Chapter 193: How Do I Become Heartless… Like Him?
Chapter 193: How Do I Become Heartless… Like Him?
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- Trapped in a Novel as the D-Class Alpha I Hated Most
- Chapter 193: How Do I Become Heartless… Like Him?
Chapter 193: How Do I Become Heartless… Like Him?
Flashback 🌸 — Moon & Zyren
The car glides to a stop in front of the Arden mansion, its sleek black surface gleaming under the soft glow of evening lights.
The sky above is a bruised purple, the last traces of daylight bleeding away beyond the treeline.
Servants stand in a neat row along the marble steps, their postures perfect, heads bowed low, waiting to welcome their young master home.
The door opens.
Twenty-one-year-old Moon steps out, his movements unhurried—almost reluctant.
His face is unreadable, a mask shaped by exhaustion and something deeper, something that sits behind his blue eyes like a stone beneath still water.
There’s a weariness to him that doesn’t belong to someone his age, a heaviness in his shoulders that speaks of carrying too much for too long.
He walks toward the entrance, his footsteps echoing against the marble path. The evening air is cool against his skin, carrying the faint scent of night-blooming jasmine from the gardens his father tends with such care.
“Young Master. Good evening.”
The servants greet him in unison, their voices a practiced chorus of respect. Moon doesn’t react. He doesn’t nod, doesn’t smile, doesn’t acknowledge them at all. He just keeps walking, his gaze fixed on the grand doorway ahead, disappearing into the shadows beyond.
Inside, the living room glows with warm light. Candles flicker on the mantel, their flames dancing in the still air.
Milan Arden and Elias Arden sit together on the velvet couch, wine glasses in hand, their voices low and easy as they talk about nothing and everything.
The room smells of aged oak and candle wax—of comfort, of time, of a quiet life untouched by the storm Moon carries in with him.
Moon walks past them without a word.
Milan’s gaze lifts, following his son. His face brightens, a smile spreading across his features—warm, genuine, the smile of a father who doesn’t see his son often.
“Son.” His voice is soft, welcoming. “You’re home.”
Moon doesn’t greet them. Doesn’t say anything. Doesn’t even glance their way.
He starts up the stairs, his back straight, his steps heavy—each one a quiet declaration of distance.
Milan’s smile fades slowly, like light retreating from a room.
Elias watches their son disappear up the staircase, his expression unchanged. He lifts his wine glass, taking a slow, deliberate sip—calm and measured, as always.
“His behavior grows ruder by the day,” Elias says quietly. There’s no anger in his voice. Just observation.
Milan reaches over and pats his husband’s shoulder, a soothing gesture—familiar, worn.
“Honey, please don’t be angry with him. You know how he gets when he returns from Qi Country.”
Elias sets his glass down, the crystal clinking softly against the table. The sound lingers in the quiet room.
“He goes there every year.” Elias’s voice is steady, but there’s an edge beneath it. “Every year, he hopes Zyren will see him. And every year, he comes back with nothing but more heartbreak.”
“He loves him.” Milan’s voice is soft, almost a whisper. “You know that.”
Elias’s jaw tightens, a muscle jumping beneath his skin.
“How many times must I tell him? That boy is not an Omega. He never will be. Why does he keep chasing someone who has made it clear he doesn’t want him?”
Milan’s voice stays gentle, patient—the voice of someone who has had this conversation a hundred times before.
“Honey, you know Moon has loved him since childhood. Whether Zyren is an Omega or not… whether he ever returns those feelings or not—Moon’s heart won’t simply let go.”
A quiet pause.
“You can’t command a heart to forget. You can’t force someone to stop loving.”
Elias looks away, his expression unreadable. He stares into the fireplace, at the slow dance of flames—at something Milan can’t see.
Milan stands, smoothing the front of his shirt. “Don’t worry. I’ll talk to him.”
Elias nods once.
Milan walks toward the stairs, his steps slow, deliberate—as if buying himself time.
The staircase is long and winding, lined with portraits of family—ancestors watching with painted eyes, their secrets buried with their bones.
