Chapter 51: Maybe it’s better like this

“…Came just in time, huh?”

The smile I gave her didn’t reach my eyes. I barely felt it on my face.

We were away from the crowd now. Not far, but far enough. In my periphery, Hailey’s people were crouched around her, hands slick with blood as they worked. Others lingered in small knots, rifles slung but ready. Terri, Aubrey, and Hale stood nearby, free of the burlap sacks, shaken but alive.

I looked back at Lila.

Blood had pooled at the corner of her lips. Her hair was a mess, clinging to her face and neck. Her chest barely moved, shallow breaths scraping in and out like breathing itself hurt.

There was something wrong in her eyes.

Not panic, not regret.

Something tight. Coiled.

“Lila,” I said quietly. “Are you okay?”

She didn’t answer.

Didn’t blink.

Her gaze stayed locked on me, unflinching.

“Are you hurt?” I tried again. “Anywhere?”

Still nothing.

The silence crept under my skin, sharp and uncomfortable.

“It was dangerous for you to come,” I went on, unease creeping into my voice.

“I had it handled. You didn’t have to stick your—”

She suddenly grabbed me.

Her bloodied hands clamped onto my shoulders and slammed me back into the wall. The impact drove the air out of my lungs in a sharp, humiliating gasp. Pain flared through my back.

“What the—…!”

“I’m not letting them take you,” she said, voice low and shaking with fury. “I don’t care who they are.”

Her hands stayed on my shoulders, fingers digging in, nails biting through fabric.

“Not her. Not them. Not anyone.”

I stared at her, stunned.

Her eyes were red. Wild. Focused entirely on me.

“…Lila, calm down for a—”

“You think I don’t see it?” she went on, cutting through my words.

“You think I don’t feel you pulling away every time you get better at surviving this?”

“Lila—”

“We were supposed to be in this together, and yet…” her voice cracked, trembling.

“You’re getting stronger,” she snapped. “More capable. And im slowly turning into just a fucking afterthought because of it.”

My chest tightened.

“I know moment you decide you really don’t need me anymore, you’re going to leave.”

“That’s not—”

“You already showed me once.” she cut in. “The way you chose them.”

Her hands shook as she gestured vaguely toward the camp.

“Terri. Aubrey. Hale. You took them with you. You didn’t choose me.”

My throat went dry.

For a moment, I couldn’t even form words.

“Why…? Why not me?”

“Lila…that’s not for the reason you think—.. I—”

She pulled away slightly, eyes burning. I followed her movements.

“Who am I kidding?” she hissed.

“I already had a feeling this was going to happen from the note in your sleeping bag.”

My blood ran cold.

What…?

“The one Aubrey gave you,” she continued. “The one that told you to leave me.”

My lips parted, but nothing came out.

“You tore it up,” she said, almost laughing.

“Like that meant anything.”

My lip trembled.

“Oh…, you thought I didn’t know?” She said, almost laughing.

“You think I’m stupid. Is that it? Huh???” I flinched as her voice rose.

“I see everything. I know everything. You can’t hide anything from me.”

Her voice carried.

Too far.

I noticed people watching.

Hailey.

Aubrey.

My stomach dropped.

My hands lowered hesitantly to hers.

I grabbed Lila’s arm and pulled her away before it could spiral further, dragging us toward a more secluded corner. She resisted, yanking against my grip, but I didn’t let go.

Hailey hissed as the bandage was cinched tight around her hand.

“Damn slut bit me,” she spat, jerking her wrist away before the medic could finish. “She’s out of fucking control.”

Blood had already soaked through the first wrap. Someone cursed under their breath and reached for another roll.

Aubrey’s eyes flicked up at the sound.

Not to Hailey.

To the space meters away— where Adrian had pulled Lila aside.

Terri stood beside her, arms wrapped tight around herself. She swallowed, eyes fixed on the two figures half-hidden by shadow and canvas.

“You don’t think she’s that mad at him, do you?” Terri whispered.

Her voice barely carried over the low hum of the camp.

Aubrey didn’t answer right away.

She watched Lila shove Adrian back— saw the way his shoulders hit the wall, heard the dull impact even from here. Her jaw tightened. Her hands curled slowly into fists at her sides.

Terri’s mouth pressed into a thin line.

Aubrey took a step forward.

Then another.

Her body moved before she fully decided to—instinct dragging her toward them.

A firm hand closed around her shoulder.

She stopped short.

Hale stood beside her, solid as a wall. His grip wasn’t rough, but it wasn’t negotiable either.

“Let the kid handle this on his own,” he said.

Aubrey turned on him, eyes sharp.

“She’s not stable,” she said under her breath. “You saw what she just did.”

“I saw,” Hale replied calmly. His gaze never left Adrian and Lila. “And jumping in right now would make it worse.”

Aubrey’s fingers flexed under his hand.

For a moment, it looked like she might shrug him off anyway.

Then she exhaled.

Hard.

Her shoulders sagged just a fraction as she stepped back, breaking eye contact with the scene for just a brief moment.

“…Fine,” she said quietly.

But after, she didn’t look away.

Not even for a second.

In the quieter space, Lila ripped her arm free.

“Okay,” I said, forcing calm into my voice. “First things first. I was never planning on abandoning you. If I wanted to leave, I would’ve done it back at the camp.”

She scoffed.

“The whole reason we’re doing this,” I continued, “is because you’re not okay—”

“I DON’T FUCKING NEED FIXING, ADRIAN!”

The shout hit me square in the chest.

I went silent.

She was breathing hard now, shoulders rising and falling.

“Lila,” I said carefully, “look at what’s happening right now.”

Her jaw clenched.

“I can’t pretend this is okay anymore.”

She laughed, sharp and disbelieving.

“Oh my god. Seriously?” she said. “You’re saying that now? After everything I’ve done for you?”

“And that’s why,” I said, stepping into her space, voice overlapping hers, “I’m going miles out to a place I’ve never been before. That’s why I’m risking everything.”

She froze.

I hesitated for just a moment.

Then—

“Because I love you,” I finally said.

“I love you, Lila.”

Her eyes widened.

“I know I should’ve said it from earlier. I know, and I’m sorry.”

There was a moment of silence.

“But that’s why I’m sticking my neck out for you so much,” I went on, voice low and shaking despite myself. “Please. Just let me prove that to you.”

For a second, her expression softened.

Just a crack.

I felt like by saying that, I was going deeper into something I couldn’t pull myself out of.

With that, she slammed her hands against the wall behind me, pinning me there.

The sound echoed.

My eyes widened, heart lurching painfully.

But I didn’t move. Couldn’t. Her anger held me in place as tightly as her grip.

I felt her hesitation as she moved closer, her breath hot against my face.

Before I could react—

Before I could raise my hands—

She kissed me.

My tear-filled eyes widened just a fraction before they closed

I kissed her back, tasting blood.

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