It’s been a long time since this has happened.

“It’s so sweet, Vim. To the point I almost didn’t come with you,” Renn said, continuing on with her rambling about how much she had enjoyed her time at both the Owl’s Nest and SilverCreek.

She was not very happy she had been forced to leave them. To her, those people, was everything right now… to the point she had been willing to let me leave alone, again, as to continue dedicating her time and attention to those she perceived as family.

I was of course not so petty as to get offended over such a thing, and in fact vastly enjoyed the way Renn had found her own place in the world… and I was even more glad that the place she had found was a happy one. I was very glad she had found not just friends, but true friends. Family members. People she could rely on, and people she wanted to help and be with. Such a thing was… rare. Rarer than most people knew.

“I promise to handle this quick,” I vowed, again. This was likely the tenth or so time I’d promised such a thing.

My wife sighed as she nodded as we neared a bridge. A smaller, wooden one, that looked rickety. We were walking along a small river, heading south to Tor’s Village, and were only half a day from the Owl’s Nest. We were walking quickly, but not so fast that it would draw attention. I planned to pick up our pace later, but…

“Think we should build a bridge over our river too, Vim?” Renn asked as we stepped onto the older bridge. I made sure to not break it as we crossed.

“Technically it’s not our river, we simply own the land along it,” I reminded her.

“Hm… is there a stream or river on the land you bought before we left?” she asked.

“There’s a small stream, yes.” And an underground spring, maybe even an aquifer, from what I could tell. I planned to use it for our water source, even for the buildings near the river once I connected them.

Renn slowed a bit, to pause in the middle of the bridge as to look over its railing and to the small river beneath it. I studied her who studied the water, and found myself…

At ease.

“Think this water came from our river?” she asked.

Our river again. She really has taken ownership of that area, hasn’t she? “It’s… not impossible. The river along SilverCreek bends and eventually connects to the one that runs through Ruvindale, and as you know those feed and are fed by the lake it’s on which in turn feed all these other rivers too,” I said.

Renn hummed as she continued studying the slow moving river, and then turned to tilt her head at me. “Are all rivers connected?” she asked.

“No… at least in the way you’re asking. All water is connected in one form or another, endlessly cycling. But most rivers either flow to the ocean or into lakes, or end up in drainage areas.”

She studied me for a moment, and then glanced back at the river. “Could you make a river? If you had to?”

Oh…? “Yes. It’s actually not that hard, just time consuming. Lakes too,” I said. I once made a massive dam system for the nation I’d once built, one that had encompassed thousands of miles.

“Lakes…? A river I’d understand, since you can just dig one, but a lake too?” Renn asked, smirking at me in a way that told me she’d demand I show her proof if we had the time.

“If I can just dig a trench and make a river, why can’t I then also dig a big hole to make a lake?” I asked.

She blinked, and I watched her smirk worm into a weird frown as she thought about that. “I… suppose,” she admitted reluctantly.

Smiling at her, and the obvious annoyance on her expression over having not realized the obvious from her own statement, I wondered if I should tease her or not.

Was she done complaining about our having left the north…? Although she had been doing so for several hours now, I had been enjoying it. Just as I was enjoying this moment alone with her.

It’s been… a long time since we had been alone like this. Traveling. On the road. Without anyone else with us.

Almost too long.

“You’ve… said before you like the sea. Prefer it, even,” she then said as she stared out at the river.

“Hm?” I did, in a way, what was she going to ask now? If I could make a whole sea, maybe?

“Do you… not like our new home, then?”

Oh. “I like the sea because I like the peace I find upon it, or in it. But that peace is a lonely existence. I’d not trade our home, wherever and whatever it may end up being, for all the seas in the world,” I said.

I heard Renn’s ears shuffle under her hat as she glanced from the corner of her eyes. She wasn’t looking at me as if she didn’t believe me, but instead as if she was unsure of what to think of my statement. She was likely trying to tell if I was teasing her or not.

But I wasn’t. I did indeed love the sea… far greater than she likely knew. But what I loved more was her. And the world she was slowly creating around her. I might not feel as attached to those she was circling herself with, but I was attached to the relationships she was building with the ones in question.

I loved her love for them, and as such wanted to be near it. As to watch it grow and enjoy it… and to, hopefully, one day either learn how to do the same… or at the very least help raise our children to also enjoy it.

“Basically you’re happy anywhere I am,” she said, understanding my meaning.

I frowned but nodded. “I do enjoy the deep forests of the north, Renn. But yes, to sum it up I’m happy to go and be anywhere you are, for so long as you are too,” I said.

