Chapter 188 – Not All Walls Can Be “Dig” Through
“Hah, hah, hah, HOLY SHIT!” John said to himself, now back in his leathers. He was inside a restroom stall, having just squeezed through a hole he created with Dig and resealed the opening. He collapsed on the toilet and rested his head in his hands, trying to calm himself down.
When he drove away from Mt Lady and Rumi, he turned down another corridor and into an exhibit room. After casting darkness over a pair of cameras, he put the motorcycle away and used Dig on the wall, making a pocket he could squeeze into. It appeared to be a narrow utility corridor, so he sealed himself up, and once he was sure there were no cameras again, he deactivated his armour. He followed some waterlines until they branched into a wall, then dug his way through that wall as well, ending up in this stall.
That sword was… alive. No… not alive, but it had spirits within it. They didn’t control me, but they showed me how to move and activated the sword’s abilities for me. It was like there were Quirks embedded right inside the blade. I know I joked about my gatcha weapons being Quirk weapons, but apparently, there really are Quirk weapons. And that gem in its hilt… that thing is pure nightmare fuel. Hell may or may not exist, but that is the only thing I can compare it to.
When the fight was over, and he sheathed the sword, it spoke to him briefly. It thanked him for saving Mei, its previous wielder’s daughter and true-blooded member of House Takeyama. It lamented the fact that he already had a bonded sword, but assured him that the Sword of Truth was indeed a worthy companion for a Paladin such as himself and could indeed exceed even its own powers. Finally, it told him that the Takeyama bloodline was thinning and could use a good infusion from a powerful Paladin bloodline like his. John just chuckled at that last one, still coming down from his combat high.
After handing off the sword to Yu, he tried to leave, but then Rumi attacked him. He felt the power of that weapon infuse him once again, and he managed to knock her out with a single blow.
There is no way in hell I could do that normally; this infusion thing it did was just plain incredible. And that teleporting? Or whatever it was would be incredibly useful. If I could only learn that somehow. Maybe in the gatcha draws? My luck, I would get something else silly, like basket weaving. Oh well.
He raised his hand and focused his mana on it, causing flames to engulf it. He clenched his fist a few times, nodding at the feeling. He might not be able to teleport, but the short time with that blade taught him how to imbue himself with his own magic. Whatever that Quirk was, it was based on something similar to mana.
Cancelling the spell, he stood up and left the stall. Taking a moment to tidy up his appearance, he considered his options. He wasn’t sure if he got away cleanly this time, but he was going to feign innocence for the time being.
He stepped out of the restroom and looked around, trying to get his bearings. He was in an unfamiliar hallway, apparently one of many that they hadn’t explored that morning. No surprise there, the museum was gigantic. It would take nearly a week to see everything it had on display.
Choosing a random direction, he started walking. He had no idea how he was going to excuse his actions and explain where he had disappeared to, but that didn’t matter too much. He would just have to wing it, and if this was the moment he was found out, well, he always could return to DEN.
He somehow made his way back to the main entrance, where there were a dozen police officers carting off the three villains that he had knocked out. Rumi and Yu were also there, chatting with a pair of people in suits, whom John assumed were detectives because of the badges hanging from their lanyards.
“MR. WAYNE!!!” A voice shouted, and suddenly John was struck by a pink-haired missile. He was knocked backwards and onto the floor as Mei clung to him tightly, her boots making a whirling noise like a jet engine winding down.
“Good to see you too, kiddo.” He said with a chuckle, hugging her back. “Glad to see you’re safe.”
“How did you get away? Did you meet the Twilight Knight? Did you know he killed that villain with my mother’s sword? And he has a motorcycle that seems to be able to disappear? What do you think his armour is made out of? It blocked all the acid that the villain was spewing everywhere.”
“Easy, kiddo. I briefly glanced at him while I was getting away, that’s it. How did you know what he did?”
