Chapter 100: Hardcore Vegetarians

Luca stood silently for a moment, letting their questions wash over him. He genuinely did not want to answer but he knew he had no choice.

So, with a calm but knowing expression, he said,

“The food I’m talking about…is something none of you have eaten for thousands of years.”

“Something your culture has long forbidden. Yet it is one of the most essential sources of protein your bodies need to survive.”

He paused deliberately, scanning the crowd.

Luna bit her lip.

Lulu tilted her head in confusion.

Julius squinted suspiciously.

And then—

“It’s meat.”

Silence.

Utter, perfect silence

A few birds chirped awkwardly in the distance, realized the tension, and shut up immediately.

Then—

One elf near the front with messy brown hair, raised her hand with a big grin.

“If it’s mead you’re talking about, then there’s no deficiency in that at all, Hero! I drink it every single night!”

A burst of laughter erupted around her.

“Right?! I drink mead every single night!”

“I can’t even sleep without it!”

“My body’s so soaked in alcohol it could start a fire if someone lit a match near me!”

“If it’s mead, I’m already ahead of the treatment plan!” One declared proudly, holding up an imaginary mug.

Meanwhile, Luca blinked at them, expression blank for a moment before dragging a hand down his face.

“I’m not talking about mead.”

He groaned.

“I’m talking about…MEAT. With a ’T.’”

That instantly killed the laughter.

The smiles dropped.

Several elves froze mid-snicker.

“Wait…” Someone said slowly. “You mean…meat as in…”

“Yes.” Luca interrupted, trying to sound patient but clearly suffering inside. “Meat. As in the stuff inside your body. The soft, fleshy part under your skin. That meat. The kind animals have too.”

A few gasps went up. One elf looked like she’d just been told she’d eaten her grandmother.

“You mean…flesh?!”

“Yes.” Luca said, gesturing vaguely. “Flesh. The edible kind. Delicious. Juicy. Tender. That meat.”

“That is where the vast majority of usable protein comes from. And because of your culture, your traditions, your heritage—you have not eaten it.”

“Not once. For thousands of years.”

He took one step forward.

“But we can’t let that go on anymore. Right now, you absolutely need meat in your diet and without it every single one of yours body will start breaking down until your a bag of bones.”

“Basically…”He let out a deep sigh. “What I’m trying to say is that you cannot stay vegetarian anymore…”

“…and you have to start feasting on some roast pigs and grilled beef if you want to live.”

After he finished, the silence held for maybe two full seconds.

Then the square detonated.

“MEAT?!” Shrieked one elf woman near the front, clutching her chest like she’d been shot. “You mean…actual dead animal flesh?!”

“Oh gods, I think I’m going to be sick!”

“I—I’d rather eat dirt!” Someone yelled.

“I’d rather lick a tree trunk!” Shouted another.

“I’d rather eat my own shoes!” Said a younger elf dramatically, holding up her sandal.

Luca blinked slowly. “Alright, calm down, calm down. There’s no need to be so dramat—”

But it was too late. The crowd had already exploded into complete chaos with different groups forming.

“No way!” One from the group that valued traditions deeply shouted. “That’s blasphemy! You want us to defile our bodies with the blood of the innocent?!”

“We are the children of the forest! The forest feeds us! It doesn’t want us to kill its children!”

On the other side, a group of younger elves were arguing in the corner.

“Wait, so like…actual animals? The cute ones?” One girl asked in disbelief. “You mean we’d have to kill them?”

“Yes.” Luca said dryly, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“But they’re so adorable!” Another young elf gasped. “Look at the bunnies! Look at the deer! They have big eyes!”

“How can you stab something that has big eyes?!”

One girl nodded vigorously.

“Yeah, I can’t even kill a spider without crying! You want me to eat one of those cute fluffy things?!”

“I’d rather starve than hurt a bunny!” Someone shouted from the back.

“I’d rather the disease take me!” Another yelled.

“I second that!” Shouted a third. “Let the illness consume my soul before I touch a animal!”

The younger elves all nodded fiercely, forming an impromptu Anti-Meat Alliance on the spot.