She smiled but sighed at me, and went to leaning on the railing of the rundown bridge. I kept an eye on her, and the wooden rail she now rested on, to make sure it didn’t break and cause her to fall in. It looked like it would snap if she wasn’t careful.

“Did you want me to say something else…? I’m being truthful you know?” I asked.

“Yes, I can tell. But honestly… I want you to start being a tad more selfish. Why do you think I forced you to openly admit to Lilly and Windle why you had kept us there for longer than you wanted? It wasn’t just because it needed to be said, you know,” she said.

“I would have preferred that topic to not have been brought up again…” I grumbled.

She chuckled at that. “Why not? There’s nothing wrong with you admitting you love someone, Vim.”

Yes there was. “If others in the Society heard such a thing…”

This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.

“You plan to step down this winter, so what does it matter?”

“I’ve not done so yet,” I said defensively.

Renn sighed at me and turned away. She returned to walking, and as such I followed her off the bridge and back onto the dirt path. “Will you not tell our daughter you love her? That you cherish her?”

“Of…” I hesitated a moment, and then frowned as I realized what she was actually trying to say. “I tell everyone I love you, Renn. I introduce you as my wife all the time,” I said, challenging what was she was trying to say.

I heard her ears shuffle under her hat again. “You do… but…”

“No butts,” I said.

“Why do you always say that in a weird way while looking at my behind?” she asked as she turned around, yet kept walking. She walked backwards while grabbing her own rear, as if to protect it from me.

“You’ve noticed…? Most don’t,” I said with a smirk. It was a silly, stupid, little play of words I always used in such scenarios.

“I notice far more than you think,” she said with a raise of her head, as if to challenge me back.

“Of that I’ve no doubt. And it’s not just my rules with the Society, Renn… that keeps me from admitting aloud I favor one member over others. It’s also my own personal beliefs, my own ethos… it’s also something I was taught,” I said carefully.

Renn stopped holding her butt as she slowed and turned back around, as to walk beside me instead of in front of me. “Taught…? By your parents you mean?”

I nodded.

“Your parents taught you not to favor anyone…? Is that why you don’t ever let yourself get close with anyone?”

“Well… kind of. Mother taught me to always treat everyone equally. That I was too…” I hesitated, but only for a moment as I stopped my own self from stopping here and now. “She taught me to believe that I was, and am, too special to give such favoritism. That if I was picky in my favor, it would be an insult to not just those I ignored and neglected but also my parents. Basically it’s a form of noblesse oblige,” I said.

She nodded slowly at me. “You’ve spoken of that before.”

Had I…? Likely. “I’m… human, Renn. I love. I hate. You know that better than anyone. So I can’t help it when I do end up wanting to favor certain people more than others… but I’m not supposed to. I love Lilly and her family. I think highly of them. But are they really more important than say… those in Telmik? Or Lumen? Truly?” I asked.

Renn was quiet for many steps before she said anything. “But surely there’s nothing wrong with admitting it, Vim…? Even if you make it clear that you can’t actually act on it, or at least are not supposed to, can’t you still at least let them know that? What’s the harm in letting Lilly and the rest know how much you care for them?” she asked.

“I warned you when our relationship began that you’d grow to be upset with my choices, and would have to accept them if you wanted this to work. Well… this is the de-facto moment of it. One day, not if but when, I will sacrifice someone like Lilly… or maybe even she herself, for someone you will hate. Because it is what I was created to do. To not weigh one soul over another without just reason to do so. You can disagree with me on it, and I don’t just expect you to… I hope you will, but you and I will have to simply agree to disagree on it,” I said calmly.

Renn again went quiet, this time waiting until the path we were on separated from the river. We now headed a bit west, towards the coast. If we followed this path until the end we’d reach Nevi, but I planned to have us step off it and head more south once we reached the next river. The major one in this region, the one that Liora and I had followed up here. “I… would be okay with you sacrificing me, Vim. For others. I’d even be angry with you if one day you didn’t. But…” Glancing at her, I found a sad smile as she glanced at me. “I hope one day you break your own rules. At least, when not if, it’s our children you do it for.”

I gulped at that, since I didn’t like how she had said it. Was she… implying something? Did she know something, maybe? A prophecy…?

“I… I hope I do too,” I said softly.

Her sad smile turned into a calmer, happier one, as she stepped closer and reached over to grab my hand.

Gently grabbing her hand as she squeezed mine, I took in a deep breath and sighed it out. How had I gone from happily enjoying her complaining over us leaving her new home to this? I now felt tired.