“Easy, I just opened the security cameras on my tablet.” She replied, sitting up on him and pulling out the tablet. She showed him a camera picture of him in the utility corridor, swapping from TK to John. She then hit the delete button, erasing the video, then hugged him again. “We can talk later, but for now, thank you. Thank you for saving my life.” She whispered in his ear.
Crap, I missed a camera! Wait, is she hiding my secret?
John was stunned and didn’t get a chance to recover before Yu and Rumi walked over to him. Rumi was frowning at him for some reason, while Yu had an unreadable expression on her face. She was still holding the sword in her hands, the blade seeming to be once again dormant. He thought he heard a faint cackle of laughter in his mind, like the spirits in the sword were laughing at his predicament.
“Umm, howdy you two. Did you get them?” He asked, sitting up. Mei still didn’t let go of him, staying spider monkeyed around his body.
“We got some of them. I heard you managed to nearly get yourself killed by attacking one from behind.” Rumi said, still frowning.
“Well, I couldn’t let him kill anyone else, not if I could stop it.”
“Hmm… Well, you’re lucky the detectives here are quite understanding. Since I still haven’t registered you as my sidekick yet, they will let it slide, but we are heading over to the HPSC after this to get you legalized to do hero work.”
“What?” He said, blindsided by her statement.
“We will talk later, after you give them your statement. Now, I think our newest student has something to say to you.” Rumi said, then gestured to Yu.
Student?
Yu didn’t say anything at first, then knelt beside John and embraced him and her daughter. “Thank you for saving my daughter’s life. I have no words, just thank you!” She said, then started to cry. He embraced her as well, hugging both mother and daughter tightly.
He had no idea what in the world was happening here, and Rumi was still glaring down at him for some reason, but it seemed that he got away cleanly. For the most part.
That Evening
Jaku City
*Wack*
“Ouch, damnit!”
“Keep your guard up!”
“I am! Are you trying to break my arm?”
“Toughen up, buttercup. Now, come at me again!”
John and Rumi had been sparing in the dojo for some time. John wasn’t sure what exactly had happened today that changed her attitude, but she was being way more intense than she usually was. A cursory use of Scouter didn’t tell him much, and she wasn’t really in a talking mood right now to see if he could draw out what was really going on.
Earlier, he had given a statement to the detectives that he had hidden within the walls of the museum to get away from the fighting. They hadn’t asked how he managed to do that; they were more concerned with the fact that he had put his own life in jeopardy to try to fight Toxic Chainsaw. The man hadn’t been seen in years, and most had thought he was dead, famously escaping from All Might years ago. Apparently, the man could choose to spew a variety of acids and poisons from the blade of his chainsaw, able to enfeeble even the strongest heroes if they touched it.
John sweated a bit at that; the only reason he wasn’t killed was that the man had decided he wanted to toy with his prey like some sadistic cat.
Afterwards, Rumi, Yu, and Mei went to the Hero Public Safety Commission, where she registered her dojo as a hero agency, with her and Yu as founding members and John listed as their sidekick. She grumbled a bit about wanting to work alone, but when he questioned why she was doing this, she just said it was for the best. All Scouter said was that she was going to train them hard to become the best hero agency in Japan.
That’s when they split up, Yu saying she needed to return to the Takeyama estate with Mei for a bit, but would be back to train with them tomorrow evening. Mei had given him another hug, then they left John alone with a very irritated rabbit woman.
*Wack* *Thunk*
John sprawled to the ground, having just blocked a tornado kick Rumi hit him with, leaving his arm numb from the impact.
“Rumi! I don’t have super strength!”
“No? You managed to do something pretty incredible earlier, didn’t you? Get up! Show me how you beat that man!”
“Grrr! I tackled him from behind, hitting the back of his knees. I didn’t stand toe to toe with him.”
“Yeah, but you would have, wouldn’t you? Show me! Show me your resolve! Otherwise, I am just going to keep beating you senseless.” She replied, assuming a defensive stance, beckoning him to attack her again.