At the same time, a group of middle-aged elves were shaking their heads and whispering with religious fervor.

“This is blasphemy! The spirits of the forest will turn their backs on us! Vegetarianism is the path of harmony!”

“The Goddess will curse us for this.” Another whispered. “She’ll turn us into beasts!”

“Yes!” Another joined in passionately. “We’ve lived peacefully without shedding a single drop of blood for millennia!”

“You want us to start gnawing on corpses now?!”

And there was the group that looked visibly sick and were gagging.

“Ugh, just thinking about it makes my tongue die!” One said, clutching her throat.

“I can feel my soul leaving my body just imagining biting into something chewy.” Another groaned.

“Do you cook it or…do you just…bite it raw?” A small elf asked weakly.

“Don’t even ask!” A panicked woman shouted. “I’ll faint if you describe it!”

One more slammed her staff into the ground.

“Next thing you’ll tell us is to eat humans!”

“Don’t tempt me.” Luca muttered under his breath in exhaustion.

And no matter how he tried to sort it out, the chaos only grew worse.

Some were arguing, some were fainting dramatically, and one elf actually pretended to gag and fell over.

Another shouted. “I’ll never let a creature’s flesh touch my lips!” only to have someone next to her whisper, “Didn’t you once kiss a frog after too much booze?” causing her to blush.

Meanwhile, Luna looked equally horrified.

Her face had gone pale as snow.

“Wait…meat? You mean like…animals? Oh no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no.”

She backed away rapidly, waving her hands.

“I—I can’t! I can’t even pluck a feather from a bird without apologizing for an hour!”

Lulu also didn’t seem to fond of the idea but she wasn’t saying much like she was thinking of something.

And through it all, Julius stood in the corner, arms crossed, smirking quietly to himself as if watching the village implode was his favorite kind of entertainment.

Leona stood beside him, not expecting the solution to be something that would make the village react with such outrage.

Luca could only sigh, dragging a hand through his hair.

“And that…” He muttered to himself. “…is exactly why I didn’t want to bring this up.”

Of course they wouldn’t accept it.

The elves had been vegetarians for thousands of years—not just vegetarians, but fanatics of peace and harmony.

They wouldn’t step on an ant without apologizing.

Some of them cried when leaves fell off trees.

And now he was telling them to start killing animals and eating them.

“If meat enters this village, I’ll live underground with the worms!” One shouted.

“Go ahead.” Luca said dryly. “They probably have more protein than your diet.”

And then there was Nyx.

While everyone else was losing their minds, she was standing at the back with a small, amused smile on her lips as if she didn’t care at all.

And amidst the sea of horrified faces and trembling elves, that one calm, smirking expression almost felt like a blessing.

’At least someone is on my side.’ He thought in weary relief.

Still, he couldn’t let things spiral any further. The villagers were on the verge of declaring a religious war against pork chops.

And to make matters worse, they were badmouthing meat.

His precious, juicy, divine meat as if it were some sort of unholy abomination.

That was where he drew the line.

He raised his voice sharply.

“Alright, that’s enough! Shut up—everyone shut up right now!”

His tone cracked through the noise like a whip. The arguing, the gagging, even the prayers stopped instantly.

He sighed heavily and rubbed the bridge of his nose.

“You’re all overreacting.” He said, glaring at them.

“After all, I’m not asking you to dig up your ancestors and eat the flesh off their bones.”

“I’m just telling you to eat some delicious meat”

There was a short pause, then one elf at the front muttered under her breath.

“Both of those thing are equally horrifying.”

A ripple of nervous agreement followed before another stepped forward and spoke for the others in a reluctant manner,

“But Hero…for thousands of years, we’ve never even touched meat. It goes against everything we stand for.”

“We live in harmony with the forest, without harming anyone or anything. So, even the smallest lizard is sacred to us.”

“And now you’re telling us to…to eat flesh!? It’s just too much!”

Several others nodded vigorously, muttering blasphemy under their breath.

But Luca countered immediately.

“Yes! It’s because you haven’t eaten meat for thousands of years that this problem even exists!” He said, exasperated. “Your bodies are starving for protein, and it’s not something you can replace with leaves or flowers or magical fairy dust!”

