Chapter 21: Fine, damn it.
“Hey—! HEY—!”
My voice went high in frustration as I shoved past bodies, my feet nearly tripping over a crate. The crowd was still buzzing around the Humvee, around me, firing questions like bullets, but I barely heard any of them.
My eyes were locked on her woman— striding away like she didn’t hear me, like she didn’t care.
That just made me so damn mad.
I pushed through one last person a little too hard. They stumbled. I didn’t even look back.
“So that’s it then???”
My breath was uneven.
“You just… send me on suicide a mission and give me the cold shoulder after—!?””
She slipped into her tent before I could finish.
I followed, anger and frustration painting my face.
The flap shut behind me, muffling the noise outside. She stood with her back to me, shoulders rigid, hands planted on a metal table as she exhaled slowly. The fuck was she hiding??
When she finally turned, her jaw was clenched tight.
“Asshole,” I snapped before I could stop myself, chest heaving. “I busted my ass for you people. The least you could do is—”
“Why are you two still alive?”
The words cut through me.
I stared at her, mouth open, confusion turning my blood cold.
Behind me, I heard the soft thud of hurried footsteps— the tent flap lifting. Lila had finally caught up.
“What..?” I breathed.
She didn’t answer.
Her eyes darted between us, pupils sharp with something she was trying hard to hide. fear? frustration? regret? I couldn’t even tell. She ran a hand over her buzzed hair, fingers shaking just slightly, and that was somehow worse than if she had been shouting.
“What do you mean why the two of us are still alive?”
I demanded.
“What were we supposed to be—..?”
She never gave an answer. I found it hard to swallow.
Collapsing into her chair like the weight of the whole the situation took her down, her elbows dug into her knees as she pressed a hand to her forehead. A broken exhale escaped from her mouth.
Then—
“I want you two out of my camp by sunrise.”
There was no anger in her voice. No, it was something akin to defeat.
Wait…what?
My face drained of color so fast. Behind me, Lila’s rage was evident through the air— her breath hitching, her knuckles becoming white as her fingers curled into trembling fists.
“Why..?”
My voice was trembling barely over a whisper. Yet, the scarred woman only stared at the floor.
A moment of silence, then a sigh.
“You don’t get it.”
She began, her tone cold.
“If you stay here, you’re gonna kill us all. Please— just…”
A shadow cast over my eyes as my knuckles clenched. A shaky breath escaped my mouth. Yet, before I could speak—
“You made a deal with those psychos, didn’t you?”
My eyes widened at Lila words. They flickered towards her, then to the commander.
She never looked up from the floor. Not even a fake, forced excuse.
Just a stiffened jaw.
A hard swallow, loud in the suffocating quiet.
She betrayed us. It all made so much sense.
“Go fuck yourself.”
The word I spat came out of me without another thought.
I didn’t want to hear or see whatever pathetic excuse or guilty twitch she’d try to hide behind, if she even had any. I shoved the tent flap aside, letting the cold night hit my face. Lila was by my side instantly, steps brisk, breath shaking with something she was barely containing.
Behind us, the flap fell shut.
The sounds of camp swallowed us once again.
Inside the tent, the scarred woman let out a long, broken sigh— the kind that sounded scraped from the bottom of a grave. Her shoulders slumped, her palms pressed into her eyes as if she could physically push the guilt back into her skull.
But she didn’t get the chance.
A voice cut through the dimness, steady and angry.
“So… is it true?”
Her spine grew stiff.
She looked up to see the boy with the glasses standing in the entrance, the lantern light behind him painting half his face in shadow.
He stepped farther inside.
“Carl—…I—”
“You made a deal with the Crucible?”
It was more of an accusation than a question, like he’d finally pieced everything together.
His voice cracked as he continued.
“And now Aubrey… half of our manpower… the people we knew— they’re gone.”
The woman’s lips parted, breath hitching like she had words prepared for this very situation
— something defensive, something desperate.
Yet, nothing came. Nothing ever did.
Carl’s shoulders pulled back slowly.
My expression must’ve looked like a storm cloud ready to burst. I shoved my way through the people of the camp, ignoring the hands trying to grab at me, voices rising in panicked questions.
Frustration boiled over more and more with each question.
“Please— tell us where Aubrey is!!”
“Where’s Sergeant Hale—?”
“What happened out there?”
Their words barely pierced the fog building in my mind. I didn’t have the strength to answer, and even if I did, I wasnt about to give them Lila’s lie. Not yet, atleast.
Lila walked beside me, her eyes flickering with anger…and something else. I guess she was right about this too.
It really was a mistake coming back here.
We were just a few meters away from the Humvee we’d arrived in, ready to get back on the road, when someone sprinted into our path— nearly tripping over his own boots.
The kid.
The skinny one who’d explained The Crucible to us days ago. The one with shaky hands and eyes that always looked two seconds from panic— but now it looked like those traits were amplified. His glasses slid down his nose as he pushed through the crowd, breathless and pale.
