won’t give up on you.”

What was I even supposed to say to that kind of determined declaration? Should I simply tell her that she needed to forget about me because I’d started something with Sydney? The problem was that even I wasn’t entirely sure what my relationship with Sydney actually was, or where it was headed.

Here I’d thought everyone in the Municipal Office believed Sydney and I were officially together, but it seemed Jasmine wasn’t convinced by our public displays of closeness. And if I was being honest with myself, she had good reason for her skepticism. There were definite reservations between Sydney and me—we weren’t acting like an open, committed couple should be acting, even though Sydney was undeniably affectionate around me.

The fault for that ambiguity probably lay with me. Sydney wasn’t officially my girlfriend, so I couldn’t just act as though she was, no matter how much chemistry existed between us. And maybe, deep down, the hesitation came from my complicated feelings for Rachel and Elena as well. The truth was that I loved all of them in ways that went far beyond simple friendship or survival partnership after all.

“I really am a scumbag,” I muttered to the empty office, running my hands through my dark hair.

“Are you?”

I flinched as Sydney’s head appeared around the doorframe, her characteristic grin suggesting she’d been eavesdropping for some time. Her enhanced hearing abilities meant she could probably monitor conversations from much farther away than normal humans, which raised uncomfortable questions about exactly how much she’d overheard.

“Did you hear all of that?” I asked, feeling heat creep up my neck as I imagined her listening to Jasmine’s passionate declaration and my own confused muttering.

“Heard everything,” she confirmed with a smirk and clearly amused. “Even the part where she said we don’t act like a real couple. I have to admit, I was quite hurt by that observation.”

She entered the office fully and closed the door behind her.

“Well, she isn’t exactly wrong about that assessment,” I replied, trying to maintain some emotional distance even as my body responded to her proximity.

“Why do you think that is?” Sydney asked, moving closer until she was within arm’s reach. “I mean, we’re not officially a couple, and neither you and Rachel are in any kind of formal relationship and in fact officially, that might be accurate,” she continued, “but unofficially, I really feel like I’m in a relationship with you. I’m sure Rachel feels the same way, or at least wishes things could develop in that direction.”

“What are you saying? Despite knowing that I can’t be faithful to any one person? What about you—how do you feel about that reality?”

Sydney smiled. “I think you’ve gone way past worrying about traditional faithfulness, don’t you think, Ryan?”

Her observation hit closer to truth than I was comfortable acknowledging. I averted my gaze awkwardly.

Sydney seemed to interpret my silence as confirmation of her assessment. She moved behind the office chair I was standing near and gave me a gentle push that sent me falling backward into the seat. Before I could protest or stand up again, she settled herself on my lap.

“Sydney, this really isn’t the right moment for—” I started to object, but she placed a finger against my lips to silence me.

“Shush,” she said softly, wrapping her arms around my neck. “What do you feel right now, Ryan?”

The question was simple, but the answer was complicated by the physical reality of her body pressed against mine. “Hot,” I admitted honestly, feeling my temperature rising as her presence triggered responses I couldn’t entirely control.

“Good. Now close your eyes,” she said, reaching up to gently press her fingers against my eyelids.

I complied with her request, settling into darkness while remaining acutely aware of her weight on my lap and the scent of her skin so close to mine.

“Now imagine Rachel instead of me,” she whispered, her voice taking on a hypnotic quality that seemed designed to bypass my conscious defenses. “How do you feel?”

The mental image came easily—Rachel’s gentle smile, her green eyes full of understanding. “The same,” I admitted quietly.

“What about Elena?” Sydney asked, and something about her whisper made it sound almost like Elena’s voice, creating an auditory illusion that made my pulse quicken.

I gulped, feeling my heartbeat accelerate as I imagined Elena on my lap. “Yes, the same.”

“What about Cindy?” Sydney asked, and this time she punctuated the question by licking my ear in a gesture that sent electric shocks through my nervous system.

The memory of my recent night with Cindy flooded back—her shy enthusiasm, her genuine affection, the way she’d worn the sapphire necklace like a declaration of connection between us. My heartbeat skipped as guilt and desire warred in my chest.

I hesitated to voice the truth, knowing that admitting it would make my emotional complications even more explicit.

“Be honest about your feelings, Ryan,” Sydney encouraged, her voice dropping to that intimate whisper. “Nobody else is around to hear your deepest thoughts. Only I’m here, and I won’t tell anyone what you say. So tell me the truth.”

“Y…yes, the same,” I replied finally, burying my guilt beneath the weight of honest acknowledgment.

“What about Alisha then?” She continued, apparently determined to map the full extent of my complicated attractions.

