Chapter 99: What the Future Holds

Ishiki told him about the changes that had happened to the rewards and indeed Kenji had not known about them.

He summoned the system window and studied it for a long moment. He stared at the text, scanning lines Ishiki couldn’t see, before letting out a long, ragged sigh.

He dismissed the system window and jaw tightened.

Ishiki saw the muscles feathering under the parchment-thin skin, a subtle grinding of teeth that betrayed the calm facade he was trying to maintain.

“So?” Ishiki pressed, his voice soft but insistent. “What are you doing about it, Kenji? A new Skill Card… could change everything for you.”

Kenji looked away, staring at a blank spot on the wall, and yet his eyes were a little distant. After a stretched moment he simply answered in a low voice.

“Nothing,” he murmured. “I’m doing nothing.”

“Nothing?” Ishiki blinked looking at the man who said nothing after that. “What do you mean nothing? Didn’t you wanna complete the fucking Scenario?”

“What can I even do? It’s not like I can go and kill the damn emperor on my own.” Kenji whispered, his voice detaching from the present. “Yeah… when we weren’t here, I wanted to complete the scenario and go back home as soon as possible. Now? I just want to live here… Alone. And maybe… just die here alone.”

Ishiki stared at him. The silence stretched between them, just this time it was heavy and suffocating.

The man across the table looked broken and shattered… he was not sure of what to think about it, but this same man was called a hero by the people in the outer regiment. He didn’t knew the exact details of why, but most of them respected Kenji for clawing his way out of the Gluttonous Meadows alone.

Ishiki was even more awe struck as he knew what kind of skill he had. He sighed, the fight draining out of him, leaving him slumped against the cushion.

“Actually,” Ishiki said softly, looking down at his palms trying to trace the lifelines there that had always made the English character M. “I thought that too. This place… it’s paradise, isn’t it? The air doesn’t taste like ash. The water is clear and we can actually have a future here.”

“I found my mom here. The person I thought was dead and buried under the ruins of Neo-Tokyo. I have everything I ever wanted, actually.” Ishiki’s voice wavered. “But still, something had always been missing… and I just recently realized it.”

“What did you realize? That you don’t need any of those?” Kenji said with sarcastic edge to his tone.

Ishiki however narrowed his eyes and leaned forward. “This place can have everything, Kenji… but at the end, its not Earth and as far as it can go, I believe that Earth might be a smoking crater… but that crater is where we belong.”

Kenji chuckled at the explanation… what was Ishiki saying, maybe he has actually gone insane after spending quality time with Yuki. Even his words almost sounded noble… wait, were they noble?

Those words were nothing more than selfish confession of a ghost.

“Do you hear yourself Ishiki? What will you do on a smoking crater? Dance?” Kenji asked laughing. “It would be useless… at least if you stay here, you will have some purpose to live with.”

Ishiki wasn’t taken aback by it, rather his voice grew firmer, cutting through the gloom. “What has happened to you… you were going to marry Akari, weren’t you? What happened to that? Are you going to give up on her? Are you going to just sit here in the dark and rot until you die and turn into a monster?!”

Ishiki instantly regrated what he said. ’This goddamned corruption.’ He couldn’t help it… well, and he even lost his temper there for a minute.

He was the most straightforward guy in the whole world… or maybe not, if anyone else had a corruption similar to his.

Anyways, that didn’t matter right now. What mattered had already been said out loud and now was the wait for reaction.

To Ishiki’s surprise, Kenji didn’t get angry… in fact he didn’t even flinch. He just looked at Ishiki with eyes that were terrifyingly empty and forced a smile.

“I never said I gave up,” he replied, his voice was devoid of defensive heat. “I just… don’t want to wake up.”

“Wake up? from what?” Ishiki frowned at the weird answer.

“This dream,” Kenji gestured vaguely to the room, to the silent city outside and to this whole world they were in right now. “Isn’t it like a dream? We have superpowers… hahaha, but we are dying because of them. Well… let’s leave that part, its reality now… and to be fair It’s good enough for me.

Because if I wake up… if I go back… I might find out she’s actually dead. I wouldn’t be able to take that, Ishiki.”

He leaned forward, his face contorting with a desperate, fragile madness.

“Here, at least… at least it’s not a certainty. As long as I’m trapped here, inside this cage, I am free to believe she is alive somewhere else. I’m free to believe that we are the ones who are dead, and she is the one living.”

“That’s a lie,” Ishiki countered, shaking his head. “You’re building a sanctuary out of lies, Kenji. We are alive. We survived and that can’ be changed. Are you fucking dumb? she must be in a scenario too, and you know that too. Now look around you, what do you expect a scenario to be.”

Ishiki laughed hypocritically. “Its a wicked death game. If you survived… maybe she did too and maybe she even completed the scenario and is now waiting —”

“We shouldn’t have survived!” Kenji interrupted, his voice cracking like a whip. He slammed his hand on the table, the teacups rattling violently. “We should have been dead by all accounts! If not you, then at least I should have been!”

He took a shuddering breath as his composure shattered like glass.

“There were fifty-eight of us,” Kenji choked out, tears welling in his eyes. “Fifty-eight people were in my starting group, and out of all of them only I reached this place. Only I walked out of those meadows.

Do you know why, Ishiki? Because I refused to die. I ate things that a human shouldn’t have… I did such vile things that stripped the human out of me and i will continue to do more. I am afraid now.”

“But I can’t… I can’t take it anymore. What happens after we complete this Scenario? There will be another one, right? And another? It will never end until there’s nothing left but a monster wearing our skin.”

Ishiki opened his mouth to argue, to offer some hollow motivation about strength and survival. But the words died in his throat.

He looked at Kenji and saw the reflection of his own darkest thoughts. Was what he saying not true? Was that not what their life had been reduced to?

No yet… there was still something left until all that happens. They didn’t know what the future holds for them, not until they clear this scenario and move forward.

Ishiki remembered about Ren. His best friend… Ren was gone now. Probably died in the collapse or who knew maybe, lost in a trial or scenario. He had pushed that grief down, buried it under layers of cynicism and survival instinct. But he couldn’t deny that it was there… and Kenji’s was even more.

“I…” Ishiki started, his voice trembling. “I get it.”

He slumped back, the facade crumbling.

“You’re right,” Ishiki whispered, almost laughing. “I’m tired too. I just want to stay here. I want to pretend this is all there is and I want to forget that there was ever anything else.”

At that moment Kenji laughed too… “One of my fellow captains was selected as the Inner guard just days ago… he is a player and first of the player has finally made it to the inner ring.”

Ishiki looked at him with a slight grin on his face… he indeed had more information than Yuki or him.

“It is just like you said…” Kenji whispered. “We do not belong here. Our fates are sealed as the slaves for the system. I will… have to kill the emperor.”

Source: Webnovel.com, updated by NovelKeep