Chapter Sixty-Seven – Definitely the Best Outcome
Jacob jumped as the door to the warehouse he was hiding in opened up, but his heart settled down as voices poured in. Specifically, the excited voices of half a dozen or so girls. “And then she was all like, ‘how’d you do that?’ and I was like, ‘because I’m the coolest bear ever.’”
“She didn’t say that!”
“She did!”
“I was there, you dumbest bear ever!”
“I was there too!”
“We know!”
Alea wasn’t sure if being rescued by the brat brigade was the best outcome after all. Now he had to deal with the kids being… themselves all around him some more. They were insufferable and annoying at the best of times. Maple was alright though, she was quiet and only wanted to build doomsday devices, which he could sympathise with.
Jacob stepped out of the shadows behind a tall stack of crates and then raised a hand to cover his face from the light shone on him by the girls. “Hey,” he said.
The warehouse Emily–or rather, the Boss– had left him in was just a block down from the one he’d been held at, but instead of a group of nefarious villains this one was mostly filled with crates and rows upon rows of dusty racks.
The lights lowered, and he found himself blinking to adjust his vision to the light. Emily had her phone out, flashlight mode on, and so did Glamazon. For that matter, all three of Trinity had phones with lights on too.
No one seemed ready to question where the racoon girl had gotten so many smartphones, so he wasn’t going to poke at that.
The Boss stepped up to him, then eyed him up and down. He felt a little exposed, standing before her while she checked him out as if he was a side of beef. There was no sympathy in her eyes. “You’re okay?” she asked.
“Uh, yeah, I’m fine,” he said. “A bit shaken up, but overall, not too bad. How did it go with the law?”
“Well enough. I think there was enough obvious evidence that something was wrong that we won’t be suspected of anything,” the Boss said.
As soon as they’d scared away that Spin-to-Win guy (who was, at the time, a woman? Jacob wasn’t sure what was going on there) they’d pulled him from the van and the Boss had gotten her brats to tie up the remaining mooks. Then they’d gone for ice cream. On the way, they’d shoved him into the warehouse he was still currently hiding in.
He didn’t even get a cone for himself, but he understood well enough. Some of the mooks might talk about him, and so they had to make it seem as if he was never with the ‘heroes’ in the first place.
If the Boss was asked, she could claim that he got away during the confusion, which had the benefit of being somewhat partially true… if he squinted really hard and didn’t pay attention to any pertinent details.
“That’s great,” he said while running a hand through his hair. “I don’t know how well my luck would hold out from here on.”
Emily nodded. “Right, that’s good. We’ll get you back home, don’t worry. Then you can continue to work on reforming yourself away from a life of villainy.”
He blinked. What was she talking about? Then the Boss very pointedly glanced to the side towards Glamazon, as if trying to say ‘this is for her.’
He caught on well enough. “Yeah, right. Just, trying to be a good person, you know? Haha.”
Glamazon stepped over, half her attention on the brats who started to run around the warehouse like kids on a sugar-rush, which he imagined they very much were. As long as they didn’t start throwing things around and someone kept an eye on Maple to stop her from building anything too dangerous then they were probably fine.
“We didn’t have time to meet properly,” Glamazon said. She extended a hand to him, and he jumped a bit before grabbing it for a shake. “I’m Glamazon.”
“Uh, hi,” he said. He tried on a smile. “I’m Alea Iacta. Um, we kind of met, once before.”
“Yes, I remember chasing after you,” she said. Her grip tightened and her eyes narrowed. “You were making a ruckus in the middle of the city.”
“In my defence, I’d just gotten cool new powers and had to try them out,” he said while giving the best ‘boys will be boys’ kind of shrug he could manage. “It was kind of exciting. But I made sure not to hurt anyone.”
Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.
“Uh-huh,” Glamazon said. “And now you’re on the straight and narrow?”
“Well, I’m certainly straight,” he replied with a grin.
She didn’t think he was very funny.
“Look, getting powers was cool and all, but it hasn’t exactly made my life simpler. Right now I’m basically on the run from what I think might be a super villain organisation, and the only one keeping me safe is the Boss. I’m just a guy who’s sometimes a little lucky. I guess that luck let me meet the Boss and things have been… interesting since.”
Glamazon sighed. “Yeah, that’s fair.”
