Chapter 24: A Night to Forget. Pt. 1

’How long has it been…?’

Ezra’s breathing was uneven, shallow and shaky. The room was large, yet it felt unbearably small, especially now that he’d surrounded himself with blankets and pillows.

He didn’t even know when he’d started doing that.

He had heard of nesting.

He knew what it was.

He knew that was what he was doing.

So why couldn’t he stop? He was fully self-aware.

Ezra felt like he had lost control over his own body.

Worse, sometimes it felt like his thoughts weren’t entirely his either.

Perhaps, they were his thoughts. He really didn’t know anymore.

Minutes had passed.

Or hours.

He wasn’t sure.

All he knew was that he’s been there for a long time.

Time had blurred into something meaningless as he pressed himself into the bed, seeking comfort in a way he never would have allowed before.

The realization alone made his chest ache.

He was crying.

Actually crying.

Something he hadn’t done in over a decade.

That frightened him more than the heat itself.

He had come into this room to think.

To calm down.

To make sense of what was happening to him.

And yet his mind kept circling the same truth, one he still stubbornly refused to accept.

’I’m not in heat,’ he told himself weakly. ’I was probably just poisoned.’

Even as his body screamed otherwise.

And poison? Seriously? What kind of poison made one seek intercourse.

Sex.

He wanted sex.

He hasn’t even experienced having any form of sexual acts, and yet his body craved it.

The pain was deep and relentless, and every instinct whispered the same solution.

One he refused to acknowledge.

He shut his eyes tightly.

’I won’t,’ he thought fiercely. ’I will never do that.’

Ezra had to tough it out.

And yet the thought lingered, tempting, dangerous.

But it would’ve been so easy.

Omegas rarely have a hard time finding someone to mate with, especially male omegas since they were rare–

’No. No. Don’t even think about it,’ he scolded himself. ’Don’t give in. Don’t let your omega instincts win.’

Even if he did… who would it be with?

No one.

Ezra had standards.

There wasn’t an Alpha in the world he would allow to touch him like that.

Well—

Maybe one.

Only one man.

The thought made his chest tighten painfully.

But that man was engaged.

To a powerful woman. To the future queen.

If Ezra gave in to that desire, it wouldn’t just ruin him.

It could plunge the entire kingdom into chaos.

War, even.

So it had to be no one.

No one at all.

Or—

No.

Ezra squeezed his eyes shut again.

He was spiraling.

Caught between logic and instinct, between who he was and what his body demanded.

And he didn’t know which side would break first.

’Dear Aurethys… please help me,’ Ezra thought faintly. ’I know I’m not the most faithful man, but if there is a God… please.’

The stone walls were thick. The door was still locked. The nest he’d built from every pillow and blanket now felt like both a sanctuary and a prison.

’I just want it to stop,’ he begged silently. ’Please… make it stop.’

Sweat beaded on his brow, his skin hypersensitive to the point where even the brush of damp fabric sent unwanted sensations through him. His body felt foreign, too reactive, every nerve ending screaming.

A deep, rhythmic ache pulsed from his core. Hollow. Insistent. Impossible to ignore no matter how hard he tried.

’Everything’s soaked.’

He bit his lip hard enough to taste metal.

His white pants were ruined.

As if being in heat wasn’t humiliating enough, as if being forced to want something he despised wasn’t already unbearable, his body still betrayed him like this.

This was why he hated being an omega.

The way something so intimate could be forced upon someone. The way desire could be dragged out of him whether he wanted it or not. Whether he consented or not.

No wonder omegas were treated as less than people.

Breeding tools.

Homemakers.

Distractions.

’Why did I have to become an omega?’ Ezra thought bitterly. ’Why? Why did it have to be me?’

“STUPID FUCKING GODS–Ah.”

Ezra punches the bed as he shifts, trying to find a position that didn’t make the throbbing worse.

It was a mistake.

A HUGE MISTAKE.

Because the rough seam of his pants dragged against the swollen, sensitive length of his…member.