He slapped the ground, bounding to his feet again, then assumed a fighting stance she had shown him. He infused his body with his healing magic, chanting the spell in his mind rather than speaking it aloud. After playing with infusion earlier, he discovered he could do this now. He then channelled the mana throughout his body, strengthening his joints somehow. It wasn’t a spell, but he seemed to be a bit lighter on his feet, a bit faster, a bit stronger.
He was still no match for Rumi yet, not by a long shot, but he could feel that the gap was closing. What he needed was time, time to train these new skills that the sword had shown him. Time to grow stronger. Time this sadistic rabbit didn’t seem to want to give him.
He quickly closed the distance, faking a punch before tossing a front kick towards her, then leaned back as her foot nearly collided with his head. He stepped in after it and ducked, almost catching her heel to his temple again as she brought that same leg backwards. He tried to punch her calf as it passed, but her other leg had already come up and snapped towards his ribs, forcing him to block instead.
She is just so damn fast!
He snapped a couple of quick jabs at her, then tried to catch her next kick. He managed to grab it, but the sheer power behind it sent him to the ground. She landed on his chest and started to punch his face, forcing him to cover his head with his arms. He bucked his legs upwards and managed to get one around her neck for half a breath, but she somehow did a backflip from that kneeling position and landed by his feet.
“The hell is going on, Rumi? Are you trying to kill me?”
“Kill you? No. I’m just forcing you to be honest with me. When were you going to tell me?”
“Tell you what?”
Does she know too?
“Apparently, you’re not ready yet. No matter, get up. I’ll beat it out of you yet!”
“I thought you were the straightforward one!” He said, standing again, cycling his healing magic.
“Oh? I’m the straightforward one? Now I’m curious about how many other women my apprentice might have on the go. Now, come at me.”
Women? What in the world is she talking about? I don’t have any women in this world.
Scouter once again told him nothing, just how she was waiting for him to attack again, and what she would use to counter.
“Are you jealous that Yu hugged me for saving her daughter?” He asked.
“Come at me, John Wayne. Show me your resolve.” She said, not rising to his bait.
“Fine. Let’s dance, partner.” He said, adding a wind element to the mana he was cycling through his body. He had no idea whether it would make him faster or not, but he was willing to try anything at this point.
They collided again, his fist moving even faster as he seemed to be able to keep up with Rumi. Her eyes flashed surprise for a moment, but her sadistic grin finally returned to her face, and she sped up even more. “That’s it, John! Show me! Show me what the blood of the Bates can do!”
He ducked down under another roundhouse kick, then slammed his fist into one of her breasts, causing her to bounce back. He charged forward, intent on following through on the attack, but another foot connected with his chin, sending him flying backward. He crashed into the floor, his vision going blurry.
A shadow crept over him, and he felt Rumi straddle his torso. He started moving his arms to block the incoming punches, but she grabbed them and pinned them above his head.
“It’s been a long time since anyone has landed a hit on me.” She said, her face dangerously close to his. “Well done.” She then leaned in and kissed him on the lips. It was just a simple kiss, no tongue invading his mouth, but it was completely unexpected.
“Did you let me hit you?” He asked, still disoriented.
“Maybe a little, but you did surprise me with that burst of speed and caught me unprepared, so I think you deserved the reward. Be ready, John. I won’t be going easy on you again.” She said, then kissed him again before getting off of him and offering him a hand up. “Now, let’s get you practicing on your footwork. It’s sloppy as hell, and I won’t have any apprentice of mine fighting criminals without knowing how to move properly.”
“Right.” He replied, taking her offered hand. He guessed she thought his heroics earlier were due to the blood he shared with his sister, and wanted him to bring that side out in his training. He had no other explanation at this point, though he would continue to listen to her thoughts with Scouter later on.
Maybe I’m just worried she figured me out. I need to stop being so concerned about that. If it happens, I’ll just roll with the punches as I did in other worlds. What is the worst that can happen?
