Chapter 89: Electric Boogaloo
Han Shān’s mother, Hán Bīng, sat on the best bench (forcibly relocated from the hunting demonstration area) with the posture of a queen surveying her conquered territory.
Her silver-white hair caught the light like frozen waterfalls, and her piercing blue eyes missed absolutely nothing.
Ruì Xuě was curled in her lap.
“I like you,” Ruì Xuě announced, patting her cheek with a tiny paw.
Hán Bīng’s expression softened by approximately 2%. For her, this was practically a beaming smile.
“You have good instincts, cub,” she said, stroking his white fur. “You get that from me.”
“From YOU?” Han Shān muttered from where he stood guard, strategically positioned between his mother and Bai Yue, like a very tall, very stressed buffer.
“Yes. From me.” Hán Bīng didn’t even look at him. “Your father had terrible instincts. Remember when he tried to fight that avalanche?”
“He won.”
“He lost. The avalanche surrendered out of pity.”
Ruì Xuě giggled. Hán Bīng’s expression softened another percentage point.
Nearby, Tiě Xióng sat on an upturned log, nursing the two lumps on his head and looking like a very large, very grumpy bear who had been thoroughly put in his place.
Mo Xiao sat beside him.
Not because they were friends. Because Mo Xiao had been assigned “Bear King Babysitting Duty” by the grandmother coalition, and he was taking his job very seriously.
“Don’t even think about moving,” Mo Xiao said pleasantly.
“I’m not moving.”
“Good.”
“I’m plotting my revenge, but physically, I’m not moving.”
“That’s fine. Plot quietly.”
Tiě Xióng glared at him. Mo Xiao glared back.
It was going to be a long day.
Meanwhile, at the central fire, Bai Yue was attempting to have a normal conversation with her three husbands while also being actively judged by her mother-in-law.
It was going…..poorly.
“Your walk is uneven,” Hán Bīng observed.
Bai Yue paused mid-step. “I’m sorry?”
“Your walk. It’s uneven. You’re favoring your left side. Bad for the baby. Fix it.”
“I’m… not… favoring anything?”
“You are. Han Shān, tell her she’s favoring.”
Han Shān looked at his mother. Looked at Bai Yue. Looked at the sky, as if begging the ancestors for intervention.
“She… might be slightly favoring?” he tried.
“SEE?” Hán Bīng nodded triumphantly. “Fix it.”
Bai Yue bit back approximately seventeen responses and consciously evened her stance.
Ruì Xuě, still in Hán Bīng’s lap, tilted his head. “Grandma, why are you being mean to Mama?”
The clearing went silent.
Hán Bīng looked down at her grandson. “I’m not being mean. I’m being helpful.”
“It sounds mean.”
“Helpful often sounds mean. You’ll learn that when you’re older.” She paused, then added, slightly softer: “But I’ll try to be less… mean.”
“…Okay.” Ruì Xuě snuggled back into her lap, satisfied.
“The baby,” Hán Bīng suddenly announced after some time had passed.
Everyone braced.
“How is it? The baby. How is it doing?”
Bai Yue blinked. “It’s…fine?”
Hán Bīng nodded approvingly. “Have you decided on a name?”
“Yes.”
All three husbands snapped their heads toward her.
“Yes?” Zhāo Yàn’s ears perked up. “You’ve decided? When? Why didn’t you tell us?”
“I decided privately,” Bai Yue said, a small smile playing on her lips. “It felt right.”
“What is it?” Han Shān asked, stepping closer.
“What is it?!” Yàn Shū echoed, practically vibrating with curiosity.
Bai Yue looked at them, her three ridiculous, wonderful, chaotic husbands, and felt warmth bloom in her chest despite the morning’s chaos.
“I’m naming him
Silence.
“Zhēn?” Zhāo Yàn repeated. “As in… precious? True?”
“Yes.” Bai Yue’s hand drifted to her belly. “Because he’s precious. Because this family, all of it, all of you, is the truest thing I’ve ever had.”
Han Shān’s ears went pink.
Zhāo Yàn’s tails started wagging before he could stop them.
Yàn Shū made a sound suspiciously like a sob and quickly covered his mouth.
“That’s…” Han Shān started. Stopped. Started again. “That’s…”
“Good,” Hán Bīng finished for him. “Simple. Strong. Meaningful.” She looked at Bai Yue with something that might, might, have been approval. “You chose well.”