“YOU TWO—! WAIT! PLEASE!”
I stopped in my tracks, jaw clenching.
People noticed his pleading shout. And with that, conversations seemed to die. Heads turned toward us, tension thickening in the air.
The boy swallowed, looking at both of us like we were the only lifeline he had left.
Lila’s eyebrow raised. It looked as if she was about to tell him to move out the way.
“I— I need you to listen,”
He stammered, voice cracking as he raised it enough for the built crowd.
“Everyone… the commander…she made a deal with the Crucible!”
Gasps slowly exploded through the camp like a shockwave.
Murmurs turned to shouts. Faces twisted in confusion, rage, fear.
The boy kept going, louder now, desperation bleeding through every word.
“She offered someone— Adrian— as part of some sick trade! To try and protect the rest of us! When the Crucible didn’t get what they wanted, t—they took the others instead…”
My brows furrowed. Hearing that out loud made me sick.
Lila stiffened beside me.
The crowd erupted behind us, voices overlapping in a sequences of revelation and anger.
But the boy wasn’t looking at them.
His trembling eyes were locked on me.
“Please… I know deep down they’re still alive. Aubrey, Sergeant Hale, the rest of them… I can’t do this alone.”
He took one shaky step forward.
“Just—”
His voice went low, pleading.
“Just help us find them. Please.”
There was silence. My pulse rang in my ears, drowning almost everything out around me.
I felt Lila tug against my sleeve.
“Come on, Adrian. We don’t owe these freaks anything.”
Her voice was barely above a whisper. My eyes darkened. I barely looked at her.
“Come on—!”
There was a crack in her voice, syllables laced with frustration, possessiveness, panic, all the things she tried to hide but failed.
“We can finally be alone together again, Adrian…please…”
Her tone was softer now, desperate like she was trying coerce me.
The world seemed to shrink around her words. It was as if she was trying to drag me back into the same small, suffocating loop we’d been spinning in for days. Running together. Surviving together. Pretending we were safe when we weren’t.
I’m tired of it.
Her hand was still clamped around my sleeve, trembling.
I stared at it.
Then, slowly and deliberately— I pulled free.
Her fingers slipped off me.
She froze. Eyes widening. A shimmer of disbelief. And underneath it… something darker.
Yet, I didn’t flinch.
Inside me, something brittle finally snapped.
I’m done running from shit. Im done being a fucking coward.
I turned to the boy.
“Fine,”
The word didn’t feel like agreement. More like a door slamming shut behind me.
God fucking damn it.
The boy, glasses crooked— stared at me in shock, like he couldn’t believe someone like me would actually say yes.
The crowd whispered silently. Lila’s breath hitched.
“F-Fine?” the boy repeated my words, his voice cracking.
“You’ll… you’ll help?”
It was clear I didn’t know what I was getting myself into…not really.
But for the first time in a long time, the pit in my stomach wasn’t fear.
It was something heavier.
Something that almost felt like resolve.
I exhaled once.
My rights to being a bitch were signed away officially.
Source: Webnovel.com, updated by NovelKeep
Chapters
- Chapter 173: When It Breaks
- Chapter 172: Say It Out Loud
- Chapter 171: Real small world, huh?
- Chapter 170: Couldn’t get enough of me, could you?
- Chapter 169: Don’t be a fool
- Chapter 168: Signal
- Chapter 167: Human or Not?
- Chapter 166: And then there was two
- Chapter 165: Final Warning
- Chapter 164: Livestock
- Chapter 163: Here’s the real welcome
- Chapter 162: The buzz that never stops
- Chapter 161: What Mrs. Graham said
- Chapter 160: The Quiet Game
- Chapter 159: Western Intake Sector Three
- Chapter 158: The Great Land of Maple Leaf
- Chapter 157: Just the way things go, I guess
- Chapter 156: I’m Not Who You Pretend I Am
- Chapter 155: Are you proud of yourself?
- Chapter 154: That could’ve gone better
- Chapter 153: Ready or not
- Chapter 152: Selective emphathy
- Chapter 151: Everyone hates Adrian
- Chapter 150: What now?
- Chapter 149: Stalker
- Chapter 148: You’re too close for comfort
- Chapter 147: A ticking time bomb
- Chapter 146: Let me breathe
- Chapter 145: You move quick, don’t you?
- Chapter 144: Won’t be the last
- Chapter 143: I know who you really are
- Chapter 142: You’re not dead
- Chapter 141: The lie that changed everything
- Chapter 140: Nothing to look back to
- Chapter 139: Scars fade but never go
- Chapter 138: Let me in
- Chapter 137: Family matters
- Chapter 136: Ugly
- Chapter 135: If im being honest
- Chapter 134: I hope you rot too
- Chapter 133: The road ahead
- Chapter 132: They fall twice as hard
- Chapter 131: Just like the rest of us
- Chapter 130: A room full of twitching bodies
- Chapter 129: Shitty people
- Chapter 128: It’s just a dream, right?