And there was a sharp, electric jolt of sensation that ripped a ragged moan from his throat before he could stop it.

’Fuck.’

It echoed in the quiet room.

Ezra froze, horrified, more tears of frustration and shame welling in his eyes.

“What was that…?”

That sound he let out… that was the sound of his discipline shattering.

’That felt so…’

The ache was becoming agony, a physical pain born of denial.

’…good?’ His hole clenched on nothing, a slick, empty pulse of pure need.

He was going to go mad.

He knew it.

The scent of his own desperation, sweet and cloying, filled the whole room.

Why?

Because for a moment.

No…

That one split moment of pleasure, removed all of his pain.

And now he was wondering.

He was…considering–

“No,” he whispered to the empty room, his voice broken. “I will not.”

But his hands betrayed him.

Slowly, his hands drifted from clutching onto thick duvets, down the tense plane of his stomach.

“M-Maybe just…for a while.”

Just to ease the pain.

The rational part of his mind screamed, a distant, fading echo. His fingers brushed the hard, hot outline of his cock through the fabric.

And with that small gesture, he shudders.

’Why does that feel so good?’

He pressed the heel of his palm down, rubbing in a slow, tentative circle.

“O-Oh…Agh…” A gasp punched out of him.

Pure, undiluted relief.

However…

It wasn’t enough.

It was only a drop of water in a desert.

“Oh God.”A sob caught in his throat as his fingers, clumsy with need, worked at the laces of his trousers.

“Damn you,” he cursed, not sure if he was cursing his body, his nature, or himself. “Damn this.”

The ties gave way.

He shoved the heavy wool down over his hips, kicking them off into the tangle of bedding.

“Fuck.” The cool air of the room hit his fevered skin, a shock that made him hiss. He was laid bare, his cock standing thick and flushed against his stomach, the head gleaming with pre-cum.

Beneath, the evidence of his heat was undeniable—his entrance was slick and swollen, glistening in the dim light, pulsing with a rhythm that matched his frantic heart.

The sight broke the last of his resistance.

’I need…I-I…need…’

His hand wrapped around his shaft, and his head fell back, a strangled cry tearing from his lips.

The feeling was electrifying to the point where Ezra couldn’t believe he had never done this.

As a knight, Ezra prized his physical strength. His mentor had drilled into him the idea that something called “testosterone” could diminish if he gave in to certain urges.

Whether it was true or not, the fear stuck, and Ezra denied himself anything that might make him weaker.

But that fear was long gone now.

Ezra gave a tentative stroke, from root to tip, the skin sliding smooth under the copious slick.

His hips jerked off the bed, seeking more.

More.

“I need more–” he moaned, the sound wet and broken.

There was desperate, rhythmic friction of his fist, the slick, filthy sounds of his own pleasure, the overwhelming scent of sex and submission that he was producing.

He picked up the pace, his arm moving with a frantic, graceless urgency.

He was chasing it, chasing the peak that would grant him a moment’s peace from this fucked up situation.

’I need more.’

And Ezra knew what ’more’ he wanted.

Since he was already knee-deep into this, he might as well.

Right?

It wouldn’t hurt.

…right?

He let his other hand drift lower, and lower.

The place he never expected to ever touch.

The tip of his finger trembled as they brushed against his wet, heated entrance.

“Woah.” He gasped, his strokes on his cock faltering.

Suddenly the empty feeling was starting to make sense. He needed to be filled.

The omega instinct was a roar in his blood, drowning out every coherent thought.

’I need…to be filled.’

He pressed a single finger against the ring of muscle.

“F-Fuck,” he stammered, beginning to insert a single finger inside. The angle was awkward, but the feeling… It was a glimpse of heaven.

As he gave in to the moment, lost in the intensity of it, Ezra failed to notice the change.

The door had opened.

And it wasn’t until a deep, familiar voice broke the silence that he realized—

“This… is a surprise.”

He was no longer alone.

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