Ruì Xuě bounced in her lap. “Zhēn! Baby Zhēn! Can I teach him to pounce? Can I? CAN I?”
“When he’s older,” Bai Yue laughed. “Definitely.”
The morning wore on. The cubs played. The adults… existed, in various states of tension and exhaustion.
Gū Gū had produced tea from somewhere and was drinking it with a satisfied air.
Hán Bīng had reluctantly allowed Ruì Xuě to return to his siblings but kept shooting glances at Bai Yue, assessing, calculating.
Finally, she spoke again.
“You.”
Bai Yue looked up from her drink. “Yes?”
“The panda.” Hán Bīng gestured at Yàn Shū, who immediately went rigid. “Is your mother coming?”
Yàn Shū blinked. “I… yes? Gū Gū sent word to her as well, so she should be arriving… sometime today. Or tomorrow. Travel times are variable depending on—”
“Good.” Hán Bīng nodded. “We should meet. The grandmothers. Discuss arrangements.”
“Arrangements?” Bai Yue asked warily.
“For the birth. For the naming ceremony. For the cub’s future.” Hán Bīng counted on her fingers. “There are traditions. Protocols. Hierarchies to establish.”
“There are… hierarchies for grandmothers?”
“Of COURSE there are. Someone has to be in charge.”
Gū Gū raised her tea. “It’s going to be me.”
“We’ll see about that, fox.”
“Oh, we will, ice queen.”
The two elderly women locked eyes. The temperature in the clearing fluctuated wildly.
Bai Yue buried her face in her hands.
~
By midday, Yàn Shū’s mother had still not arrived, much to Yàn Shū’s growing anxiety.
“she should be here by now,” he muttered, pacing. “Unless she got lost. She always gets lost. One time she got lost going to the river. The river that was visible from her hut.”
“She’ll be fine,” Bai Yue assured him.
“Will she? Will she REALLY? Because the last time she got lost, she ended up in crane territory and accidentally negotiated a trade alliance. She doesn’t even LIKE cranes!”
As the sun began its slow descent toward the treeline, Hán Bīng stood.
Everyone tensed.
She walked across the clearing until she stood directly in front of Bai Yue.
Bai Yue looked up at her. Tried not to gulp.
“You,” Hán Bīng said.
“…Yes?”
“Follow me.”
Bai Yue blinked. “What? Why?”
Hán Bīng’s eyebrow arched. “Don’t be silly. Follow me.”
“I’m not being silly, I’m asking for context! Why should I follow you? Where are we going? What’s happening?”
“You ask too many questions.”
“That’s a normal amount of questions for someone being told to follow a person they just met!”
Hán Bīng stared at her for a long, uncomfortable moment.
Then, very slightly, the corner of her mouth twitched.
“You have spirit,” she said. “Good. You’ll need it.”
“That doesn’t answer my question!”
“Follow me.” Hán Bīng turned and began walking toward the tree line. “Now. Before I change my mind.”
Bai Yue looked desperately at her husbands.
Han Shān looked as confused as she felt.
Zhāo Yàn shrugged helplessly.
Yàn Shū was too busy panicking about his mother to be useful.
Gū Gū just laughed.
“Go on, girl,” the fox grandmother cackled. “When an ice queen summons you, you go. It’s in the rules.”
“There are RULES?!”
“Of course there are rules. Now GO.”
Bai Yue took a deep breath. Let it out. Struggled to her feet, which took approximately three times longer than it used to.
Hán Bīng waited at the tree line, expression unreadable.
“I hate this,” Bai Yue muttered.
“You love it,” Yòu Lín called out helpfully. “Your face does the thing!”
“What thing?!”
“The happy-scared thing! Like when Papa does the special hugging!”
“YÒU LÍN.”
But Bai Yue was already waddling toward the tree line, toward her terrifying mother-in-law, toward whatever mysterious fate awaited her.
