Chapter 118: Cold

NOAH

The walk back through Hospital San Rafael felt like moving through a dream where the gravity was twice as strong as it should be.

The bright, clinical white of the walls pressed in on me, and the smell of antiseptic… once just a scent… now felt like it was coating my lungs. Alex walked beside me, his pace steady, his presence a quiet anchor in a world that was still spinning out of control.

Every time I closed my eyes, I saw him. Not the Cassian who had just dismissed me, but the Cassian from thirty minutes prior. The one sitting on that bed with blood staining his collar and cuts marking his beautiful, arrogant face.

I kept replaying the way he’d walked away. The cold, mechanical efficiency of his gait. The way his shoulder had clipped mine… not as an assault, but as if I were a physical obstacle in his path, like a chair or a pillar.

I didn’t exist to him anymore.

As we reached the lobby, Alex stopped at the reception desk. He began talking to a woman in a sharp suit… a hospital administrator, perhaps. They were discussing liability, insurance, and the “next steps” for the project’s principal partners. I stood a few feet away, my hands shoved deep into my pockets to hide the fact that they were still shaking.

I tried to tell myself to stop. He’s fine. He was sitting up. He was talking. He was being a dick, which is his natural state. But the intrusive thoughts wouldn’t stop. What if he had a concussion? What if there was a slow bleed in his brain? The way he’d dismissed the doctors was terrifying. He was treating a high-speed rollover like a stubbed toe.

Without really deciding to do it, I found myself drifting back toward the nurse’s station. The same nurse who had been in Cassian’s room looked up, her eyes softening when she recognized me.

“Can I help you?” she asked.

“The other patient,” I said, my voice sounding thick. “From the accident. Cyan… I don’t actually know his last name. Is he okay?”

She checked her monitor, clicking through a few screens. “Mr. Devereaux? He’s stable. He has some deep lacerations that required stitches and a clean break in his left radius. He’ll need surgery to set it properly, but he’ll make a full recovery. He’s currently resting.”

The relief was so sudden it made my dizzy. “Thank you,” I breathed. At least Cyan was okay. At least one of them would be forced to lie down and let the world take care of them for a while.

The drive back to was a heavy, suffocating silence. Alex didn’t push me. He didn’t ask how I was feeling or why I looked like I was about to burst into flames. He just let me sit there, staring out at the Barcelona streets.

It was torture. My mind kept circling back to that mangled car we’d passed on the highway. The front end had been crushed like an aluminum can. I pressed my palms against my eyes, pushing until the pressure created stars in the darkness. He’s alive. He’s alive. That’s all that matters.

Alex glanced over at me, his brow furrowed with genuine concern. “You okay?”

I lowered my hands, forcing a breath. “Yeah. Just… it’s been a lot.”

“I can imagine.” Alex paused, choosing his words carefully. “I know you and Cassian have a… complicated relationship.”

I tensed up immediately, the old instinct to protect Cassian… or perhaps to protect myself from the truth… flaring up. “It’s not… we’re just coworkers, Alex.”

“Right,” Alex said, though he didn’t sound convinced. “Well, complicated coworkers, then. For what it’s worth… I think he cares more than he lets on.”

My chest tightened so hard it hurt. I thought of the way Cassian had looked at me in the room… the disgust, the dismissal. “He doesn’t care,” I said, my voice flat. “Trust me. I’m just a distraction he’s finished with.”

“Maybe,” Alex mused. “Or maybe he just doesn’t know how to show it. Men like him… they see vulnerability as a death sentence.”

I didn’t respond. I just looked out the window and watched the shadows of the palm trees flicker across the glass. It didn’t matter why he was the way he was. All that mattered was the result.

We returned to the project site, trying to salvage the afternoon. I tried to focus on the clipboard, on the measurements Rodriguez was shouting out, on the timeline for the glass installation. But everything felt off-kilter. The world had tilted on its axis during that accident, and it hadn’t snapped back.

Then, a sleek black car pulled up to the gate.

My heart didn’t just stutter; it skipped a full beat. Cassian stepped out. He had changed clothes… a fresh black shirt, a charcoal blazer… but the cuts on his face were still there, stark and angry. He looked like a man who had walked out of a war zone and immediately called a board meeting.

He walked toward us… well, toward Alex. He didn’t even glance in my direction. It was as if I were a part of the construction equipment, a piece of scaffolding he didn’t need to acknowledge.

“We need to discuss the next part of the project,” Cassian said to Alex, his voice clipped and professional.

Alex blinked, looking incredulous. “Cassian, maybe we should postpone. Given the circumstances… you were just in a rollover three hours ago.”

“No,” Cassian said, his jaw tightening. “It goes forward as planned.”

