Chapter 4: The universe owes grandpa Tai.

Tai Liwu sat cross-legged on her couch, the shirt of her police uniform unbuttoned, with a dumpling patterned towel wrapped on her head, watching One city master’s interview on the news. She found every word that came out of his mouth offensive. And she found the host’s smile dry. The moment her name was dropped like a rotten egg into the conversation, she groaned so loudly that the black cat which was passing by her window fell down in a panic.

“I think she is a bad policewoman.” Shen Weijun said. “Not because she lacks the skill but because her bad luck is alarming. She shot herself in the buttocks, two times. I bet none of you knew this. If her mother was not the Bureau president, she would not be in that position.”

Liwu groaned again. “This fruiting nut job!” She hurled a remote at the television. It landed with a thud but left no crack. What made her angry was the implication that her job depended on her mother’s position. A thing she had heard many times–in whispers, of course. But it was a lie. She had earned her position fairly.

Now, Shen Weijun’s worshipers were going to take that false opinion and run with it.

“I am not saying she lacks courage.” Shen Weijun defended himself. “I am saying that if she joined my family, the Bureau would not need to sabotage us–we’d sabotage ourselves. My people would march into battle’ and she would trip over the drones.”

The audience roared with laughter.

Shen Weijun raised his hand. “No, no. I respect her service like I respect all law enforcement officers. But if the Bureau wants peace through marriage, they should at least send someone whose system doesn’t involve bird droppings. Otherwise, the alliance will last exactly as long as her next unlucky sneeze.”

Liwu threw a pillow at the TV. The pillow bounced off harmlessly, but the little dragon toy on the table fell off and landed in her cup of coffee. Bad luck, as usual.

Before she could stand to make another one, her Bureau issued phone rang. The caller ID identified her great grandfather loudly. She sighed. This was going to be worse than the interview.

“Liwu!” her great grandfather’s voice boomed, full of excitement. “Did you hear? You could be getting married. One city master himself has mentioned you! As my oldest great granddaughter, it is right that you marry first. The city Lord is a rich CEO with a system. This is just like in the romance novels your grandmother likes to read.”

“Great grandpa, he insulted me on national television!” She flung the towel from her head.

“Insult, compliment, same thing when one is not telling lies. You do have bad luck, but that is what makes you special. If it was bad, you would be dead by now. I am sure Shen Weijun would agree with me on this. He has said he appreciates you. Do you know what this means? Great great granddaughters!”

Liwu pinched the bridge of her nose. Here we go again. “Great grandpa, I don’t want to marry One city’s master, any of his brother’s nephew’s or cousins. Let Xixi or Xifeng do it. Or another female from one of the high ranked families in the Bureau. Besides, I am too busy catching criminals and saving the world.”

“Criminals can wait and the world is not going anywhere! I have twenty-one great grandsons and two great great grandsons. The curse of male children in our family is back. Do you know how hard it is to get the smell of testosterone out of my house. And the chaos at family reunions! They wrestle, they race cars, they fart, they eat, they break chairs. I need balance before they send me to an early grave. I need pink dresses, soft cheeks, hair ribbons and cute nails. Do you know when my beard was last braided?”

Liwu rolled her eyes. “Great grandpa, you don’t braid your beard. You barely comb it.”

“Ba!” he said, waving off her protest. “You are my most beloved granddaughter that inherited all my good looks. Imagine a little girl that looks like us. Liwu….my Liwu, please give me great granddaughters so that I can finally stop pretending to enjoy trucks and riding horses. If I see another dinosaur toy in my house, I will move to the sea forever. I want dollhouses! Tea parties! Glitter.”

Liwu flopped back on the couch. “Great grandpa, even if I do get married, I could end up having boys as well.”

“Nonsense!” He recoiled. “You are the jewel of the Tai family…well after your mother. I have already checked on the Shen family; your mother-in-law is the type that favors boys more than girls. With your bad luck, things will be interesting. You will have only girls. Imagine the adventures we will have with a baby girl in the family. I am ordering for pink shoes and dresses and we speak. Oh….I am going to make her a sparkly trident.”

Liwu groaned. “Great grandpa, I am hanging up before you start naming your fictional great granddaughter.”

“Fine, fine. But remember–we have too many boys in the family. The universe owes us a baby girl. We need balance!”

Liwu ended the call, muttering, “The universe owes me a system.”

****

The next morning, Liwu dragged herself out of bed, heavy eyed and still annoyed. While she brushed her teeth, the toothbrush snapped in half! She pulled on her uniform, buttoning it crookedly at first–bad luck again. This happened two out of seven days in a week. She sighed.

As she pulled up her socks, the TV blared from the living room. Her mother’s face filled the screen, radiant and determined, speaking to the world as if she were auditioning for a soap opera.

“One city master’s remarks were very inflammatory. The world leaders came together to look for a solution that would bring peace to the world. The Bureau, after heavy debating accepted the deal. But what we want is peace, not mockery.

Shen Weijun is a…..” she cleared her throat. She had been on the verge of calling him something not so nice in front of the world. “I resent the remarks he made about my daughter Tai Liwu. Make no mistake, she is the pride of our family and if One city’s master finds himself with a few broken bones in the coming days, he should look no further. It will be one of my many brothers, nephews or husband looking to make him eat his words.”

Cameras flashed.

Threats had been made.

Liwu groaned. “Oh yeah, the peace is dead before it even started.”

Source: Webnovel.com, updated by NovelKeep