Musutafu
Takeyama Estate
“You say he used Godslayer to defeat that villain, and it didn’t reject him?” A woman asked, holding said sword in her hands.
“Yes, mother. It even allowed him to use The God Stone to seal his soul away.” Yu replied, kneeling before her mother’s throne. Hinata Takeyama wasn’t an actual queen, but might as well be with the power she wielded. She was an ancient woman, over seven hundred years old, but didn’t look a day over thirty. She was similar in appearance to Yu, though her hair was even lighter, a platinum blonde that bordered on white, and her eyes were crystal blue.
“Is he a Paladin? I thought they had all perished.” She replied, then looked down at her daughter. “Oh, stand up, Yu. Come here and hug your mother. It’s been so long since you returned home. I missed you.”
“Mom.” She replied, then embraced her. “I missed you, too. Sorry for bringing shame to the family name.”
“Nonsense. You just needed to grow up a bit more.” She replied, then sniffed her. “Do I smell a man on you? Has my daughter finally found someone?”
“What? No! Just…” She explained what had happened the rest of the day at the museum, though she was sure her mother already had the official reports. It was her place after all. If anything, it was surprising that she hadn’t activated her Quirk and dealt with the problem herself.
“Ahh, good. I’m glad to see you will finally be taking your training seriously. I’d like to meet this man sometime soon and thank him for saving my granddaughter from that villain. How about you bring him to the ball in three weeks? I had intended to introduce you to a few people there, but I think it would be good to bring him as your date instead.”
“What? You want me to ask him out on a date?”
Her mother trilled a little, “Ha, honestly, Yu. It’s just a ball. I’m not asking you to marry the man.”
“I guess that won’t be a problem.”
“Good. Now, tell me, how did you convince Mirko to…”
They talked for a good while more, bringing Mei into the room to see her grandmother. After an hour, they departed, needing to return home with her daughter so she could sleep and attend school the next day.
After they left the throne room, Hinata held the sword before her, nodding at something her ancestors were telling her. This Paladin, John Wayne, had a bunch of secrets, and it was now her problem to deal with.
“Not of this world, hun? Well, you two may have given him the green light, but he will have to convince me that he is worthy of my daughter.” She said to the sword, then hung it beside her throne.
She had only wielded it once; the weapon did not entirely reject her, but it did not accept her as its new owner. Anyone not of the Takeyama family who picked it up, who it deemed unworthy, would be incinerated by its power. The villain earlier was only allowed to touch it because it could sense a Paladin nearby and wanted to get closer to investigate. That was why she had no problem with the sword being displayed alongside her deceased daughter’s hero outfit.
She would keep it close by for now, sensing that things were changing in this world and that she might need the weapon again soon.