“W…What?” I asked, startled by the inclusion of Elena’s twin sister in this psychological inventory.

“Liu Mei? Jasmine?” Sydney pressed on, her voice taking on a teasing quality. “Imagine them sitting on your lap right now, kissing you and rubbing themselves against you like I’m doing.”

As she spoke, she began moving against me in subtle ways that made my physical response immediate. My arousal became embarrassingly obvious, and panic flooded through me as I realized how completely she was demonstrating her point about my scattered attractions.

“Wait, Sydney!” I snapped my eyes open, my face burning with embarrassment as I found her grinning face just inches from mine.

“Such a naughty guy you are, Ryan,” she said with obvious satisfaction, clearly pleased by the reaction she’d provoked.

“I… I…” I felt my expression fall as shame washed over me. The evidence of my physical response to her psychological game was there all erected, and I couldn’t find words to explain or justify what had just happened.

But Sydney lifted my chin with gentle fingers and kissed me tenderly, her lips soft and understanding rather than judgmental. “Hmm,” she murmured against my mouth before pulling back slightly. “Don’t worry, I don’t mind or care about any of this, and I won’t judge you for having completely natural feelings. All the girls you’ve been intimate with in our group are happy, can’t you see that?”

I didn’t know how to respond to her reassurance. While it was true that Rachel, Elena, Cindy, and Sydney all seemed content with our current arrangement, that didn’t necessarily mean they would accept the prospect of being part of some kind of formalized polygamous relationship structure.

“If you hesitate too long, you may end up with serious regrets later, Ryan,” Sydney continued, her voice holding a note of gentle warning. “And regrets are very painful to carry.”

I studied her face in the dim office lighting, looking at her sincere gaze. “What are you suggesting, exactly?”

“I’m suggesting that you stop torturing yourself over having completely normal human emotions,” she replied, settling more comfortably on my lap. “The world ended, Ryan. All the old rules about relationships and social expectations died along with everything else. We’re building new ways of living, new ways of caring for each other, new ways of finding happiness in circumstances nobody could have imagined.”

“But what about jealousy?” I asked. “What about hurt feelings and complicated group function? What happens when someone decides they want exclusive commitment, or when new people join our group and change everything?”

Sydney was quiet for several moments. “I guess you have points,” she admitted finally. “But they’re not insurmountable problems. Lots of people throughout history have managed complex relationship structures successfully. It requires communication, honesty, and genuine care for everyone’s wellbeing, but it’s definitely possible.”

She shifted her position slightly, creating more comfortable seating while maintaining the intimate atmosphere that had developed between us. “The key is making sure everyone feels valued and included. Nobody gets left behind or treated as less important than anyone else. Everyone’s needs and feelings matter equally.”

The concept sounded idealistic when stated so simply, but I could see the logical framework underlying her suggestion. Our survival group had already developed into something resembling an extended family, with emotional bonds that went far beyond mere partnership for mutual protection. Perhaps it wasn’t such a leap to imagine those bonds developing into something more formally romantic and intimate.

“What about the people who don’t know about my abilities yet?” I asked. “Daisy, Ivy, Liu Mei, Rebecca—they still think the enhancements some of you have developed came from simple contact with. If they found out that intimate contact with me was what actually triggered those changes…”

“Then we tell them the truth when the time is right,” Sydney replied with characteristic directness. “Secrets have a way of coming out eventually anyway, and it’s usually better to control how that revelation happens rather than letting people discover things by accident.”

Her practical approach to what I’d been viewing as an insurmountable problem was both impressive and slightly idealistic however.

Regardless; Sydney had apparently given this situation much more thought than I’d realized, and she’d reached conclusions that were far more decisive than my own conflicted hesitations.

“You really think this could work?” I asked, looking at her maybe hopefully to get a positive answer.

“I think it’s already working,” she replied shrugging her shoulders. “We just haven’t acknowledged it officially yet. Rachel loves you. Elena’s feelings are pretty obvious to anyone who pays attention to how she looks at you. Cindy is practically glowing since your night together. And I’m sitting on your lap in an office at the Municipal Building, discussing the possibility of a polyamorous relationship structure.”

When she laid it out like that, the evidence was pretty compelling….

“What about the others?” I asked. “Jasmine, for instance. She made it pretty clear that she’s interested in joining whatever this is.”

Sydney’s expression grew more thoughtful as she considered the implications of expanding beyond our established group. “That’s more complicated,” she admitted. “She may not be as accepting as me, or Rachel about it I mean if you accept her feelings but in that case you will have to tell about the four other women involved.”

