“We’re fine Vim. I’m glad to see you well, but we have no need for you today.”

Renn shifted next to me, and I did my best to ignore her tail that was very noisy beneath her clothes. It was wiggling something fierce, just as she ground her teeth.

Glancing past the Sheilla, I studied the small family of birds staring at us from a half open door.

“Please Vim… we are fine. As we have always been. Thank you for checking up on us, but from now on it won’t be needed,” Sheilla said, her eyes were rather firm as she stared at me. I found myself rather proud of her. She was usually very soft spoken. The kind of gentle and demure one would expect from a such a kindhearted bird as her. Right now all of the children, and the older ones, staring at us from the house were all birds… but there had been many times I’d come and visited, and found human children amongst them.

She always took in orphans when she encountered them. No matter if they were human or not. She was that special kind of person who didn’t hesitate to save a child, no matter the danger involved.

I’d seen her stare down full grown men while protecting such children. A few times I’d almost been too late to help her. She had scars on her back to prove that.

So I knew that look on her face. The way her eyes were slightly narrowed. The way her chin was lifted up a little, in defiance.

This was Sheilla being more than she was, standing up for what she believed in. Facing a enemy or threat. I’d recognize it anywhere.

Yet this was the first time it had ever been sent my way.

“Okay… I understand, Sheilla. Know that we’ll be staying at Nevi for a short time, at least a few days. If in case you need something, we’ll be there and you know how to reach me,” I said gently.

Sheilla nodded. A little firmly. “Thank you Vim. Safe travels.”

I nodded back as Sheilla then turned away. She stepped away from us, heading back to her home, as if we had already turned around and left ourselves.

“But…!” Renn stepped forward, her voice cracking as she did, but I didn’t let her go much farther. I grabbed her arm, a little stiffly, as I watched Sheilla. She didn’t even flinch or pause upon hearing Renn.

“Farewell. May the winter be a gentle one,” I said in parting, and turned as well. I kept hold of Renn’s arm, as she made a weird whine. One that bespoke the mixture of heartbreak and anger inside of her. I turned her with me, and gently pushed on her back as to make sure she left alongside me without causing a fuss.

Renn thankfully obliged, though she did so with that same whine as earlier. She glanced back behind us as we headed along the dirt path away from the home and towards the edge of the village. This little coastal town only had a few hundred homes, and we were on the outskirts of it already. So we didn’t need to worry about having to pass through the town again as to leave.

“Vim…” Renn groaned sadly as I released her arm, but kept my other hand on the small of her back.

“It’s okay, Renn,” I said softly as we continued to leave.

“No. It’s not,” she said.

It wasn’t. But at the same time… it was.

I didn’t look back, but I did listen. I heard Sheilla whisper to her family, and then shut the door behind her after entering her house. I kept a keen ear out as I listened, but knew I’d not hear anything.

It wasn’t like someone had been in there, hiding or something. I had not smelled anyone else. I had not heard anything odd.

Sheilla had simply wished me gone. To not have me stick around.

A first. From her, at least.

“She didn’t even invite us in,” Renn whispered as she sniffed loudly, while looking back at the house we were growing farther apart from.

“No. She didn’t.”

“You said she was nice…! That she always made you pancakes,” Renn said worriedly as she grabbed my arm.

I nodded, as I noted the feel of her nails. They were a tad longer than they’d been in a long time. Why was that…?

“She usually does. Pancakes with berries in them,” I said.

“Then why…!”

“Isn’t it obvious Renn…?” I said as we reached a more normal road. It was still one of dirt, but the dirt was compacted and didn’t even have weeds growing from it. We turned onto it, and headed not just away from Sheilla’s home but the village itself. To head south, along the coast, towards Nevi.

“The vote…” Renn said through clenched teeth.

I nodded. “Very obviously. I had not thought Sheilla to be one to have such a stance… I’ve helped her many times over the years, helping her save children and stuff. But, well,” I shrugged softly, unsure of what else to say.

“Vim…!” Renn squeezed my arm, but I didn’t look at her. I could hear the tears, and I didn’t want to see her pained expression right now. It’d just make me sad.

“It happens sometimes, though. Look at the Summit, Renn. I can’t even enter that place without getting permission first… and…” I started to try and explain, to even try and find a way to address it in as nonchalant away as possible… but, per usual, my efforts were neither quick enough nor good enough.