Source: Webnovel.com, updated by NovelKeep
Chapters
- Chapter 216 – ♥♥♥ Turning The Tables On A Crazy Rabbit
- Chapter 215 – Insanity Is The Spice Of Life
- Chapter 214 – Elders And Kids Say The Darndest Things
- Chapter 213 – Breakfast And A Show
- Chapter 212 – The Power Of Hunger
- Chapter 211 – The Hunger Grows And The Doctor Strikes
- Chapter 210 – Deviants And Dragons
- Chapter 209 – Dancing His Way Into Women’s Hearts
- Chapter 208 – Growing Respect
- Chapter 207 – Sibling Rivalry
- Chapter 206 – It’s The Results That Count
- Chapter 205 – ♥♥♥ Tenderized Glazed Rabbit
- Chapter 204 – An Unexpected Dinner And A Show
- Chapter 203 – Forethought, Foresight, And Family
- Chapter 202 – The Hero Behind A Mask
- Chapter 201 – Twilight Tears
- Chapter 200 – A Connoisseur Of The Arts
- Chapter 199 – Rising Infernos
- Chapter 198 – Life As A Side Character
- Chapter 197 – Feelings And Egg-cellence
- Chapter 196 – Spicy Dinner Conversations With A Side Of Self-Reflection
- Chapter 195 – Personal Space Is Overrated
- Chapter 194 – Ruminations Of A Rabbit
- Chapter 193 – Carrots And Confessions
- Chapter 192 – Eye Spy With My Little Eye Something That Begins With T
- Chapter 191 – Offers From A Rambling Grandma
- Chapter 190 – Keep An Eye Open When Probing For Mines
- Chapter 189 – She Is A Little eXtra
- Chapter 188 – Not All Walls Can Be “Dig” Through
- Chapter 187 – The Paladin Without A Plan
- Chapter 186 – The Other Side Of The Mountain
- Chapter 185 – Crazy Comes In All Shapes And Sizes
- Chapter 184 – The Difficulties Of Staying On Topic
- Chapter 183 – Sometimers Strikes Again
- Chapter 182 – The Good And The Bad
- Chapter 181 – A Carrot A Day
- Chapter 180 – One Of A Kind
- Chapter 179 – The Night That Luna Fell
- Chapter 178 – A Time For Tea
- Chapter 177 – Sagely Advice
- Chapter 176 – The Rules Of The Game
- Chapter 175 – Escape From U.S.J.
- Chapter 174 – Twilight’s Herald
- Chapter 173 – A Mountain Of Trouble
- Chapter 172 – ♥♥ Clams, Catfolk, And Catnip
- Chapter 171 – For Science!
- Chapter 170 – The Problems With Pelicans
- Chapter 169 – Gunship Diplomacy
- Chapter 168 – Don’t Look A Gift Horse In The Mouth
- Chapter 167 – The Steel Within
- Chapter 166 – ♥♥ Unexpected Consequences
- Chapter 165 – Ignorance Was Bliss
- Chapter 164 – But Wait! There’s More!
- Chapter 163 – Be All That You Don’t Want To Be!
- Chapter 162 – It is Elemental, My Dear John
- Chapter 161 – Dancing With Wolves
- Chapter 160 – Giving Those Naughty Puppies A Whipping
- Chapter 159 – When The Cheap Sunglasses Finally Broke
- Chapter 158 – Honour Is A Heavy Burden To Bear
- Chapter 157 – ♥♥ A Broken Angel In His Arms
- Chapter 156 – Planning, Trauma, And The Mysteries Of A Red Cup
- Chapter 155 – With Eyes Wide Open
- Chapter 154 – ♥ Growing Problems With Communication
- Chapter 153 – One Oath Is As Good As Another, Right?
- Chapter 152 – Predatory Pirate Vs A Wrathful Wizard
- Chapter 151 – The Wizard Of Blackstone
- Chapter 150 – A John A Day Keeps The Doctor Away
- Chapter 149 – Out Of The Frying Pan
- Chapter 148 – A Dangling Thread Of Intrigue
- Chapter 147 – An Anger Fueled By Nuclear Fires
- Chapter 146 – Rock’em, Sock’em, 3049
- Chapter 145 – With Bated Breath
- Chapter 144 – Kinder Surprise Toys Just Ain’t What They Used To Be
- Chapter 143 – ♥♥♥ The Maiden Who Came To The Villain Of DEN
- Chapter 142 – Kids Say The Darndest Things
- Chapter 141 – What Goes Bump In The Middle Of The Afternoon