“Right…but I have no intentions of giving a positive answer to Jasmine…”

It wasn’t the right moment and I wasn’t horny enough to add more women in the mess when I hadn’t dealt with the current ones.

“One step at a time,” Sydney suggested, apparently reading my thoughts. “First, we figure out how to make things work with the people who are already part of our family. Once we have that foundation stable, we can consider whether expanding makes sense.”

Expanding…

She was clearly thinking in the future, I might fall for more women, I mean she wasn’t wrong thinking that how easily I fell for the ones I had sex with and in the future I will have eventually again sex because of my ability to cure Infections so yeah, I couldn’t deny her words.

“In the meantime,” Sydney continued, “you need to stop feeling guilty about having feelings for multiple people. It doesn’t make you a bad person—it makes you human. And in our current circumstances, having strong emotional connections with multiple people might actually be healthier and more sustainable than trying to force yourself into traditional monogamous patterns.”

“Now, I think you’re exaggerating,” I muttered. “If anything, it could implode if we’re not careful. Right now, it’s fine because nothing’s official, but if that changes… I don’t know if things between the girls will ever stay the same.”

Sydney tilted her head, lips curling into a soft, almost pitying smile. “Ha… Ryan, you and your negativity never fail to surprise me,” she sighed. Then her hand slid, casual, resting right over the swelling bulge in my pants. The heat of her palm pulsed through the fabric, and my body betrayed me instantly.

“Sydney.”

“What is it, Ryan? Don’t you want your little brother to calm down?” Her smirk widened as her hand gave the gentlest press.

“It’ll calm down soon enough if you just leave him alone,” I managed through clenched teeth.

“Really?” She whispered, leaning close until her breath brushed hot against my ear. “But I don’t want to leave him alone.” Her lips brushed my cheek, feather-light, before she kissed it fully, letting the softness linger.

A shiver ran the length of my spine, and before I realized what I was doing, my arms tightened around her waist, pulling her further into my lap. Her pants rode up as she perched on me, her thighs hugging my hips.

“Let’s see how he’s doing,” she purred, slipping her fingers into my waistband.

My breath came out as her hand glided past the fabric, down over my pubis, until finally her soft fingers wrapped around my cock.

“Syd… Sydney, wait,” I gasped, my voice stuttering. “Someone could catch us—”

Her hand stroked me once and I nearly buckled.

“Well, that would only confirm their suspicions about us,” she murmured with wicked delight.

“That’s not the prob—ohh…” My protest dissolved into a groan as her thumb rolled lazily over the slick head of my cock. My hips twitched up into her hand, desperate for more.

“Just enjoy it,” she whispered, sealing her words with a kiss.

I kissed her back, hungry, already addicted to the taste of her lips, the faint sweetness clinging to them. My mouth opened, her tongue teasing mine, and her muffled moan vibrated straight down into my core.

“Hmmh~” Sydney’s whimper was shaky, almost as if my arousal fueled hers, and all the while her hand worked me, pumping against the tight confines of my pants. The friction was maddening, my cock throbbing, swelling hotter by the second.

Her fingers grazed lower, cupping my balls, massaging gently while stroking me with her palm. Sparks shot up my spine and my rational thoughts shattered like glass, leaving only one raw urge. I groaned against her lips and, without thinking, pushed up from the wheelchair, lifting her easily. Her gasp melted into a giggle as her legs wrapped around my waist, locking me to her.

“This is bad… really bad,” I panted, breath ragged against her neck as I staggered toward the desk.

Sydney’s cheeks glowed crimson, but her eyes sparkled with heat. She pulled her hand free, leaving me aching and wet with her touch. “That’s what makes it so exciting,” she teased.

I shoved the chair out of the way, setting her down on the desk. Papers slid to the floor right after. My hand went straight to my belt, fumbling, desperate to free myself, when—

The door creaked open.

“What are you two doing?”

I froze, hand still on my pants, my heart crashing in my chest. I turned, throat dry, and there stood Rebecca in the doorway.

“N… nothing,” I blurted, voice strained, fumbling to compose myself.

Her eyes narrowed, flicking from my flushed face to Sydney on the desk. Sydney crossed her legs smoothly, masking her frustration with a sharp look. “We’re just looking for something useful,” she said coolly, though her voice carried the faint edge of annoyance.

Rebecca stepped inside, scanning the room with suspicion, her gaze darting back to us more than once. “Did either of you see my sister?”

“Y… yeah. I mean, wasn’t she with Clara?” I said, moving quickly past her into the corridor, desperate to put distance between myself and Sydney before the last of my control snapped.

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