Squeezing my arm, Renn clung to me as she wept. Full on bawling, to the point I had to slow down. She came to a stop, and rested her head against my arm as she let out a terrible sound. One that almost made me do something foolish.

“Jeez Renn… she hadn’t even turned us away too harshly,” I said softly as I studied the way she wept. I couldn’t see her face, of course, thanks to the hat she wore and the way she was leaning against me… but I didn’t need to. I could see the great emotion all over her. Her shoulders were high, as if stressed, she was trembling, and not just from the tight squeeze of my arm. I couldn’t hear her ears or tail beneath her clothes, which told me they had gone limp.

Reaching up a little, I patted her gently on her arm. She made a noise as she cried, telling me she had noticed, and had wanted to say something but was crying too hard to do so.

Really. What was I going to do with her? I had expected her to become emotional during this journey, as the vote got closer, but…

If it was already this bad, what was she going to do when we had to face true opposition?

Sheilla had turned me away. But she had not been rude about it. She had not attacked me. She had not run from the mere sight of me.

Should… should I not let her meet those like Crane? Or should I just allow her to weep and become heartbroken each time it happens?

I wanted her to be happy. Joyous. It was why I had chosen, at least in part, to step down as the protector.

Yet here I was. Hurting her.

She was such a gentle person. Seemingly welcomed by anyone we went to see. And only turned away by those either too ignorant or too foolish to realize it. Renn was not one to normally be treated in such a way. Particularly lately, what with her scent of a predator now missing.

Yet once again, indirectly because of my mistakes, she has to endure such a thing.

Lumen had been my fault. I had not intervened quick enough. I had allowed the Society, others, to decide how fate would play out. And then once it was over I didn’t properly step up and correct their stupid votes to deny her the right to live amongst them. They had hated me, and found me wanting, but had not been brave enough to actually blame me. So they had blamed her instead. The woman I was seemingly growing close to.

The Bell Church was also my own mistake, in a way. I should have gone there with them. If I had not only would Renn maybe not have been banished so readily, but maybe Fly would not have had to suffer either. And if my assumption was correct… this would only get worse. This pain was only something she would endure and encounter more and more often as time went by. Especially once I really stirred the pot and announced my intention to step down, regardless of the vote.

If not for our relationship she might right now be at home elsewhere. Making a new life. Like at Lumen, even. These tribulations and trials were my doing and mine alone. She has had no fault in them. Yet it was she who wept, not me.

In other words, since I loved her and wanted her near me… I was causing her grief. And instead of holding her and begging for forgiveness, I was just standing here awkwardly. Like a bumbling fool. My father would be ashamed of me. My mother would have locked me in an acorn for a hundred years as punishment.

For a few minutes we stood there, and thankfully Renn’s sobbing slowly lessened. She kept her head hung low, but she still clung to me even as her cries turned into sniffles.

I dared a glance back down the road, to the path we’d come from, and was glad to find we were at least out of sight of Sheilla’s home. Though there was another house not far that was in full view. Hopefully whoever lived there wasn’t very observant, or out and about instead of at home preparing for dinner as they should be at this time of day.

“How can you just smile and accept it?”

I blinked and looked back at Renn, and found her glaring at me. Rather furiously.

“What would you have me do, Renn…? Force myself into her house? Force her to greet me, and give me tasks to help with? To demand she cook food for me, against her own desires?” I asked.

Her eyes squinted and I heard her tail squirm. “No…! But…” she hesitated, and I knew it was because she herself wasn’t sure what she wanted to say in response.

It wasn’t like she had actually wanted me to do such things… yet her emotions, her heart, had told her what had just happened was wrong. And that we should correct it.

But in honesty what had just happened wasn’t wrong.

Everyone had a right to decide who they were friendly with. Everyone.

“Why is life so crazy? One moment I’m basking in the wondrous joy of great people, and then the next my heart is being broken by someone I’ve never even met!” Renn then said as she reached up to start cleaning her face

Smiling at her, I studied the way she wiped her face hidden by her dangling hair. It had gotten long again… and…

Wait no.

Reaching up, I grabbed some of her hair. Gently, of course, to the point she didn’t even seem to realize what I was doing as she kept on sniffing and rubbing her face clean of snot and who knows what else.