“You’re dying because your diet is missing something vital and if you keep ignoring it, more of you will fall ill—one by one—until no one’s left standing!”

That shut them up for a moment.

Faces grew uneasy, glancing from one another, torn between horror and hesitation.

Luca could practically see the battle in their eyes—their instincts screaming ’no’ while their logic whispered ’he might be right.’

And seeing their hesitation, he decided to sweeten the deal.

“Look.” He said, stepping forward. “Just give me one second to explain how good meat actually is.”

That got everyone’s attention again.

“Take the tail of a cow, for example.” He said with a knowing grin. “You cut it into pieces, stew it slowly in herbs and spices, and what you get is a dish called oxtail soup.”

“It’s thick, rich, and the flavor—oh, by the gods—the flavor melts in your mouth like heaven itself!”

The elves collectively went pale.

But Luca continued enthusiastically, oblivious.

“And if you don’t have cows, there’s pigs! You can roast them till the skin turns golden and crispy, and the juices just drip down when you bite into it.”

“Or goat meat—oh, don’t even get me started. You grill that with salt and pepper, and the smell alone will make your knees weak!”

“Or maybe some nice lamb chops, soft and tender—”

“STOP!” Shouted one elf, clutching her mouth like she was about to vomit. “You’re describing it like poetry, but it sounds like a nightmare!”

Another whimpered. “Golden skin!? Juices!? Oh gods, he’s gone insane!”

“Lamb chops!? You mean baby sheep!? You monster!”

Luca blinked. “What? No, I—”

“No, no, no!” Cried another, waving her hands. “I can’t—just imagining it makes my stomach turn! I think I’ll faint again!”

And right on cue, one elf dramatically collapsed onto the grass.

“Come on.” Luca groaned. “You people are so freaking dramatic!”

And just when he thought it couldn’t get any worse, one young elf raised a trembling hand.

“U-Um, Hero…I’d love to stay and hear more about your…your flesh dishes, but I, uh, just remembered—I left my fireplace burning.”

Luca frowned. “You don’t even have a fireplace in your houses!”

“Ahahaha, silly me. But I must go check anyway!” She said, bolting out of the clearing.

Seeing her escape, another elf quickly chimed in.

“Yes! I also have to…polish my rocks! Very important ritual, you understand.”

“I forgot to water my moss!” Another shouted, already halfway gone.

“I think I left my tree unlocked!” Cried someone else, sprinting away.

“Oh no, I just remembered! My grandmother’s turtle’s cousin’s birthday is today! I need to go!”

And one by one, the elves began to scatter like panicked rabbits, each coming up with more absurd excuses than the last.

Luca stared at them, flabbergasted.

“You’ve got to be kidding me! None of that even makes sense!”

But they didn’t listen and within seconds, the once-crowded clearing had emptied out completely.

One elf tripped on his way out, yelled. “I won’t let the meat demons take me!” and kept running.

Another shouted. “Gotta protect my pet bunny in case the Hero gets hungry!” as she disappeared into the woods.

Finally, there was silence.

Luca stood there, jaw slack, staring at the now-deserted clearing.

The only ones left were Leona, standing gracefully but visibly troubled; Julius, who was holding back laughter; Lulu and Luna, who looked pale and conflicted; and Nyx, still smirking, clearly enjoying every second of his misery.

“Perfect.” He muttered. “Just perfect. My audience of dozens turned into a five-person panic club.”

“Well…” Nyx snorted softly, pushing off from the tree and strolling forward. “At least they didn’t throw you into the river for suggesting such a blasphemous solution.”

“Don’t tempt them.” Luca muttered, glaring half-heartedly at her. “Not to mention that you could’ve helped.”

“And miss this comedy?” She smirked. “Not a chance.”

Luca groaned, dragging his hands down his face as he mumbled,

“Usually, it’s when doctors recommend spinach and turnips for a healthy diet, do people react this way…”

“…But here it’s the exact opposite.”

He said shaking his head in wonder.

“Truly a new and bizzare world indeed.

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