He reaches the second floor and stops outside Moon’s room. The door is closed. Light seeps from beneath it—a thin gold line.
Milan knocks once.
Then, quietly, he opens the door.
Moon sits on the couch near the glass wall, curled inward, a cushion pressed to his chest like a shield.
His blue gaze is fixed on the glass, watching as day surrenders to night, as the last traces of sunlight bleed from the sky. The room is dim, lit only by the fading glow outside and the soft light of a single lamp in the corner.
Milan’s heart clenches at the sight—so young, so alone, carrying a love that has nowhere to go.
He walks over and sits beside him, close enough to feel the sadness radiating from him like heat from dying embers.
“My son looks so sad,” Milan says softly.
Moon doesn’t look at him.
Milan pats his head gently, his fingers threading through his hair, the touch soft and familiar.
“Did he not meet you this time?”
For a long moment, Moon is silent. The only sound is the distant hum of the city outside, muffled by the glass.
Then, after a long silence—
“No. He met me.”
Milan’s smile returns, small and hopeful—a fragile thing.
“Then did you two make up?”
Moon turns to look at him. And Milan sees it—the shine in his eyes, the tears he’s fighting to hold back, the crack in the armor he wears so well.
His lips part, hesitate, then part again.
“He said he hates me.” His voice is barely a whisper, fragile as glass.
A pause.
“He said he never wants to see my face again.”
Another breath.
“Not ever.”
Milan’s smile fades completely, replaced by something softer—grief, maybe, or the helplessness of a parent who can’t fix their child’s pain.
He reaches up and wipes the corner of Moon’s eye, catching the tear before it can fall.
“Son,” he says gently, “Zyren is only fifteen. At that age, people say things they don’t mean. They make mistakes. They hurt others because they don’t know how to handle what they feel.”
He pauses, choosing his words carefully.
“When his anger fades, he’ll understand. He’ll regret it. Maybe he’ll even come to Country K… just to see you.”
Moon looks away, his jaw tight, his profile sharp in the dim light.
“You’re lying, Dad.” His voice cracks. “You said the same thing last year. And the year before that. And the year before that.”
He swallows hard.
“He doesn’t care about me. He never did.”
A breath.
“I was just a child who believed in fairy tales.”
Milan takes Moon’s hand, holding it between both of his own. His son’s fingers are cold.
“Moon, listen to me carefully.” His voice is low, earnest. “Zyren is an Alpha. Not an Omega. He won’t feel things the way you do. And maybe—”
“I know.” Moon cuts him off, his voice sharp. “I know what he is. I know what I am. I know we’re both Alphas. I know we don’t fit the way the world says we should.”
He looks at his father, and his eyes burn—with frustration, with pain, with a love that refuses to die no matter how many times it’s wounded.
“I don’t care about traits. I don’t care about dynamics. I don’t care what anyone else thinks.”
His voice breaks.
“I love him. That’s all I know. That’s all I’ve ever known.”
Milan squeezes his hand, his voice softening.
“I know how much my son loves him. I’ve watched you carry this for years… watched you leave and return, leave and return, hoping each time will be different.”
His throat tightens.
“But Moon… you can’t force someone to love you back. You can’t make someone choose you.”
“But he did love me.” Moon’s voice turns stubborn, almost childlike—an echo of the little boy who once believed in promises.
“He promised.”
A breath.
“He said he’d be my bride.”
Milan cups Moon’s face in his hands, tilting it up so their eyes meet. His son’s cheeks are wet, his lashes clumped with tears.
“That was a long time ago, son.” His voice is gentle, but the words settle heavily between them.
“You were both children. Children make promises they don’t understand. They play at love the way they play at games… not knowing some games leave scars.”
He pauses, his thumb brushing Moon’s cheek, wiping away a tear that has already fallen.
“And besides…” He hesitates. “You’re both Alphas. Maybe… that’s reason enough.”
His hands fall away.
“Maybe it’s time for you to move on, son. To find someone who can love you the way you deserve.”
He stands, his heart heavy.
“Don’t hurt yourself chasing someone who won’t be caught.”
His voice softens, final.