- Chapter 140 – The Angry Little Landmine That Could
- Chapter 139 – Slow Dance With A Cannon Opener
- Chapter 138 – A HEAP Of Trouble
- Chapter 137 – Snakes Have No Protection From Privacy Breeches
- Chapter 136 – Bargains Over A Cup Of Coffee
- Chapter 135 – Memories Of The Past, Pains Of The Future
- Chapter 134 – More Than One Way To Win A Woman’s Heart
- Chapter 133 – Rougher Side Of The Periphery Life
- Chapter 132 – Troubles And Opportunities
- Chapter 131 – The Unsinkable Suzy Q
- Chapter 130 – Cookin’ With Lasers
- Chapter 129 – The Disposables
- Chapter 128 – Questions? Just Ask Alec! Results May Vary
- Chapter 127 – You Lose Some, You Win Some, Have A Drink And You Will Feel Better
- Chapter 126 – By The Will Of The Light, By The Hand Of John
- Chapter 125 – ♥♥♥ Cloaking His Dagger
- Chapter 124 – A Cup Of Tea
- Chapter 123 – Problems Of People, Politics, And Pelicans
- Chapter 122 – ♥♥ Paradise By The Cockpit Lights
- Chapter 121 – The Duality Of John
- Chapter 120 – ♥ Bittersweet Victories
- Chapter 119 – An Ocean Of Nightmares, An Armful Of Dreams
- Chapter 118 – The Fortunate Son
- Chapter 117 – Eh-ighties Action Star
- Chapter 116 – Wet Towels And Cheap Whiskey
- Chapter 115 – Always Be Discrete In Your Indiscretions
- Chapter 114 – Implied Threats
- Chapter 113 – The Dangers Of Using An Unlicensed Barber
- Chapter 112 – Laughter, Isn’t Always The Best Medicine
- Chapter 111 – To Be A Leader
- Chapter 110 – Prince John, The Man, The Myth, The Legend, The Florida Man
- Chapter 109 – ♥ The Sweet Nothings Of A Strawberry
- Chapter 108 – Blame It On The Wine
- Chapter 107 – The Rage Within
- Chapter 106 – A Harsh Reminder
- Chapter 105 – Walk Softly And Carry A Big Hammer
- Chapter 104 – A, B, C, D, Why Is Alec Messing With Me?
- Chapter 103 – One Hand Giveth, The Other Taketh Away
- Chapter 102 – ♥♥ A Taste Of The Divine
- Chapter 101 – Dancing Amongst The Stars
- Chapter 100 – The Angler VS The Archerfish
- Chapter 99 – Driven Into Darkness
- Chapter 98 – Twin Calamities
- Chapter 97 – John Wayne, The Best Supporting Actor
- Chapter 96 – Delaying The Inevitable
- Chapter 95 – The Black Knight
- Chapter 94 – Tears Of Despair
- Chapter 93 – Nowhere To Go But Up
- Chapter 92 – Lurking Problems
- Chapter 91 – Unraveling World
- Chapter 90 – ♥♥♥ Three’s Company
- Chapter 89 – Arrivals And Departures
- Chapter 88 – Acting On Trust
- Chapter 87 – Meeting Of The Minds
- Chapter 86 – The Burden Of Truth
- Chapter 85 – The Price Of A Friend
- Chapter 84 – An Inconvenient Truth
- Chapter 83 – ♥♥ Naughty Elves Don’t Get To Make Demands
- Chapter 82 – Testing Boundaries
- Chapter 81 – A Test Of Bonds
- Chapter 80 – What About Breakfast At Niki’s
- Chapter 79 – A Master’s Responsibility?
- Chapter 78 – Bread And Circuses
- Chapter 77 – Infinite Frontiers – The Phantom Pain
- Chapter 76 – F-R-I-E-N-D-S
- Chapter 75 – ♥♥ Ruining A Princess
- Chapter 74 – Sibling Sideshow
- Chapter 73 – Burgers, Beings, Bombers, And Broken Noses
- Chapter 72 – Are Elves Bullies Too?
- Chapter 71 – The Six Billion GSC Man
- Chapter 70 – The Black Leather White Knight
- Chapter 69 – Debts
- Chapter 68 – Temptations
- Chapter 67 – A Brief History Of Infinite Frontiers
- Chapter 66 – Lost And Found
- Chapter 65 – Elves Are Cuter When They Are Bullied
- Chapter 64 – No Replacement For Displacement
- Chapter 63 – You Know What They Say About Assumptions?