Why was it so long…? Most of it was bundled up beneath her hat and hood that was pushed back onto her shoulders. A part of the clump of hair I held was even a part of her bangs, and there was quite a slump of hair between the section I held and her head.

Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

Hadn’t she just gotten it cut? Didn’t Nann or someone cut her hair? How long ago had that been? It had likely been months… but…

“Vim…?” Renn finally noticed I was holding her hair, so I released it. I watched the way it fell, joining the rest… stopping a little past her breast.

“When’d you last cut your hair, Renn?” I asked.

“Huh…? Nann cut it for me,” she said as she sniffed. She was looking at me as if I was being weird.

Which was funny.

Me. Weird.

When she had hair that was growing as quickly, if not quicker, than a humans.

It had not grown that fast before, had it? It had gotten long once, but I think it was now longer than it had ever been.

Right…?

“How often do you normally need to cut your hair, Renn?” I asked. It honestly needed to be trimmed a little now. Some parts were growing faster than the others, likely thanks to the way Nann had cut it. She had done it up in layers, it had looked good on her.

“What…? What the heck? Vim why are you talking about my hair now? After what just happened!” Renn asked as she pointed past me, back to where we’d just come from. Sheilla’s house.

“It’s important. Please, I’m not trying to change topics I’m being serious,” I said.

Renn hesitated, and she gave me an odd look as she glanced down and grabbed at her hair. The same section I had just held.

“I… don’t know? Every so often… I guess? I usually cut it when it starts getting in the way of my sight, or when it starts getting stuck on stuff, or clumpy. It’s probably not long from doing that, I guess?” she said as she studied the hair in her hand.

Great. She had no idea. But… how could she? Renn wasn’t a filthy person, and seemed to really like being clean, but she also wasn’t the type to really care about her appearance. Not in the way I was used to. She didn’t care if her hair was a tad unruly or not fashioned perfectly. In fact I think I remember her even saying that the haircut Nann had given her had been the fanciest she’d ever gotten. It had been a simple one, with layers in the back. It really had looked good on her… but I kind of liked how it looked when unruly too.

“What is it Vim? Why are you being weird over it?” she asked as she looked back at me.

“You’re a non-human. One thick in the blood. Hundreds of years old,” I said.

She slowly nodded. “Yeah…?”

“Yet your hair and nails grow as quickly as a humans,” I pointed out while gesturing at her nails, which I had just noticed had gotten sharp again when she had been squeezing my arm.

“Well… I guess? Do they? Why? Why’s that a problem?” she asked.

Why was it a problem…?

I hesitated and wondered what to say to her. I mean…

Hasn’t she noticed?

“Once one of our kind reach adult age, they typically stop aging. The thicker of blood one is, the longer their youth and stuff lasts. Only a few in all my years, like Mordo, have become as ancient looking as they actually are,” I said.

Renn’s brow furrowed at me. “Are… are you saying I’m going to start growing really old? Or are you saying I should be?” she asked, trying to understand my meaning.

I shook my head. “No. I’m saying those who are thick in the blood, usually either don’t grow at all until their end, or do so only very… very slowly. Remember Root? It will take her decades to reach maturity. It took Sap almost fifty years to reach adulthood, and she had been thin blooded,” I said.

Renn shifted, and I heard her ears shift under her hat. “So… what are you saying?”

Right… well…

I hesitated again, and wondered why I was even making a big deal out of it. After all… it wasn’t like I could change it. Or alter it. No matter what was happening.

So she was different. In her own way. Unique.

That was no big deal. Everyone was unique in their own way, especially us who existed outside the realm of normalcy.

Yet hers was such an odd thing.

It’d make sense if it was something new. Like her loss of a scent to others. Something that had only just recently started, thanks to her connection with me.

But she’s been dealing with this for her whole life…? That meant it wasn’t me. Though one might be able to argue I was amplifying it…

“I’m just saying… you’re of thick blood, maybe thicker than anyone else alive today. Yet your body still acts as if it’s not, in such ways as that. Hair growth, nails… it explains why you always need to brush your tail and ears too,” I said. I’d never commented on it, but when she did she always had a clump of fur she had to toss aside that she shed while she brushed herself.

Renn sniffed again as she gave me a look. “So… it’s not a big deal at all then?” she asked.