“Okay, next topic. I feel tired now,” I said.

Renn giggled at that. “What? I hadn’t even started teasing you about it yet!”

“Please…” I groaned and almost shivered at the idea. How was she going to do it? I didn’t want to know. “Quick, ask something else. I was able to say something earlier I hadn’t wanted to, maybe I’ll answer another question too,” I offered her an olive branch.

“Oh…!? Oh…! Uh…” she stammered a moment, and then nodded. “Do you actually like my hair like this? Your mother had a lot of hair too, right? With bows and braids?” she asked as she picked up one of the larger ones to show it off to me.

I frowned at her. “I… do?” I said, not sure how to answer her. I would like her even if she was bald, what was she saying?

“Merit said most men don’t like it when women remind them of their mothers, though.”

Ah. I chuckled at that. “Right. Some don’t. My mother did indeed have a lot of hair, which she braided, but it wasn’t like yours. Hers was kind of poofy, yours is smooth and gets all wild in a certain way hers never would have done. So I don’t have any issue with it in that way, no,” I said.

“Hm…” she didn’t seem too happy over that, as if she had wanted me to say otherwise. I was going to tease her about it, but before I could she asked another question. “Bird, Rivonne’s ancestor. He was your friend, right?”

“Yeah…?”

She squeezed my hand as she looked around, as if to make sure we were alone or something… but we were. Completely. We were over a day from even the nearest human village. “From what I gather though they hadn’t really been husband and wife, though, right?”

“I mean… in a certain sense, I suppose…” I said. Bird had loved her, but maybe not in the way that Renn was thinking. “He had been… well, like his moniker. More non-human than not,” I explained.

She nodded and smiled. “Knew it! Explains Rivonne’s weirdness, I think,” she said.

Weirdness…? Had that human been weird? I hadn’t noticed. She had seemed like any other human who felt spiritually connected to us, yet also saw us as something special. Such humans were odd but not outright weird. No more weirder than the other religious fanatics at least.

“Would you, or will you, tell Lawrence about her? They’re family in a sense, aren’t they?” she then asked.

Was… was she just going to ask a bunch of questions like these? I mean they were personal, but not… well… nothing that would be secretive, I guess. I had expected her to ask about the gods, or something… well, something that would make me regret offering the opportunity.

Oh well.

“I don’t plan to, no. Lawrence and Bird had not gotten along, Renn. At all. Something similar to you and your siblings, in a way.”

She didn’t seem to like the sound of that, based off the sad frown she gave me. “I see…”

I nodded. “Not all families are like Lilly’s, after all.”

She giggled at that. “And they’re having problems themselves!”

They were. But I wasn’t sure if I really wanted to talk about that right now, since it was something that I’d not allow myself to get too involved with.

Renn stepped closer, bumping into me as she did. I noted she did it on purpose. “You just showed your annoyance on your face, Vim.”

“Sorry,” I said as I reached up with my free hand to rub my face. Had it been that obvious?

She laughed at me. “You really should start getting used to it, Vim. It won’t be long now and we’ll all be one big happy family. What are you going to do when our children start growing up with theirs? You might even one day be related to them, you know!”

Oh…? I glanced at Renn and wondered if she was hinting at something I knew of, or was just talking of hopeful hypotheticals. Did she possibly know of Merit’s prophecy…? Merit had begged me not to say anything… so I had thought Renn hadn’t known yet. “I look forward to your troubled face when your daughter eats one of her so-called friends,” I said.

She nearly stumbled, but I held on to her as she went to laughing loudly. “Vim! That was terrible!”

It had been. Maybe. Not really. “To be honest I’m a tad worried over it, what if they end up ugly like me?” Or strong. Too strong. Hopefully they were more normal…

More laughs. “Vim!”

“Or worse what if they’re as adorable as you…? How am I going to keep all the riffraff off them?” I asked myself.

She kept on laughing, and they turned into happy giggles. “We can only hope that our children have an easier time of finding partners than us,” she said.

“Mhm…” It was here that I wanted to say, again, that we needed to agree to disagree but I let it be.

Renn eventually sighed happily at me, and again stepped closer. This time though she didn’t do it as to bump into me but instead to lean against me… as if she needed support just to walk. “I’ve missed this…” she said softly, with a tone that told me she hadn’t really said it to tease me but instead had really meant it.

Slowing a little… as to make this moment last as long as possible, I gave her hand a tiny squeeze. “Me too.”

Me too.

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