“Rest now.”
He walks to the door, his footsteps slow, reluctant. He pauses at the threshold, looking back at his son one last time.
Moon sits in the gathering darkness, his silhouette framed by the window, by the last light of day, by the stars just beginning to appear.
Milan steps out and closes the door behind him.
The room falls silent.
His father’s words linger in the air like smoke, curling around him, suffocating him.
He doesn’t move. He doesn’t speak.
The tears slide down his cheeks, silent and unstoppable, falling softly onto the cushion pressed against his chest.
“How do I stop?” he whispers to the empty room, to the fading light, to the boy who isn’t there.
“I don’t know how. I can’t.”
His voice breaks.
“How do I become heartless… like him?”
Source: Webnovel.com, updated by NovelKeep
Chapters
- Chapter 216: I Feel Like I’m Dreaming....
- Chapter 215: Zyren… You Look Gorgeous...
- Chapter 214: This Time, I Have No Regrets...
- Chapter 213: How Am I Supposed To Accept This?
- Chapter 212: Kill Me....
- Chapter 211: My Body Requires An Alpha…
- Chapter 210: Take Care Of Yourself, Angel...
- Chapter 209: How Could Angel Do This?
- Chapter 208: I Will Never Stop Loving You..
- Chapter 207: Am I Really… Dying Like This?
- Chapter 206: Love Has No Rules...
- Chapter 205: Angel Doesn’t Feel The Same...
- Chapter 204: It’s Just Dinner...
- Chapter 203: I Realized It From The Beginning...
- Chapter 202: The Same Impossible Dream...
- Chapter 201: A Month Since Moon Left..
- Chapter 200: Without A Goodbye...
- Chapter 199: He Won’t Come Back...
- Chapter 198: Why Can’t I Just Walk Away?
- Chapter 197: Would You Still Stay With That Beta?
- Chapter 196: Belongs To Someone Else...
- Chapter 195: Did He Just Say Thank You?
- Chapter 194: What Else Didn’t The Novel Say?
- Chapter 193: How Do I Become Heartless… Like Him?
- Chapter 192: Sometimes Words Make Things More Complicated...
- Chapter 191: Why… Are His Eyes Gold?
- Chapter 190: Just Hurting Me Differently...
- Chapter 189: I Love Him Most Like This....
- Chapter 188: You’re My Most Effective Medicine...
- Chapter 187: Why Are You Acting Like This?
- Chapter 186: What Was He Trying To Say?
- Chapter 185: Golden Omega....
- Chapter 184: Something I Don’t Recognize....
- Chapter 183: I’m Here... I’m Yours...
- Chapter 182: I Don’t Want To Lose My Pheromones...
- Chapter 181: I’m Not An Alpha Anymore...
- Chapter 180: You’re A Terrible Kisser, Zyren...
- Chapter 179: He’s Something He Shouldn’t Be...
- Chapter 178: Why Do You Smell Like An Omega?
- Chapter 177: Making Love... Last Night...
- Chapter 176: He’s A Foodie Now?
- Chapter 175: It’s Your Punishment...
- Chapter 174: He Didn’t Do Anything....
- Chapter 173: Something Off...
- Chapter 172: Everyone Deserves A Second Chance...
- Chapter 171: It Feels Like Heaven...
- Chapter 170: I’d Rather Live Alone...
- Chapter 169: I’m Your Present... And Your Future....
- Chapter 168: Eyes Like Winter Stars..
- Chapter 167: A Perfect Night… Almost
- Chapter 166: Sweeter Than Anything....
- Chapter 165: This Is Our Stop..
- Chapter 164: This Is Everything I Wanted...
- Chapter 163: Let’s Be Stupid And Young And In Love. ..
- Chapter 162: Night And Moon—Meant For Each Other
- Chapter 161: You’re Mine, Zyren...
- Chapter 160: Your Omega Is Truly Incredible.. Beautiful..
- Chapter 159: Too Strong For A Beta...
- Chapter 158: My Pink Bunny...
- Chapter 157: The Silence Of Love♡
- Chapter 156: I’ll Wait... For The Day You Come Back To Me...