- Chapter 62 – When In Doubt, Blame The Intern
- Chapter 61 – A 12-Gauge Send Off
- Chapter 60 – ♥♥♥ Playful Punishments With Fantasy Physics
- Chapter 59 – She Is A Good Girl, One Way Or Another
- Chapter 58 – Mother Knows Best
- Chapter 57 – She Is A Real Passenger Princess
- Chapter 56 – Yes, Embrace Your Anger
- Chapter 55 – Daddy Issues? Better Call John
- Chapter 54 – A Wild Pink-Haired Menace Has Appeared
- Chapter 53 – The Wonderful Wizard Of HOTD
- Chapter 52 – A Midnight Dance
- Chapter 51 – ♥♥♥ The Queen Of Awkward Timing
- Chapter 50 – ♥ The More Things Change, The More They Stay The Same
- Chapter 49 – Call Of The Canon
- Chapter 48 – Saved By The GRRRRAAAHHH!!!
- Chapter 47 – How The Turn Tables
- Chapter 46 – The Reality Of Dreams
- Chapter 45 – She Knows My Name
- Chapter 44 – Talk To Me Goose
- Chapter 43 – The Man Who Chose The Bear(folk)
- Chapter 42 – Mostly Harmless
- Chapter 41 – A Relaxing Ride
- Chapter 40 – Duck, Duck, Goose, Owl?
- Chapter 39 – Stirring The Pot
- Chapter 38 – Ones True Nature
- Chapter 37 – What Smells Worse Than Wet Dog?
- Chapter 36 – ♥♥♥ Bunnies Are Still The Best
- Chapter 35 – Five Gals Chatting, Four Contracts Binding, Three Faces Blushing, Two Damsels Dodging, And An Annoyed Paladin In A Pear Tree
- Chapter 34 – Nicknames And Pillow Friends
- Chapter 33 – Medieval Casting Couch
- Chapter 32 – Well, That’s No Ordinary Rabbit!
- Chapter 31 – Revelations
- Chapter 30 – The Start Of A Legend
- Chapter 29 – ♥ Love, War, And Terrible Back Pains
- Chapter 28 – Pains Of The Past, Present, And Future
- Chapter 27 – Promises And Pitfalls
- Chapter 26 – Cruel And Unusual Co-workers
- Chapter 25 – ♥♥ One-Sided Family Planning
- Chapter 24 – The Principle VS The Fallen
- Chapter 23 – The Devil’s Due
- Chapter 22 – The Principal Strikes Back!
- Chapter 21 – Power Of Destruction And Power Naps
- Chapter 20 – Student Council VS Principle Wayne
- Chapter 19 – That Pent Up Aggression Needs An Outlet
- Chapter 18 – Space Aged Tractor Simulator 2000 W/Cat Herding DLC
- Chapter 17 – Not The Cologne I Was Looking For
- Chapter 16 – It’s A Trap!
- Chapter 15 – The Clothes Make The Man
- Chapter 14 – You Can Never Avoid The Bureaucracy
- Chapter 13 – Set For Ludicrous Speed
- Chapter 12 – Consequences Of Drinking The Nectar Of The Gods
- Chapter 11 – Cuddles and Conundrums
- Chapter 10 – ♥♥♥ Bunnies Are Just The Best
- Chapter 9 – The Dangers Of Health Drinks
- Chapter 8 – Deals, Contracts, And Unwise Spending Habits
- Chapter 7 – Day Drinking, The Proper Way To Train Magic
- Chapter 6 – Why Are There Freaking Dinosaurs!
- Chapter 5 – This Show Needs An Epilepsy Warning
- Chapter 4 – No Good Deed Goes Unpunished
- Chapter 3 – Karma vs Canon
- Chapter 2 – Noise Violation Consequences
- Chapter 1 – High School of the Nope
- Prologue – Truck-Kun’s Collateral Damage