Source: Webnovel.com, updated by NovelKeep
Chapters
- Chapter 189: The Road Home
- Chapter 188: The end of a journey
- Chapter 187: Home
- Chapter 186: The Goddess’s Reluctant Apology
- Chapter 185: Terrible Emotional Intelligence
- Chapter 184: Alone in the Green
- Chapter 183: Back to Square One
- Chapter 182: Black Mirror River
- Chapter 181: Memory Wipe
- Chapter 180: The Great Remembrance
- Chapter 179: Robbery
- Chapter 178: The Shaman’s Shop
- Chapter 177: Crashout
- Chapter 176: Hunt For The Truth
- Chapter 175: Prom Pickup
- Chapter 174: The Scholar’s Son
- Chapter 173: The Clumsy Scholar
- Chapter 172: The Fox Who Didn’t Know Why He Called
- Chapter 171: Vanilla Dreams
- Chapter 170: Old Scars and New Sparks
- Chapter 169: Talk Over Matcha
- Chapter 168: Urgent Calls
- Chapter 167: Stars, Suits, and the Tiny Terror
- Chapter 166: The Goddess takes a Gamble
- Chapter 165: The Golden Prince’s Fury
- Chapter 164: The Hollow Crown
- Chapter 163: Run Toward the Sunrise
- Chapter 162: Death
- Chapter 161: The Ice That Would Not Come
- Chapter 160: The Breaking
- Chapter 159: The Hunter becomes the hunted
- Chapter 158: Queen of Ashes
- Chapter 157: The Crate
- Chapter 156: Scariest Scout
- Chapter 155: Rui Xue Alone
- Chapter 154: Headcount
- Chapter 153: Canopy Crash
- Chapter 152: Going to the Jungles
- Chapter 151: Courage Beyond Measure
- Chapter 150: Assassins!
- Chapter 149: The Shadow of the Jade
- Chapter 148: An Unseen Threat
- Chapter 147: The Jade Jaguar
- Chapter 146: The River Snapper Ambush
- Chapter 145: The Agony of Being Nine and Fluffy
- Chapter 144: Who is Tao Zi?
- Chapter 143: Lessons Learned(The Hard Way)
- Chapter 142: The Burning Sky Arrives
- Chapter 141: A Mother’s Fury
- Chapter 140: The Butterfly Problem
- Chapter 139: Little Moon On The Run
- Chapter 138: A Woman Scorned
- Chapter 137: The Weight of Leaving
- Chapter 136: Mother of My Cub
- Chapter 135: The Sight Of You
- Chapter 134: The Red Panda makes a Cub
- Chapter 133: The Art of Courtship
- Chapter 132: Mo Xiao of Thousand Fang
- Chapter 131: Gu Gu says Yes!
- Chapter 130: The Woman Who Fed Everyone
- Chapter 129: A Very Small Panda
- Chapter 128: The Snake Who Slept Too Long
- Chapter 127: The Hole Problem
- Chapter 126: Tumbling Down
- Chapter 125: Blood and Snow
- Chapter 124: The Magnificent Battle
- Chapter 123: The Art of the Pout
- Chapter 122: The Cubs and the Burning Sky
- Chapter 121: The Burning Sky Loses A Baby
- Chapter 120: The Ice Queen’s Blush
- Chapter 119: Night with the Fox
- Chapter 118: The Intruders Get Roasted(literally)
- Chapter 117: Intruders!
- Chapter 116: The Festival
- Chapter 115: Alone Time with Zhao Yan
- Chapter 114: Flirting with The Dusty Old Dragon
- Chapter 113: The Grandma Chronicles
- Chapter 112: Run For Your Life!
- Chapter 111: The Dragon Who Did Not Want Friends
- Chapter 110: Not The Monster I Expected
- Chapter 109: Breakfast With the Storm
- Chapter 108: The Other Woman
- Chapter 107: Another Dragon Friend
- Chapter 106: Elder Emberglow’s Past
- Chapter 105: The Adventures of The Two Cubs
- Chapter 104: The Dragon King Has A Crisis
- Chapter 103: The Sky That Burns
- Chapter 102: The Stormcrown’s Catch
- Chapter 101: The Dragon King’s Decree
- Chapter 100: The Storm in the Clouds
- Chapter 99: Another Dragon
- Chapter 98: The Postpartum Gift Shop Explosion
- Chapter 97: Storm Dragon Stamina
- Chapter 96: The Return of the Dragon Prince
- Chapter 95: The Tiny Tyrant of Thousand Fang
- Chapter 94: It’s a She!