Emily nodded. “Right, you two keep chatting or whatever. I need to make a call or two. I think our ride home might be scrap, so… yeah, it’s going to be a walk. Alea, we’ll try to find a way to get you back to the, uh, base.”
“Cool, cool,” he said while the Boss walked off. She was probably going to keep an eye on her sisters too. “So, what’s it like, being a big-time heroine?”
Glamazon snorted. She was kinda cute, he noticed, now that she wasn’t chasing him through the streets while flinging explosives at his heels. “I’m not a big-time anything. The more time I spend in this business, the more I feel like I’m just a small-fry.”
“Tell me about it,” he said. “I thought my powers were kind of neat, but then, yeah, they’re not all that awesome in the end.”
“Luck powers seem pretty strong,” she said.
“Maybe one day, but right now it feels kind of underwhelming.” He’d actually gotten a skill upgrade from escaping, but he wasn’t sure if it was going to be all that potent a change.
Glamazon nodded. “Yeah, I know what you mean.” She glanced over to the Boss who was wagging her fingers at a group of chastised brats. “Some people get really lucky, you know?”
He laughed. “Oh, please, don’t look at her like that. I think she’s the least lucky one here.”
“Really?” Glamazon asked.
“Would you want to be responsible for all of that?” He waved in the Boss’ general direction.
Glamazon considered it for a second, then winced. “Okay, fair point. It’s a lot of responsibility, and it’s probably not all that easy to begin with.”
“Yeah. I don’t think I’d want to deal with all of that,” he said. “She’s not that terrible otherwise. Scary as hell though.”
“The Boss?” Glamazon asked.
“Oh yeah. She’s got that like… repressed madwoman vibe going on. Like she’s one bad day from burning the city down.”
Glamazon laughed, just a low chuckle that didn’t carry much. “You have a high opinion of the hero that saved you.”
Right, he reminded himself that Glamazon didn’t know that Emily was a capital V Villain, fledgeling criminal empire and all. “She’s not a bad sort. Just very intense, I guess.”
“Yeah, I felt that too. I thought she was a bit of a pushover at first, but I guess that was all just an act, huh?”
He nodded. That made sense. Emily was pretending to be all shy and anxious, but in reality, she was a stone-cold killer in disguise. It fit everything he knew about the woman. “So, you joining her crew too?”
“Me? Oh, no, I’m not. This was a one-off. A favour. She needed help so I came along. I’m signed on with the HRT you know?”
“How’s that?” he asked.
“It’s okay? They mostly want new heroes to do patrols and look pretty for the media. It’s not great for gaining experience. I think I earned more of that tonight than in all the previous time I spent as a hero. It’s not surprising that the Boss and her brats are so far ahead if this is what they do all the time.”
“Yeah, they’re a bit wild,” he said. “Still, it sounds like a safer job than whatever this is.”
“Oh, totally,” she agreed. “I’ll take my winnings and lay low for a while, I think. But tonight was fun. I’m glad we were able to save you.”
“Me too,” he said. Then, even though he wasn’t feeling particularly lucky, he did something that he usually wouldn’t. “So… you like coffee?”
She laughed again, then stared at him for a moment. “You know, maybe I do.”
“Really? Because I know this great place…”
***
Source: Webnovel.com, updated by NovelKeep
Chapters
- Chapter Fifty-Seven - Aftermath
- Chapter Fifty-Six - Mirror Man
- Chapter Fifty-Five - Nothing Ever Happens
- Chapter Fifty-Four - A Bad Omen
- Chapter Fifty-Three - Toy Shop
- Chapter Fifty-Two - Lessons Sorta Learned
- Chapter Fifty-One - Rough Day
- Chapter Fifty - What to Do
- Chapter Forty-Nine - The Taste of Victory
- Chapter Forty-Eight - The Wrong Kind of Spark
- Chapter Forty-Seven - Buzzing
- Chapter Forty-Six - Pushing the Attack
- Chapter Forty-Five - Bothered
- Chapter Forty-Four - Progress
- Chapter Forty-Three - The Search, The One in Black
- Fluff - Volume Three is Out!