“Not really. Just something I noticed, that was odd,” I said.

She then hit me. Square in the stomach.

I of course didn’t buckle, or even make a noise, but the impact was hard enough to jolt my whole body.

“What was that for?” I asked.

“I just cried my heart out and that’s all you’re worried about!?” she asked loudly.

“No… I was worried about that too, I had even wondered if maybe I shouldn’t have you meet Crane or…” I started to raise a hand, to defend myself, but then I was hit again. Same spot.

This time I made a little noise, since I had been in the middle of talking. A tiny grunt escaped me as Renn genuinely hissed at me. “What gives you the right to think that!” she shouted.

“It was just a consideration…” I said carefully.

To think just moments ago she had been weeping! She now stood up fully, nearly on her toes, and had both hands clinched before her into fists. As if readying up to get into the ring with me.

The sight of her acting so made me smile. I really liked that look of strange anger on her face. It wasn’t hatred, and maybe not even rage. I could even see a faint smirk hidden behind her glowering sneer and…

She hit me again. “Don’t smirk at me!”

“Hard not to when you’re being so adorable,” I defended myself.

Hopefully she wasn’t hurting her hand. She kept hitting me square in the same spot, and I knew my body wasn’t the softest thing to hit. Especially not when it was now expecting an attack. Odds are my stomach was as hard as a tree at the moment.

If she threw another punch I’ll need to step back a bit, to absorb the blow. Not for myself, but her own bones. I didn’t want to break them.

Glancing away from her hands, wondering why she had gone quiet and hadn’t hit me again… I found the reason.

She had gone completely red in the face.

The world went still for a moment, and I had to force myself to breathe again as a huge grin planted itself on my face. “You really are a pendulum!” I said happily.

Weird noises came from her as she groaned and shifted, but didn’t throw another punch. She kept her hands clasped tightly but lowered them as she looked away, as if to hide her embarrassment with her long hair. “You’ve said that before. What’s it mean?” she asked.

“Pendulum…? In that context it’s used as a reference to the tendency of your swinging of emotions. You don’t do it too often, but when you go from sorrow to joy, then anger and back again, I find myself rather fascinated. Transfixed, even,” I said.

She tilted her head for a moment, and then finally looked back at me. Her face was still red, but not as badly as before. “You like it when I’m emotional?” she asked.

“A lot. I guess…?” I admitted.

Renn studied me for a moment, and then gave me an odd smile. “You’re weird, Vim.”

“Indeed I am… But that’s fine as long as it makes you happy,” I said.

Her smile became a little wonky; as if she was trying her best to stop smiling yet found she was unable to. “Didn’t you get upset too, Vim? Didn’t what just happened hurt at all?” she then asked.

Oh? We were done talking about her, I guess. “Usually I’m the one who causes such topic shifts,” I said.

“We’ll get back to me, but if I don’t ask about it now you’ll keep distracting me until it’s too late,” she grumbled.

Right. I sighed and nodded. “It had bothered me, Renn. But only because it’s so telling. If even those like her are going to start distancing themselves from me… well… then…” I paused a moment, since her smile had finally broken. Her lips quivered a little, as if she was about to cry again. “Well, maybe my decision was the right one, Renn. Even if it hurts to say so,” I finished.

“Mhm…” she made a noise, and I noticed a small tear slide out from the corner of her eye. She ignored it as it slid down her cheek. “You don’t deserve such treatment Vim. Even if their argument that you’re not doing good enough was true, it doesn’t discount how nice you are to everyone. How you always go out of your way to help in any way you can. You helped Elk prepare for his new bedroom. Glass’s family you helped with several things, their boat and that musical instrument. You always help everyone, without asking for anything in return,” Renn said.

“The reason I help in such ways Renn is because I can’t help in the ways they actually need me to. I can’t give them what they really need, so give what I can. That’s not a good argument,” I said softly

She shook her head. “It is, Vim. Yes… you are so great, so strong, that in theory you should be able to give them all exactly whatever they need. Safe homes. Safe environments, and more. But the reality is they won’t let you. How are you supposed to protect people that won’t even attempt to fulfill the smallest of requirements for such a thing to happen? They won’t even live close enough to each other for you to properly protect them, and that’s on them, not you,” Renn said.