- Chapter 127: With one eye open
- Chapter 126: Not at all what I thought it’d be
- Chapter 125: Solace in my Glock
- Chapter 124: The stench that follows you everywhere
- Chapter 123: always a step ahead
- Chapter 122: The hunted
- Chapter 121: Cold feet
- Chapter 120: It’s over
- Chapter 119: Blood on my hands
- Chapter 118: You can’t go back, Adrian
- Chapter 117: I can burn hotter
- Chapter 116: I’m so sorry
- Chapter 115: I’m sorry
- Chapter 114: Closure
- Chapter 113: Unfamiliar
- Chapter 112: The day everything fell
- Chapter 111: From Missouri to Texas
- Chapter 110: Saints
- Chapter 109: Blood and Shame
- Chapter 108: Unhashed wounds
- Chapter 107: How it was always meant to be
- Chapter 106: Witch
- Chapter 105: Fucking freak
- Chapter 104: Annie and Yas
- Chapter 103: A quiet building
- Chapter 102: Friends and enemies
- Chapter 101: Jealousy
- Chapter 100: Clarity
- Chapter 99: Anarchy
- Chapter 98: Don’t leave me
- Chapter 97: Withdrawal
- Chapter 96: Southern hospitality
- Chapter 95: Mine, not yours
- Chapter 94: Monster
- Chapter 93: By any means possible
- Chapter 92: No right
- Chapter 91: Sweet, loving city I left behind
- Chapter 90: Deep shit
- Chapter 89: Nothing to gain
- Chapter 88: Like moths to a flame
- Chapter 87: April 5, 2017
- Chapter 86: Amber Society
- Chapter 85: Look at the flowers
- Chapter 84: Semblance of normalcy
- Chapter 83: The winning side
- Chapter 82: Just inconvenience
- Chapter 81: Flickering red haze
- Chapter 80: Not dead yet
- Chapter 79: Easy street
- Chapter 78: No one’s coming to save you
- Chapter 77: Anomaly
- Chapter 76: Do what we do best
- Chapter 75: And the second
- Chapter 74: Dust and ash
- Chapter 73: The first crack
- Chapter 72: Throatburn
- Chapter 71: Charity service
- Chapter 70: Obedience
- Chapter 69: A sense of safety
- Chapter 68: The future is bright
- Chapter 67: Brain shortage
- Chapter 66: Power trip
- Chapter 65: Everything to loose
- Chapter 64: A deadly road trip’s end
- Chapter 63: Sleepless nights
- Chapter 62: Delusions of the heart
- Chapter 61: Not the Lily I remember
- Chapter 60: Uglier than I remember
- Chapter 59: We own this city
- Chapter 58: Mind Fractures
- Chapter 57: Compliance is key
- Chapter 56: Different ball park
- Chapter 55: A strand of blonde hair
- Chapter 54: Ego driven
- Chapter 53: Blonde hair, blue streak
- Chapter 52: Control freak
- Chapter 51: Maybe it’s better like this
- Chapter 50: Who’s the real predator?
- Chapter 49: Tick Tock
- Chapter 48: Rely on just me
- Chapter 47: Do you miss me yet?
- Chapter 46: Route 66
- Chapter 45: Point of no return
- Chapter 44: Closer than you think
- Chapter 43: Greater Good
- Chapter 42: It keeps us alive
- Chapter 41: Do we really?
- Chapter 40: Talk, damn you.
- Chapter 39: The morning after
- Chapter 38: Flaming desperation
- Chapter 37: Fault Lines
- Chapter 36: Actions speak louder
- Chapter 35: Fear the infected
- Chapter 34: A river in Egypt
- Chapter 33: For my own good!?!?
- Chapter 32: Reality hits hard like fuck
- Chapter 31: Sleeptalkers
- Chapter 30: Wake up call
- Chapter 29: Like flies to rotten meat
- Chapter 28: Spiderweb
- Chapter 27: City of sorrow
- Chapter 26: Not much to loose
- Chapter 25: Made violent
- Chapter 24: A glimmer of hope
- Chapter 23: Not the bang you wanted?
- Chapter 22: Murderer Douchebag
- Chapter 21: Fine, damn it.
- Chapter 20: You’re safe now
- Chapter 19: Fucking blonde women
- Chapter 18: True nature
- Chapter 17: I can behave
- Chapter 16: Miss Bubblegum
- Chapter 15: Lawless land
- Chapter 14: What lies ahead
- Chapter 13: Maybe a little crazy
- Chapter 12: What they become
- Chapter 11: Train Tracks
- Chapter 10: Ex for a reason
- Chapter 9: Animals
- Chapter 8: New Jersey
- Chapter 7: This isn’t a date, right?
- Chapter 6: Collateral Damage
- Chapter 5: The Grahams make me sick.
- Chapter 4: Forks and knives
- Chapter 3: Goodbye Englewood
- Chapter 2: Are you serious?
- Chapter 1: Damn it all to hell.