- Chapter Forty-Two - Recap (It Could Have Been an Email)
- Chapter Forty-One - Meeting
- Chapter Forty - Entering Again
- Chapter Thirty-Nine - Chill
- Chapter Thirty-Eight - Maple's Marvelous Makings
- Chapter Thirty-Seven - Orbjective
- Chapter Thirty-Six - Late Night Anxiety
- Chapter Thirty-Five - Regroup, Recoup, Revenge
- Chapter Thirty-Four - The Perfect Opportunity
- Chapter Thirty-Three - The Thing is There
- Chapter Thirty-Two - Ready
- Chapter Thirty-One - Trinity the Sneaky
- Chapter Thirty - Scouting by Night
- Chapter Twenty-Nine - Planning Ahead
- Chapter Twenty-Eight - Sam and Trinity
- Chapter Twenty-Seven - The Guard Routine
- Chapter Twenty-Six - Good Things
- Chapter Twenty-Five - Enrichment
- Chapter Twenty-Four - Additional Testing
- Chapter Twenty-Three - Refreshed
- Chapter Twenty-Two - Maple's Dream Come True
- Chapter Twenty-One - How the Heroes Do It
- Chapter Twenty - Perk Up
- Chapter Nineteen - Entering Endgame... Again?
- Chapter Eighteen - Robber Points
- Chapter Seventeen - Entering the Endgame
- Chapter Sixteen - Not Exhausted, but Close
- Chapter Fifteen - Fun for Teddy
- Chapter Fourteen - Getting There
- Chapter Thirteen - Sing Song
- Chapter Twelve - All In
- Chapter Eleven - Laying it Out
- Chapter Ten - Blanked Out
- Chapter Nine - Pencils Down
- Chapter Eight - The Biggest Little Sister!
- Chapter Seven - Walkies
- Chapter Six - Social Pressure
- Chapter Five - Snack Attack
- Chapter Four - Crinkle Fries
- Chapter Three - The Worker
- Chapter Two - Not Getting Involved
- Chapter One - Serious Mode!
- Prologue - Volume Four
- Chapter Sixty-Nine - Glowing Betrayal
- Chapter Sixty-Eight - Commiserate
- Chapter Sixty-Seven - The New Girl
- Chapter Sixty-Six - The Grand Bosses
- Chapter Sixty-Five - Hover Mode
- Chapter Sixty-Four - Borealis
- Chapter Sixty-Three - Moosin' Around
- Chapter Sixty-Two - Hollow
- Chapter Sixty-One - Properly Shook
- Chapter Sixty - Easy Peasy
- Chapter Fifty-Nine - Booger Brain
- Chapter Fifty-Eight - Don't Wanna Do It
- Chapter Fifty-Seven - Jezebelle the Brave
- Chapter Fifty-Six - The Sleepy
- Chapter Fifty-Five - In Want of a Plan
- Chapter Fifty-Four - PR
- Chapter Fifty-Three - Unhurt
- Chapter Fifty-Two - Coifed?
- Chapter Fifty-One - Up to Something
- Chapter Fifty - Sickly Sorts
- Chapter Forty-Nine - Wanna Go
- Chapter Forty-Eight - Cheater?
- Chapter Forty-Seven - Gyms and Abstracts
- Chapter Forty-Six - Rolling
- Chapter Forty-Five - Toy Soldiers
- Chapter Forty-Four - Powers
- Chapter Forty-Three - Bar Hopping
- Chapter Forty-Two - Bad Vibes
- Chapter Forty-One - Not One Bit
- Chapter Forty - The Angry Rattler
- Chapter Thirty-Nine - Doing This
- Chapter Thirty-Eight - No Worries
- Chapter Thirty-Seven - Big Sister Still Loves You
- Chapter Thirty-Six - Athena's Trashy Morning
- Chapter Thirty-Five -Landfill/Paradise
- Chapter Thirty-Four - Dreaming Big
- Chapter Thirty-Three - School Smarts
- Chapter Thirty-Two - Expendable in School
- Chapter Thirty-One - Bears Just Wanna Bear
- Chapter Thirty - Bundle of Worry
- Chapter Twenty-Nine - Steffie's Mom, and Also Steffie's Legs
- Chapter Twenty-Eight - Guilt
- Chapter Twenty-Seven - Betrayal
- Chapter Twenty-Six - The Report
- Chapter Twenty-Five - Masks Off
- Chapter Twenty-Four - Skill Check
- Chapter Twenty-Three - Concern
- Chapter Twenty-Two - Three Jobs
- Chapter Twenty-One - Chi-cane-ry
- Chapter Twenty - Gift Giving
- Chapter Nineteen - Charity Case
- Chapter Eighteen - Beaver Shopping
- Chapter Seventeen - Pulling the Funds out of Fundraisers
- Chapter Sixteen - Debrief
- Chapter Fifteen - Rapscallion
- Chapter Fourteen - Mapley Mood
- Chapter Thirteen - Run In With Rattles
- Chapter Twelve - Head Minion
- Chapter Eleven - The Pizza Place
- Chapter Ten - Minion Meeting
- Chapter Nine - Train Station
- Chapter Eight - Recruitment Drive By
- Chapter Seven - Minion Hunting
- Chapter Six - Banking the Villain Way
- Chapter Five - Predictable
- Chapter Four - Hospital Visit
- Chapter Three - Gossip
- Chapter Two - Kevin
- Chapter One - Smoggy
- Fluff 2 is Out! Fluff 3 News!