- Chapter 155: There’s No ’Better’ Or ’Worse’ Here...
- Chapter 154: Let’s Start Fresh... A New Beginning..
- Chapter 153: I’ve Loved You Since We Were Children...
- Chapter 152: You’re The Reason..
- Chapter 151: Now In Return Be My bride...
- Chapter 150: I’m Trying To Be A Gentleman..
- Chapter 149: Dreaming With Open Eyes...
- Chapter 148: Your Eyes.. They Look Sad...
- Chapter 147: Monster In Human Skin..?
- Chapter 146: Why Are You Like This?
- Chapter 145: Do You Feel Like My Secret Lover Now?
- Chapter 144: I’ll Say It... You’re My Omega...
- Chapter 143: No One Can Take Your Place....
- Chapter 142: Let’s Sit Down And Talk....
- Chapter 141: You Need To Give Me Something In Return..
- Chapter 140: I Have An Offer For You...
- Chapter 139: Aren’t I Your Family Too...?
- Chapter 138: What If He Leaves?
- Chapter 137: The Cost Of A Fantasy
- Chapter 136: Because That’s What Family Does...
- Chapter 135: We Can’t Reveal Our Relationship...
- Chapter 134: Every Night, I’ll Remind You..
- Chapter 133: I Was The Bottom..
- Chapter 132: Zyren.... Touch Me..
- Chapter 131: When Did You Start Liking Me?
- Chapter 130: I Am Just... Loved...
- Chapter 129: Cutey Are You Single....?
- Chapter 128: Unfortunately You’re Not My Omega...
- Chapter 127: Because I Like Your Scent...
- Chapter 126: A Surprise.... For Me..
- Chapter 125: He Came Back To Me..
- Chapter 124: The Damn Cream-Colored... Card
- Chapter 123: Who Is This Omega?
- Chapter 122: I’m a Beta.....
- Chapter 121: I Feel Like I Know Nothing...
- Chapter 120: Betas Don’t Have Pheromones...
- Chapter 119: Just Him.. Just Me.. Just Heaven♡
- Chapter 118: You Could Hide From Me?
- Chapter 117: Dream, Illusion, Or Reality
- Chapter 116: He Doesn’t Like—
- Chapter 115: In Your Room.. Like Before..
- Chapter 114: A Little Late-Blooming Omega?
- Chapter 113: Teddy Bear...
- Chapter 112: You’re The One Who Changed..
- Chapter 111: This Is Payback...
- Chapter 110: Something Is Off...
- Chapter 109: Were You Jealous?
- Chapter 108: Kiss Him... Kiss Him Now...
- Chapter 107: A Shy Nod of Yes
- Chapter 106: I Love You ♡
- Chapter 105: Teenagers Behind The Bleachers
- Chapter 104: A Terrible (Kiss) Fight♡
- Chapter 103: Walking On Clouds
- Chapter 102: Family Deserves Honesty
- Chapter 101: Is There Someone In Your Life?"
- Chapter 100: Your Whole Attention
- Chapter 99: Just… Stay With Me
- Chapter 98: The Love Hasn’t Faded... It Has Been Deleted...
- Chapter 97: A Worried, Angry Angel...
- Chapter 96: Why Is He Acting Like This?
- Chapter 95: You’re Overthinking... Little Bunny..
- Chapter 94: Retired Villain’s Burning Cheeks
- Chapter 93: My Favorite Place In Any World
- Chapter 92: Ready To Pay Anything For Him....
- Chapter 91: You Can Be An Angel In Hell..?
- Chapter 90: I Want To See Him....
- Chapter 89: A Bunny’s Deal..
- Chapter 88: Cute Bunny ♡
- Chapter 87: Finally... I Win...
- Chapter 86: I Want An Answer....
- Chapter 85: First Snowfall♡
- Chapter 84: I Need To Find Someone Else...
- Chapter 83: Bittersweet Couple...?
- Chapter 82: Two Passes, Please....
- Chapter 81: You’re The Problem
- Chapter 80: Between Us...?