“How many times are we going to have this conversation before you’re willing to admit that at the end of the day, I am the one at fault, Renn? Since all of those issues are because of my own personality flaws, in reality?” I asked.

The dirt beneath her feet made noises as she shifted her weight and crossed her arms. “Don’t say that stuff Vim. It just makes me want to cry.”

“Okay… what would you rather talk about instead then?” I offered.

Renn sniffed again, and then gave me an odd frown. “What’s a pancake?”

I blinked at her, and for a tiny moment wondered if she was teasing me… but then noticed the seriousness in her eyes.

“A… soft snack. One I will promptly make for you once we reach Nevi,” I said. Odds are she’s had one before, but had heard a different name for them. It wasn’t like they were that fancy or rare of a treat.

She smiled at me and nodded. “Good!”

Feeling defeated, I sighed once more and reached my hand out. It hovered before her for a moment before she uncrossed her arms and then took my own.

She took her place by my side, right up against me, as she held my arm and we began to walk once more.

“I had offered my hand, not my arm,” I said.

“It’s in my nature to take more than I was offered,” she said.

“Is it now?”

“Well… no. Only when it concerns you, I think,” she said honestly.

I nodded at that. That made a lot more sense. When it came to others Renn was actually very reserved. She seemed to try her best to not be imposing to anyone, not even those she felt truly close to like Lilly or Merit.

“Speaking of offerings… I have a gift idea in mind for you. But before I do it I’d like to hear your opinion on it,” I said, bringing it up.

“Hm?”

“It’s about to get cold. And we will be up here in the north long enough to have to endure it,” I said.

“Right…?”

“I’d like to get you something to fit around your neck. A muffler, of sorts. Since your new clothes and cloak will protect you from most else,” I said as I pointed at her neck.

“Muffler…?”

“A scarf.”

“Oh? Really?” Renn perked up at that, which I knew she would.

I nodded. “Would it bother you if I caught a fox and used its fur? To make it for you?” I asked.

Renn tilted her head at me. “Hm…? Why would it?”

Ah. I see. My worry had been pointless. I should have kept it secret then.

Oh well. Next time. “Some women don’t like the senseless killing of animals. Well, some men too,” I said while thinking of the many who would complain at my sexism in the Society, namely those like Windle.

Renn giggled at me. “I see! Well… It would bother me if you killed animals for no reason Vim, but you want to use it to make me a present? How’s that any different than the clothes we wear? Or my shoes? Or hat?” she asked as she pointed at her head, particularly the hat made of mink.

Right…

I nodded, and felt silly again.

Right. Of course.

This was that type of era after all.

Plus she was a predator. A real one. Even if her heart was so swollen and soft, beyond rhyme or reason.

“I mean you even make stuff out of monarch leather, right? Actually, I’ve been meaning to ask about that… our bags are made out of monarchs, right? Why don’t you make clothes out of the stuff, Vim? Lilly’s cloak was made of it too, right? It seems to be rather strong and durable, and light. I bet a set of monarch clothes would last you a lot longer than normal stuff,” Renn asked as she grabbed at the sleeve on my arm she held.

She was asking why I wasn’t decked out in the stuff, not why I didn’t make more of it for her. Such a strange woman.

“Because only certain monarchs have suitable materials to make stuff out of. And of that stuff, they’re hard to properly form right. Making a cloak, or a bag or pouch, is easier than making suitable clothing. It’d end up looking really weird, or feel uncomfortable,” I said.

“Hm… that’s too bad,” Renn said.

It was. But not for the reason she was thinking.

“I’ve tried before. The few attempts I’ve had that ended up with moderately successful sets were… well… Let’s just say they didn’t last long, for one reason or another,” I said.

She snickered at me. “That means they either got destroyed instantly, or you found them hideous or uncomfortable. Probably both,” she teased.

“You’re not wrong.”

Renn enjoyed that as we left the village… leaving Sheilla behind.

I dedicated this place to memory, adding it to the rather long list that was now growing once more, of locations I no longer needed to visit during my travels. Not unless summoned, first.

We walked slower than usual, but I was okay with it. We were leaving in a form of defeat, but also with our heads high. And as we did, I was glad that we had somehow also left the tears and sorrow Renn had found while there behind too.

Even if I had to play the fool to accomplish it.

Source: Webnovel.com, updated by NovelKeep