- Fluff Halloween Special
- Chapter Sixty-Nine - Sugar Rush Crash
- Chapter Sixty-Eight - Keeping it Up
- Chapter Sixty-Seven - Definitely the Best Outcome
- Chapter Sixty-Six - Yet Another Call
- Chapter Sixty-Five - Toast and Ice Cream
- Chapter Sixty-Four - Spinning But Still Losing
- Chapter Sixty-Three - Pride Begets Fear
- Chapter Sixty-Two - Healpats For All!
- Chapter Sixty-One - An Invitation for Heroism
- Chapter Sixty - The Frustration of Falling Apart
- Chapter Fifty-Nine - You're Locked In Here With Me
- Chapter Fifty-Eight - I'm Not Locked In Here With You
- Chapter Fifty-Seven - The Wrong Sort of Nap
- Chapter Fifty-Six - Unflippable, Unflappable
- Chapter Fifty-Five - Paying the Price
- Chapter Fifty-Four - Chaotic Evil Children
- Chapter Fifty-Three - Generic Desires for the Future
- Chapter Fifty-Two - The Interview
- Chapter Fifty-One - Racket-Making
- Chapter Fifty - Discreet as Usual
- Chapter Forty-Nine - Owl of Her Attention
- Chapter Forty-Eight - Reading the Room
- Chapter Forty-Seven - Payphone
- Chapter Forty-Six - Railgun (Technically more of a coilgun, but it fires toast, so whatever)
- Chapter Forty-Five - Toaster
- Chapter Forty-Four - No One Special
- Chapter Forty-Three - The Sapling
- Chapter Forty-Two - Mad Skills
- Chapter Forty-One - Perfect Plots
- Chapter Forty - Time to Go
- Chapter Thirty-Nine - Melaton's Talk
- Chapter Thirty-Eight - A Perfectly Reasonable Escalation
- Chapter Thirty-Seven - All Out
- Chapter Thirty-Six - Wherein Everything Goes Terribly Wrong
- Chapter Thirty-Five - Hasty Plans
- Chapter Thirty-Four - Confrontational Meetings
- Chapter Thirty-Three - Cement's Legacy
- Chapter Thirty-Two - Next Steps
- Chapter Thirty-One - Right as Rain
- Chapter Thirty - Rising Expectations
- Chapter Twenty-Nine - Fabien the Fabulous
- Chapter Twenty-Eight - The Lucky Boy
- Chapter Twenty-Seven - As Subtle as a Sledgehammer to the Nose
- Chapter Twenty-Six - Doing Something
- Chapter Twenty-Five - A Bit of Quiet
- Chapter Twenty-Four - We All Scream
- Chapter Twenty-Three - The Little Adventures of Steffie
- Chapter Twenty-Two - Convincing Arguments
- Chapter Twenty-One - Busy City
- Chapter Twenty - Putting the Super in Villain
- Chapter Nineteen - Mobile Base
- Chapter Eighteen - Metro
- Chapter Seventeen - A Sneaky Peak
- Chapter Sixteen - Traits
- Chapter Fifteen - Maddening Skills
- Chapter Fourteen - Public Relations
- Chapter Thirteen - The Good Guys
- Chapter Twelve - All Chained Up
- Chapter Eleven - Iron Chains
- Chapter Ten - Rattle
- Chapter Nine - The Simplest Plans
- Chapter Eight - Sisterly Love
- Chapter Seven - Racket
- Chapter Six - Definitely Not Extortion
- Chapter Five - Thesis
- Chapter Four - Doing what’s Probably Right
- Chapter Three - Hyperactivity
- Chapter Two - A Much Needed Break
- Chapter One - The Talk
- Prologue
- Fluff - Volume Two
- Afterword
- Epilogue
- Chapter Seventy-Three - Interrogations
