Chapter 119: Blood on my hands

Hale spent several minutes moving through the abandoned cars scattered along the road, checking one after another. He popped open fuel caps, leaned inside, even rocked a few of them to see if anything sloshed in the tanks.

Nothing.

Terri watched from the passenger seat of their car. Her hands rested in her lap, fingers twisting together without her noticing.

Hale finally slammed both hands down on the hood of a rusted Subaru.

The sound made her flinch.

He stood there for a moment with his head lowered, breathing hard, before turning and walking back toward their car.

Terri’s breath caught when he yanked the door open and dropped into the driver’s seat, slamming it shut behind him.

He looked worse than before. More tired. More angry.

Terri stayed quiet while he rubbed his face and took a few slow breaths.

Then he turned to her.

“What the hell were you even doing?” he snapped. “Wasting that much damn gas?”

Silence filled the car.

Terri swallowed.

“I—I was—”

“What do you suggest we do now, huh?” Hale cut in. “Push this car to the nearest station that isn’t there? Or am I gonna do it while you sit in here like you always do?”

His voice cracked at the edges.

Terri’s expression tightened like he had slapped her.

Hale muttered something under his breath and leaned back in the seat.

A moment passed.

Then Terri spoke.

“Well at least I tried to do something…”

Hale looked at her.

Confused.

“I used the gas to go back to the compound,” she said quickly. “I thought maybe the others would come back there. I wanted to check.”

Hale stared at her.

“You did what—?”

Terri’s voice rose before he could keep going.

“It’s better than sitting around with a walkie talkie talking to people who clearly aren’t there!” she shouted.

Hale’s face shifted slightly.

Terri kept going.

“What kind of half-assed attempt at finding them is that anyway??! It’s like you don’t even care enough!”

Hale didn’t answer.

“If we keep doing things your way,” she said, pushing through the nerves in her chest, “then by my estimate we’ll never—”

Hale slammed his hand into the steering wheel.

The sound cracked through the car.

Terri jumped.

He pointed at her.

“Don’t,” he said under his breath.

“Don’t you dare say another word.”

Terri folded her arms and turned toward the window, jaw tight.

Neither of them spoke.

After a moment Hale opened the door and stepped out.

Terri turned quickly.

“What’s going on?” she asked, almost panicked. “What are you doing?”

He grabbed his pack from the back seat.

“We’re walking.”

Terri frowned, but she already knew there wasn’t another option.

She stepped out, grabbed her pouch, and followed him.

The forest swallowed the road after a few steps. Leaves crunched under their boots while the wind pushed softly through the branches above them.

They walked for a while without speaking.

Finally Hale broke the silence.

“What did you find?”

Terri blinked.

“Hm?”

“At the compound.”

She thought for a second.

“Well… nothing much,” she said.

Hale frowned but kept walking.

“But I did see tire marks,” she added. “They looked like they belonged to Adira’s vehicle.”

Hale finally looked at her.

“It was late though,” Terri continued. “I didn’t want to follow them by myself without—well…”

Hale faced forward again.

“…We’ll start there then,” he said.

Terri stopped for a second as he kept moving ahead, eyes slightly widened.

Then she hurried to catch up.

—

I climbed through the safe window and dropped into the living room.

My boots hit the floor with a dull thud. I set my pack down beside the wall and straightened up. Lila slipped in through the window behind me and pulled it closed again.

Another house.

Old drywall. Faded paint. The kind of place that had been abandoned in a hurry months ago. It sat just outside the edge of Chicago, close enough that the skyline still cut into the distance if you climbed high enough.

Far enough from Amber territory that we could breathe. Close enough to remember they were still out there.

It worked for me.

I stayed cooped up here since the incident.

Well, it wasn’t just me.

People filled the house now. Some sat against the walls with blankets over their shoulders. Others lay on the floor trying to sleep. Most of them looked sick or worn down from the road.