“You could have a concussion!” Alex argued. “You need to rest.”

“I’m fine,” Cassian snapped, the irritation back in full force. “The gala is in two days. The investors are already flying in. Everything stays on schedule.”

Alex looked like he wanted to physically shove Cassian back into his car, but he knew better. “If you’re sure,” he sighed.

“I am.”

Cassian pulled out his phone and began rattling off details… guest lists, catering adjustments, media coverage, the security protocol for the investor presentations. He was all business. Cold, efficient, and terrifyingly focused. It was like the accident hadn’t happened. Or worse, like he was using the work to drown out the fact that it had.

I stood three feet away, trying to be invisible. I stared at my clipboard, but my eyes kept drifting to him. I watched the way he moved… there was a slight stiffness in his shoulder, a momentary wince when he reached for his phone that he thought he was hiding. He was in pain. He was hurting, and he was standing there pretending he was made of stone.

He didn’t look at me once. Not even a flicker of his eyes in my direction. He acted like I wasn’t even there.

“That’s settled then,” Cassian said finally, closing his phone with a definitive snap.

“You should really go back to the hospital,” Alex tried again.

“I have things to handle,” Cassian said, already turning away. He headed back to the car without a parting word to me, without even a “goodbye” to Alex.

The car door closed. The engine purred, and then he was gone. I was left standing there in the dust of his departure, feeling hollow. Invisible. Like a ghost haunting my own life.

“He’s stubborn,” Alex said, turning to me. He must have seen the shattered look on my face. “Always has been.”

“Yeah,” I forced my voice to stay steady. “I noticed.”

“Don’t take it personally, Noah. I’m sure he’s just worried about his friend.”

I wanted to scream. I wanted to tell Alex that Cassian had pushed me away specifically. That he’d fired me. That he’d told me I was nothing. But I couldn’t find the words. I just nodded and looked back at the construction.

“Come on,” Alex said, his voice gentle. “Let’s finish up here. Then maybe grab dinner? You look like you could use a drink. Or three.”

I managed a small, tired smile. “Yeah. That sounds good, Alex. Thank you.”

The rest of the day dragged on like a slow-motion film. Every minute felt like an hour. I checked measurements I’d already checked.

I made notes I’d already made. My mind was a broken record, playing back the image of the wreckage, the blood on Cassian’s collar, and the coldness in his eyes.

Finally, the sun began to dip toward the horizon, painting the Barcelona sky in bruised purples and oranges. Alex approached me as the workers began to clear out.

“Hey. You still up for hanging out?”

I looked at him… his kind eyes, the genuine concern etched into his face. The alternative was going back to the hotel suite alone, sitting in the silence, and letting my thoughts tear me apart.

“Yeah,” I said. “Definitely. But if it’s okay with you I’d like to stop by at the hotel and change.”

“That’s not a problem.”

“Yeah. It’ll only take like twenty minutes.”

We arrived at the entrance of the hotel where Alex waited.

The building felt different when I walked in. Colder. Emptier. The luxury of the lobby felt mocking now, a gilded cage for a bird that had been told its song wasn’t needed anymore.

I took the elevator up, each floor feeling heavier than the last. The hallway to the suite stretched ahead of me, silent and long. I reached the door, my heart doing a strange, nervous flutter. I unlocked it, pushed it open, and stepped inside.

I froze.

The lights were on. In the living area, Cassian was there. He wasn’t resting. He was standing by the table, his back to me, packing files into a leather briefcase with a grim, focused intensity.

My breath caught. It stopped completely in my lungs.

I stared at his back, at the way his shirt pulled across his broad shoulders.

Cassian turned slowly. He looked up, his eyes meeting mine. His expression was a mess of things I couldn’t decipher… tiredness and something layered beneath it all that looked like a flicker of something raw and exposed.

For a long moment, neither of us moved. The only sound was the hum of the air conditioning and the distant city traffic below. I

“I thought you’d be at the hospital,” I said. My voice was a whisper, a ghost of a sound.

“I needed a few things,” Cassian said. His voice was flat, emotionless, but he didn’t look away. “Don’t worry. I’ll be gone soon.”

He went back to the briefcase, clicking the latches shut.

I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know what to say. Every cell in my body was telling me to run, to go back to Alex, to leave this room before it broke me. But I didn’t want him to leave. Even after everything, even after the dismissal and the cruelty… I wanted him to stay.

Why do I want him to stay this bad? I asked myself, the realization hitting me like a punch to the gut. Why can’t I just let go?

The silence stretched between us, heavy and suffocating, loaded with all the things we weren’t saying. The air felt electric, like the moment before a storm breaks.

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