- Chapter 93: Little Zhen Wakes Up
- Chapter 92: The Arrival of Little Zhen
- Chapter 91: Let’s Have a Baby
- Chapter 90: The Ice Queen’s Forgiveness
- Chapter 89: Electric Boogaloo
- Chapter 88: The Grandmother Gauntlet
- Chapter 87: The Longest Night
- Chapter 86: Very Unsolicited Baby Names
- Chapter 85: Thousand Fang Game Day
- Chapter 84: The Council of Chaos
- Chapter 83: The Bear Who Should Have Stayed Hibernating
- Chapter 82: The Cursed, Cranky, Very Pregnant Female
- Chapter 81: The Fox Who Heard Everything
- Chapter 80: A Night With The Snow Leopard
- Chapter 79: Flee Before the Turkeys
- Chapter 78: The Lemon Heist Gone Wrong
- Chapter 77: My Pheromone Soap Ruined Everything (A Cultivation Memoir)
- Chapter 76: Aphrodisiac Soap
- Chapter 75: I Know What To Do!
- Chapter 74: Cornered by the Leopard Lord
- Chapter 73: Is Papa Eating Mama
- Chapter 72: So Long, Sparkly Dragons
- Chapter 71: Peace Was Never an Option
- Chapter 70: Walking Was a Mistake
- Chapter 69: The Mandatory Honeymoon of Doom
- Chapter 68: Tiān-Mìng Pops In to Drop the Horniest Quest Log of All Time
- Chapter 67: Zhāo Yàn vs. Han Shān: Territorial Tug-of-War
- Chapter 66: The Third Husband
- Chapter 65: You Can Not Banish Her!
- Chapter 64: Talk to Your Traumatized Husband First
- Chapter 63: The Great Fur-pocalypse
- Chapter 62: Debt is Paid
- Chapter 61: One Smile
- Chapter 60: Chemical Warfare
- Chapter 59: The Draconic Contract
- Chapter 58: Spite Over Sense
- Chapter 57: Almost...
- Chapter 56: The Golden Squatter
- Chapter 55: The Territorial Kiss
- Chapter 54: The Dragon Princess and The New Pet
- Chapter 53: The Incoming Hurricane
- Chapter 52: I Am Going To Bed
- Chapter 51: Another Attempted Murder
- Chapter 50: Moon-Whisker Weed
- Chapter 49: The Tears of a Tiger
- Chapter 48: Did I Break Him?
- Chapter 47: Flying Dropkicks
- Chapter 46: Two Knuckle-Knocks and a Broken Brain
- Chapter 45: The First Son
- Chapter 44: Caught in 4K
- Chapter 43: Smells Like Swamp Mud
- Chapter 42: Of Swamp Noodles and Skincare Routines
- Chapter 41: The Feral Mother Strikes Again!
- Chapter 40: The Three-Headed Toddler
- Chapter 39: Trial by Performance
- Chapter 38: Trial by Performance
- Chapter 37: The Dragon Who Unknotted Things
- Chapter 36: Monkey Cuddles
- Chapter 35: The Concept of Privacy
- Chapter 34: The Golden Meltdown
- Chapter 33: Cāng Jì’s Worst Nightmare
- Chapter 32: Welcome to Monkey Hell
- Chapter 31: Aggressive Relocation
- Chapter 30: Wake Up, Lazy Raccoon!
- Chapter 29: I Am an Alpha (Please Pat My Head)
- Chapter 28: Dying Whales and Evil Carrots
- Chapter 27: A Ripple In The Ice
- Chapter 26: How to Train Your Dragon (With Honey Cakes and Emotional Blackmail)
- Chapter 25: Three Trials
- Chapter 24: The Monkey King’s Revenge
- Chapter 23: Attack of the Cubs!
- Chapter 22: Riddles in the Morning
- Chapter 21: Hot Springs and Cold Glares
- Chapter 20: The Uninvited Guest
- Chapter 19: The Return of the Snow Leopard
- Chapter 18: The High-Altitude Hitchhiker
- Chapter 17: The Dragon’s Shadow
- Chapter 16: The Wrath of Gū Gū
- Chapter 15: Grandma’s Stick of Truth
- Chapter 14: Death by Star-Fruit: A Snake Twin Special
- Chapter 13: Squeaky Clean Demon
- Chapter 12: The Fox’s Bath Time
- Chapter 11: Judgement is Passed
- Chapter 10: Mama
- Chapter 9: The Wrath of the "Demon"
- Chapter 8: Make Snowball Smile
- Chapter 7: Firelight Trial
- Chapter 6: The Snake Twins!
- Chapter 5: The Mission of the Smile
- Chapter 4: The Contagious Giggle
- Chapter 3: The Snow Leopard’s Cold Shoulder
- Chapter 2: Good Kitty
- Chapter 1: The Worst First Day Ever