Faces, unfamiliar, the ones that were with Julia since Chicago.

Others were busy doing their helping around the room however they could.

These were the strays Julia carried along and swore we had an obligation to protect.

And Damien…Damien was still amongst them.

He sat against the far wall with his arms folded, watching everything without saying much.

I wish he’d just fuck off.

I sighed quietly and slipped my handgun into the back of my waistband.

“Mommy! Mommy! That man has a gun!”

I froze for half a second.

A little boy tugged on his mother’s sleeve, pointing at me with a grin like he had just spotted something exciting.

I gave him a small smile.

Then my eyes lifted.

Aubrey was staring at me.

She had been talking to an older woman a second ago, her voice calm and patient while she reassured her about something. That softness disappeared the second she looked at me.

“And where the hell’ve you been?”

I didn’t answer her.

Lila’s gaze hardened at her words as Aubrey scanned the two of us.

The smear of blood on my cheek, to the bat strapped to my backpack that would’ve tracked blood everywhere if I hadn’t cleaned it so thoroughly.

“Don’t tell me…” she said under her breath.

“Again, Adrian?”

She watched as I crouched down and unzipped my bag almost casually.

Inside were candy bars, chips, and a few packs of cookies I grabbed from a gas station on the way back.

The kids spotted it immediately.

They rushed over like a pack of hungry animals, grinning and laughing while they reached into the bag.

“Thanks!”

“Can I get one?”

“Adrian brought snacks!”

Small hands grabbed everything they could.

I watched them run back toward their parents with their prizes.

Every time I left this place, I told them I was going out for supplies.

For treats.

Something nice for the kids.

And every time I came back with something.

Along with more blood under my nails.

Aubrey seemed to catch on quickly though. I don’t even think she saw through my act in the first place.

“When’s this ever gonna stop??” She pressed.

“When is it ever gonna be enough for you??”

The room went quieter at that.

I watched the kids for another second.

Then I looked back at her.

“You want it to end quicker?” I said.

My voice stayed level.

“Then maybe start helping me do what I do when I go out.”

Her face tightened.

“Death isn’t going to bring them back.”

The words landed hard.

Something twisted in my chest, but I kept my face still.

“Killing those freaks…isn’t gonna bring any of them back.” She repeated.

A beat passed.

“Promise me this’ll be the last time.”

Lila looked between us, but mainly me— as if to wonder, no…anticipate what I was going to say.

“You just don’t get it, Aubrey.”

“Just stop it, alright!?!!” She snapped.

I looked at her. So did a few others.

“Stop acting like you’re the only person who went through loss! Those were my people too!!!”

A baby started crying.

I never looked in the direction.

“You never saw anything I saw.” I finally said.

“Hell, you didn’t even look.”

Aubrey’s eyes widened slightly. Her fists tightened.

“I saw it. The way you scurried back into that bus and buried your head in your ass while your friends’ bodies burned.”

Her teeth gritted.

“You wanna know what I think, Aubrey?”

I let the silence settle around me before I finally continued.

“You’re not nearly as angry enough as you should be,” I said.

“Because you just don’t care.”

Her hand came up fast.

For a second the whole room held its breath.

I didn’t move.

The slap never landed.

Lila grabbed Aubrey’s wrist mid-swing and shoved her arm away.

The two of them stood there, locked in place.

Aubrey’s chest rose and fell as she looked between us.

Her eyes were wet now, though she refused to let the tears fall.

There were a thousand things she wanted to say.

Instead she shook her head slowly.

“You keep going out there looking for trouble,” she said.

Her voice wasn’t loud anymore.

It was tired.

“One day it’s going to find you.”

Her eyes moved around the room.

To the kids.

To the old woman she had been helping.

To the people sleeping on the floor.

“If those freaks come here looking for you,” she said quietly, “and someone in this room gets hurt because of it…”

Her voice cracked.

“…that blood is on your hands.”

Source: Webnovel.com, updated by NovelKeep