- Chapter 79: Trapped Rabbit
- Chapter 78: Handsome Guest
- Chapter 77: How Did We End Up Here?
- Chapter 76: The Unexpected Question
- Chapter 75: It Felt Like… Disappointment
- Chapter 74: Are You Sure You’re An Alpha..?
- Chapter 73: I Didn’t Think You’d be This Useless.....
- Chapter 72: Male Lead Staring At Me...?
- Chapter 71: Is Angel… Trying To Kiss Me?
- Chapter 70: Sun And Moon
- Chapter 69: Sugar and Soft Laughter
- Chapter 68: Borrowed Warmth
- Chapter 67: I Mean— Every Single Word
- Chapter 66: Blackmail Was the Plan. The Kiss Wasn’t...
- Chapter 65: I Want You....
- Chapter 64: My Best Friend...
- Chapter 63: Good Match
- Chapter 62: Your Dream?
- Chapter 61: Flustered Mystery
- Chapter 60: Forget it...
- Chapter 59: My First Real— Kiss ♡
- Chapter 58: Beauty..?
- Chapter 57: Why Did You Hide This?
- Chapter 56: Find Deniz
- Chapter 55: I Should Stop Trying...
- Chapter 54: A Confession
- Chapter 53: Good Morning... Zyren ♡
- Chapter 52: I’ve Ruined Everything.
- Chapter 51: One Hundred And Four
- Chapter 50: Be My— Family
- Chapter 49: Can I Join You..?
- Chapter 48: You’re Just Drunk On Power
- Chapter 47: A Purer Kind Of Scheme
- Chapter 46: Little Villain
- Chapter 45: You Left Me Here.... Alone
- Chapter 44: Is My Pillow Softer... Or Is Your Chest?
- Chapter 43: He’s Just A Beta... A Side Character
- Chapter 42: Just Sleep...On The Bed
- Chapter 41: Stop Saying Cute.. Say Handsome
- Chapter 40: I Have Good Cleaning Skills
- Chapter 39: Deniz… Can I Stay At Your House Tonight?
- Chapter 38: Mommy… What is Love?
- Chapter 37: Who Is The Villain, Really?
- Chapter 36: How You’d Look Wearing Something… Precious
- Chapter 35: I Don’t Want To Leave You…
- Chapter 34: God—Have Mercy On Me
- Chapter 33: The Reason Zyren Kael Became A Villain.
- Chapter 32: All I Want Is to Comfort You
- Chapter 31: If My Partner Is You... I’m Ready To be an Omega
- Chapter 30: We Look… Perfect
- Chapter 29: A D-Class Alpha… Rare?
- Chapter 28: I’m Not An Omega! I’m An Alpha
- Chapter 27: Give Me A Bright Smile Instead Of A Thank You
- Chapter 26: Something Beautiful... Like Him
- Chapter 25: Let’s Spend The Whole Weekend Together
- Chapter 24: I Respect Your Choice, Angel
- Chapter 23: Body Of Retired Villain
- Chapter 22: Like Foolish Teenagers
- Chapter 21: It Would Be Someone Like You
- Chapter 20: That Was Definitely Not In The Novel
- Chapter 19: I’m Extraordinary Lucky
- Chapter 18: Why Am I Paying for Zyren?
- Chapter 17: Pink Rose Stands For Friendship
- Chapter 16: My Favorite Book Character ♡
- Chapter 15: Cold Punishment
- Chapter 14: Different Reasons. Same Loneliness.
- Chapter 13: I Want A Future With Him...
- Chapter 12: Even I’m Villain... I Will Survive.
- Chapter 11: Together...? Yes Together.
- Chapter 10: What About A Strawberry Cake....?
- Chapter 9: I Change The Script
- Chapter 8: Get A Grip Neon....
- Chapter 7: Small Steps Are Enough
- Chapter 6: Things Begin To Change
- Chapter 5: I’ll Fix This
- Chapter 4: The First Deviation
- Chapter 3: I’m Going To Rewrite Everything
- Chapter 2: Woke Up as the Villain
- Chapter 1: If I Were the Villain