Chapter 326: I’m not her

E’s POV

I let out a shaky sigh, my chest rising and falling as if the air itself suddenly started to feel heavier than before. My eyes drifted from Irina to Penelope, then back again. They were both staring at me like they were waiting for something, an answer, or an explanation, but I had nothing to give them yet.

“Can you help me get up?” I asked quietly. My voice was scratchy, and softer than I meant it to be, but also steady enough. “I need to see what I look like by myself before I say anything else.”

Irina frowned at me, her lips pressed into a thin line. “Are you sure you want to do that now? You’ve only just woken up, and again, your legs might be too weak to move.”

“I don’t care,” I said firmly. “Juts try, please. Once I see for myself… then I’ll try to explain, but I can’t, not until I know exactly what’s going on.”

The three of them looked at each other, silent. I could tell from their faces that they thought I was pushing myself too much. Roxana, especially, looked ready to argue, but she didn’t. She just folded her arms and raised an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed.

Finally, Irina sighed, a small nod following. “Alright, if that’s what you want.”

Penelope stepped forward with her usual energy, though there was still worry on her face. “Then let’s do it together. Just lean on us, okay?”

I nodded.

Irina moved to one side of me, Penelope to the other, and both their hands were warm when they slipped under my arms, lifting me carefully. The first movement sent a wave of dizziness through me, and for a moment I thought I’d sink back down, but I forced myself to stay upright. My body trembled with the effort.

“Easy,” Penelope murmured. “Don’t rush it.”

“I’ve got her,” Irina added, her tone calm.

Together they managed to get me sitting on the edge of the bed, and my heart was pounding already even though I hadn’t even stood yet.

“You really don’t have to…” Penelope started again, but I cut her off with a shake of my head.

“I need to see this.”

They didn’t argue after that.

Each of them took one of my hands, their grips steady, and I let them pull me upward, my legs wobbling the moment they carried my weight. The floor felt too far away, like I was walking on air. My knees almost buckled, but both of them tightened their holds, keeping me upright.

Step by step, we moved slowly across the room. Roxana followed behind us, her arms still crossed, and her eyes watching everything. She didn’t say a word, but I could feel the doubt radiating off her.

It felt like forever, but at last we reached the far side of the room, where a full-length mirror stood against the wall. My chest tightened when I saw myself, and my breath caught in my throat again. For some reason, I was feeling nervous at the idea of confirming that I no longer looked like Electra but like myself.

Irina and Penelope steadied me right in front of it, and the moment I forced myself to lift my eyes, I froze.

The girl staring back at me didn’t look like what I looked like in my human form at all, and just like I expected, what I saw in front of me was myself in my phoenix form in full.

My skin gave off a faint glow, streaked with shades of red and gold just under the surface; lines of fire curled up my arms and across my face, while my hair spilled over my shoulders, still blonde, but because it was shining as if each strand held a tiny flame, it looked more orange. My eyes were still blue, only a bit brighter than their usual color.

I gasped quietly, my hands trembling in Irina’s and Penelope’s grips.

The only thing missing was my wings. Without them, the reflection looked a little strange, but there was no denying that I was standing here fully in phoenix form.

Penelope’s grip on my hand tightened. “See?” she whispered, like she thought I might faint.

I couldn’t look away from the mirror, and my throat felt dry. “This is what you’ve been seeing all this time?”

Irina nodded. “Yes, since the tournament.”

I shook my head slowly, staring hard at my reflection. This wasn’t right, this wasn’t how things worked. I couldn’t just wake up one day as a full phoenix, not without Electra deciding to shift, something that had never happened since we were supposed to stay hidden.

I pressed a trembling hand to my chest, right over the glow that pulsed there. My eyes stayed on my reflection as I whispered, “She has to be here. Electra has to be somewhere inside me.”

Penelope blinked at me. “Electra? What do you mean?”

I shut my eyes for a second, willing myself not to fall apart. My voice cracked as I said, “I can’t just… change. I can’t go from looking human and normal to being this without Electra. It doesn’t make sense. She’s still here, I know she is. I just… I can’t reach her.”

No one said anything after my words, and I wasn’t surprised since I knew they’d be confused. I opened my eyes again, staring at my reflection and wondering what in the world was happening.

Irina’s hand squeezed mine. “Electra,” she said gently, her tone careful, like she was afraid of breaking me further. “You’re still you, even like this. It’s just you in your other form, but it’s still you.”

I let out a sigh, staring at my reflection in the mirror before turning to Irina. My voice came out low.

“You don’t understand,” I said. “Right now, I’m not really Electra, and I’m being serious when I say I can’t reach her.”

Irina’s eyes narrowed in confusion. Penelope blinked at me like I had just said the craziest thing in the world. From the mirror, I saw Roxana frown a little, her arms still crossed.

“What are you talking about?” Roxana asked.

I stayed quiet for a few seconds, trying to put the right words together, but my thoughts felt messy. How was I supposed to explain this to them? I have never been good at dealing with humans and have never even spoken to them directly like this, but I couldn’t keep this from them either.

They needed to know, and maybe they could even help me figure it out.

I let out another sigh. “I know this sounds strange,” I said. “But let me explain as simply as I can. Electra and I share one body, and although we’re one body, we’re also two minds and two different sides.”

The room went quiet.

“Electra is the human side,” I went on slowly. “And me… I’m the phoenix side. I even have my own name, which is E, and before you ask, I decided on a name so we’d not get confused.”

Penelope’s mouth dropped open, and she stared at me like I had just grown horns. Irina stayed still, her face unreadable, while Roxana only frowned deeper.

“I know it sounds crazy, but it’s the truth, and right now,” I said, lowering my eyes, “I can’t reach her. I can’t even feel her. It’s like she’s gone silent inside me, and I don’t know why.”

For a long moment, nobody said anything, and the silence made me feel slightly uncomfortable.

Penelope finally spoke up. “Wait… are you saying there are two of you in Electra’s body?”

“Well, something like that,” I answered simply.

“That makes no sense,” Roxana said, her voice flat.

I looked at her reflection in the mirror. “I know it doesn’t, but it’s true. I’ve been here ever since I was awakened, but you just couldn’t see me before. You only knew Electra because she was the one in control most of the time, while I stayed quiet, but now…”

I pressed a hand to my chest, and my voice softened. “Now I can’t feel her, and I don’t know what happened.”

Irina’s voice came out calm but firm. “And you expect us to believe this?”

I nodded. “I don’t expect you to believe it right away. I barely understand it myself, but this is the truth. Electra is your friend. You know her, and well, as for me… I’m the side you weren’t supposed to see.”

Source: Webnovel.com, updated by NovelKeep