- Chapter Seventy-Two - Reversal
- Chapter Seventy-One - Getting Saucy
- Chapter Seventy - Up and Over
- Chapter Sixty-Nine - Tippy-Toe Thief
- Chapter Sixty-Eight - Breaking and Entering
- Chapter Sixty-Seven - Entirely Fine
- Chapter Sixty-Six - Costume Shopping
- Chapter Sixty-Five - Single With End Unseen
- Old Epilogue (No Longer Canon)
- Chapter Sixty-Four - Trinity and Toaster-Kun Kissing in a Tree
- Chapter Sixty-Three - Triple Threat
- Chapter Sixty-Two - Imposing
- Chapter Sixty-One - Confidence
- Chapter Sixty - Being Clever
- Chapter Fifty-Nine - Catching the Mouse
- Chapter Fifty-Eight - Call
- Chapter Fifty-Seven - Inattention
- Chapter Fifty-Six - Tense
- Chapter Fifty-Five - The Uncomplicated Art of Subtlety (According to Athena)
- Chapter Fifty-Four - Questing for a Bear
- Chapter Fifty-Three - Healpats
- What’s A Christmas Anyway?
- Chapter Fifty-Two - Complicated Conversations
- Chapter Fifty-One - An Undisclosed Chat
- Chapter Fifty - Riding Owl Night
- Chapter Forty-Nine - No Rest for the Not-So-Wicked
- Chapter Forty-Eight - Unwise
- Chapter Forty-Seven - Economic Theory According to Teddy
- Chapter Forty-Six - Endemic
- Chapter Forty-Five - Hoo You Are Deep Inside
- Chapter Forty-Four - Heroic Introductions
- Chapter Forty-Three - Crisis of Personowlity
- Chapter Forty-Two - Buckle Up
- Chapter Forty-One - Knots
- Chapter Forty - Everyone Poops
- Chapter Thirty-Nine - A Mouthful
- Chapter Thirty-Eight - Nom Nom de Guerre
- Chapter Thirty-Seven - Bonding
- Chapter Thirty Six - A Receipt for Ulcers
- Chapter Thirty-Five - Paranowl Activities
- Chapter Thirty-Four - The Rules
- Chapter Thirty-Three - Victory
- Chapter Thirty-Two - Garage
- Chapter Thirty-One - Ready Teddy
- Chapter Thirty - Gentle Persuasion
- Chapter Twenty-Nine - Harald
- Chapter Twenty-Eight - A Perfectly Ordinary Day
- Chapter Twenty-Seven - Bearing the Burden of Being the Best Bear
- Chapter Twenty-Six - Just Along for the Ride
- Chapter Twenty-Five - Sleepy Time
- Chapter Twenty-Four - The Ropes
- Chapter Twenty-Three - Melaton
- Chapter Twenty-Two - Plastic Bear Masks
- Chapter Twenty-One - Costuming Up
- Chapter Twenty - Backstage
- Chapter Nineteen - Teddy’s Adventure in Costume-Finding
- Chapter Eighteen - Sisterportation
- Chapter Seventeen - Homie and the Try Hards
- Chapter Sixteen - Midnight Meeting
- Chapter Fifteen - A Cryptic Request
- Chapter Fourteen - An Adorable Misunderstanding
- Chapter Thirteen - An Interrogation or Two
- Chapter Twelve - Voluntary
- Chapter Eleven - A Queen of Sorts
- Chapter Ten - Born Knowing
- Chapter Nine - Bearable Threats
- Chapter Eight - Shady Dealings
- Chapter Seven - Long Distance Comforts
- Chapter Six - Being Blankets
- Chapter Five - Honey Glazed Blackmail
- Chapter Four - When in Doubt, Look it Up
- Chapter Three - The Smallest Barbearian
- Chapter Two - Don’t Panic
- Chapter One - Wake Up
- Prologue - Anxiety