Chapter 399: Alone and Lonely

Seraphina’s POV

I was having a bad day, and I didn’t need anyone to tell me why. I already knew exactly who was responsible for it.

Electra.

Everything about this morning, from the moment I opened my eyes to the moment I turned away from her and walked out of her room, had been a mess, and the more I thought about it, the more it felt like my chest was being squeezed from the inside. It wasn’t just what she had done, it was how she had done it, like it didn’t matter, like I didn’t matter.

She had left in the middle of the night, walked all the way to the palace, put herself in danger, and didn’t even think to wake me up or tell me where she was going, even though I had been right there beside her, and then when she came back, she acted like it was nothing, like it was just another normal night, like she hadn’t just risked her life.

That alone would have been enough to upset me, but what made it worse was how completely unbothered she had been by my reaction. It had been hours since I stormed out of her room, and not once had she come looking for me. Not once had she knocked on my door, or tried to explain herself, or even checked if I was okay.

It was like I had never left at all, like my absence didn’t change anything for her. I had already known, deep down, that this version of Electra wouldn’t come after me. This Electra didn’t love me. She didn’t remember anything we had been, anything we had shared, so why would she care that I was upset? Why would she try to fix something she didn’t even think was broken?

But knowing that didn’t make it hurt any less. If anything, it made it worse. Because it meant that this was real, that this was how things were going to be now. I wasn’t dealing with the Electra I knew anymore. I was dealing with someone who looked like her, sounded like her, and touched me like her but felt nothing for me at all, and I hated how much that thought affected me, how much it stayed in my head no matter how hard I tried to push it away.

I lay on my bed, staring at the wall, trying to ignore the tight feeling in my chest, but it didn’t go away. It only got worse the more I let my thoughts wander. Coming to terms with the fact that I might never get the Electra who loved me back was something I wasn’t ready for, no matter how many times I told myself to accept it. I had been holding onto hope, even if I didn’t want to admit it, hoping that somehow her memories would come back and everything would return to normal, but now, after everything that had happened, that hope felt weaker than ever.

The worst part was how alone I felt.

I didn’t have anyone to talk to, not here and not back home. In Elysium, most people either ignored me or looked down on me, and the few people who didn’t were only around me because of Electra. Back in Aldoria, I didn’t have a family I could call and talk to, no one who would listen and understand. The only person I had leaned on since coming here, the only person who had somehow become my emotional support, was Electra. My bully turned lover, and the one person who had made this place feel less suffocating.

And now she didn’t remember me.

Now she didn’t care.

The thought hit me harder than I expected, and before I could stop it, tears started to gather in my eyes. I quickly turned toward the wall, pressing my face slightly into the pillow so no one would notice, not that it mattered much. Even if my roommates saw me crying, I doubted they would say anything. At best, they would ignore it. At worst, they would find it amusing. Either way, I didn’t want anyone seeing me like this.

A quiet sigh left my lips as the tears slipped down my cheeks. I closed my eyes for a moment, trying to steady my breathing, trying to pull myself together. Crying wasn’t going to fix anything. Sitting here and feeling sorry for myself wasn’t going to change the situation either. If anything, it was only going to make me feel worse.

I needed to think.

Slowly, I wiped my face with the back of my hand and pushed myself up into a sitting position. My head felt heavy, but I forced myself to focus. There were too many things going on, too many problems piling up on top of each other, and if I didn’t start organizing my thoughts, I was going to drown in them.

The first thing that came to mind was Yuna.

The moment her name crossed my thoughts, the guilt followed immediately after. It was always like that. No matter what I was doing, no matter what I was thinking about, the guilt was always there, waiting to remind me that she was gone. That she had died, and that I hadn’t been able to stop it. I could still remember the way everything had unfolded, the way it had all felt so sudden, and the more I thought about it, the more certain I became that what happened to her wasn’t what everyone said it was.

It wasn’t suicide, it was murder. I knew that, and yet, the world had already moved on, already accepted that version of the story without question. The case had been closed, and no one seemed interested in looking deeper into it. Unfortunately, Yuna also didn’t have any friends, so no one besides me cared, and I couldn’t just accept that. I couldn’t pretend like it was fine and move on like nothing had happened.

Which was why I had already made up my mind.

I was going to Varynthia.

I had already made up my mind about going, and all I had been waiting for was the right moment. I had told myself I would wait for Electra, wait for her memories to come back so we could go together, but now… that didn’t seem like it was going to happen anytime soon, and even if it did, I wasn’t sure I could keep waiting.

Not when the guilt felt this heavy, and not when it felt like I owed Yuna something.

The more I thought about it, the more certain I became that this was the right time. If anything, the situation with Electra only made it easier. We weren’t on good terms right now. She was busy with whatever she had decided to do with her life, and clearly, I wasn’t a priority to her anymore. If I left, she probably wouldn’t even notice, and even if she did… she wouldn’t care.

That thought stung more than I wanted it to, but I pushed it aside.

It didn’t matter.

I swung my legs over the side of the bed and stood up, taking a deep breath as I steadied myself. My eyes moved toward the wardrobe, and without letting myself hesitate, I walked over to it and opened the door. The familiar sight of my clothes and belongings filled my vision, and for a moment, I just stood there, staring at them.

Then I reached in and started packing.

I didn’t take much, just the essentials. A few outfits, some personal items, anything I thought I might need for the trip. My movements were quick but careful, like if I stopped for too long, I might change my mind. I didn’t want to give myself that chance.

Once I was done, I zipped up the bag and placed it on the bed before reaching for my phone. My fingers hovered over the screen for a second before I scrolled through my contacts and found the name I was looking for.

Darius.

The line rang for a few seconds before he picked up, his voice sounding slightly confused. “Seraphina?” he said. “It’s a little early over there, isn’t it? Is everything okay?”

I didn’t bother with small talk. “I need your help,” I said simply.

That got his attention immediately. “What do you need?”

“I need a flight booked to Varynthia,” I replied. “As soon as possible.”

There was a brief pause on the other end of the line, like he was processing what I had just said.

“Varynthia?” he repeated. “That’s not exactly a casual trip, Seraphina. What’s going on?”

I hesitated for a moment before answering. “I just… need to go,” I said quietly. “Please, don’t ask too many questions right now. Just help me book it.”

Another pause followed, longer this time.

Then he sighed. “Alright,” he said. “I’ll handle it. I’ll send you the details as soon as everything is confirmed.”

“Thank you,” I murmured before ending the call.

I lowered the phone slowly and stared at it for a moment, my grip tightening slightly. This was it. There was no going back from this decision. Once I left, things were going to change. I didn’t know how, and I didn’t know what would happen when I came back, but I knew one thing for sure.

I couldn’t keep waiting for Electra to become someone she wasn’t anymore. If she didn’t care that I left… then maybe it was time I stopped caring about staying.

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