Chapter 254: The Death of the Rock Humpers

Jimmy, the QT riders, the archers, and the shooters waited in front of the Arse-crack of the mountain, ready to attack when the enemy poked its head out.

Initially, Jimmy believed that he was done implementing plans, but minutes before the clash, he thought of a couple more of them. Liquid plans, of course.

He did toy with a particular idea earlier on, but he considered it to be risky, because there would be too many people close to the incoming, remaining waves of enemies. However, according to his calculations, too many of the enemies remained from the incoming wave, so he had to implement this plan, which was simple enough; He kept the archers here, instead of sending them home.

He kept them close to the Arse-crack of the Mountain, because if the enemy somehow broke through the wave of plasma bolt attack, the flying archers were to grab the shooters, as many as they could lift, and drag them out of danger.

The QT riders, who were also part of the liquid plan, were to grab the rest of the shooters, and fly them out of danger.

This was the best solution he could think of without getting Rampage involved. He could put all the shooters on top of Rampage’s back, yes, but he feared how he’d react after he heard the wave of plasma bolts. It could be a disaster waiting to happen.

Initially, he also planned to hide the shooters across the mountainside, and have them snipe enemies down from a distance, just like Mika and Eni were, but this came with certain risks. If the enemy was to somehow climb across the high hills, and get to the shooters, they’d be in great danger, especially if they ran out of ammo.

Eni could beam Mika out of trouble, but putting the rest of the shooters somewhere high up in the mountainside was too much of a risk. The guns they handled could force them to lose their footing, not to mention the prior dangers.

Jimmy had to keep his final tactics, and his troops close. He was prepared for disasters, and was anxious enough to predict every possible outcome.

“Why don’t we just give the archers our guns, and have them finish this shit?” Anna asked, introducing yet another plan.

“I thought of that,” Jimmy admitted, “But it wouldn’t work. Believe it or not, we have a better advantage down here from the ground, because the archers would just spam their shots in one spot, and run out of ammo before they even kill half of those fuckers. The guns run out of charge too quickly, it’s a pain in the ass.”

“No kidding,” She held her breath in, “Let’s hope for the best, then. I can tell you for sure that I won’t miss. These hairy bastards are cock-blocking me.”

“Heh, right,” He chuckled, “It’s been a long day for all of us. It feels like we didn’t sleep together for months.”

“Yeah…” She sighed, “Eni told me that… your dick is normal now.”

“Oh?” He cracked his knuckles, though, his entire body felt sore and he couldn’t find much relief no matter what bone he cracked. “Eni was right. You ladies want me to get you all pregnant.”

“I’m not set on it yet, we’ll talk about it.” She followed along, “But I meant that it would be nice to ’sleep together’ without fearing for my life. You’re sure that it works normally now, right?”

“Yup,” He said, “You’re gonna love this, it has something to do with the magical organ inside of us… I’ll tell you about it later. Let’s try not to get distracted. The rock humpers are coming.”

“Rock humpers?” She repeated.

“Yeah,” He chuckled, “Zik is losing his shit. Rock humpers was the least unhinged thing he called our enemy tonight.”

There were plenty of reasons to hate the enemy. The list was long and dramatic, but today, they had the chance to release their frustrations. Now, actually.

The time of reckoning, finally reckoned.

They could hear the enemy, marching close to the Arse-crack of the Mountain, behind the boulders Rampage had been taught to place, to block the path.

A caveman poked his head out, behind the boulder at the far end, and Jimmy saw him, but before he could react, the caveman lost his head, as a single small, blue plasma bolt rained down from the sky, and shaved the caveman’s forehead off.

Eni and Mika, hidden well on top of the hill close to the Arse-crack of the Mountain, already started their attack, as many more concentrated bits of ’hot light’ rained towards the enemy, mowing down at least ten of them in a second.

Thus, the clash, and the final battle between the tribe of the grasslands, and the enemy, officially began.

The shooters, positioned somewhere around one-hundred meters, or around three-hundred feet away from the Arse-crack of the Mountain, unleashed a wave of plasma bolts.

Much like a modern unit from back on earth, they were positioned next to each other, shoulder to shoulder, and they aimed their guns in a single point.

They aimed at the Arse-crack of the Mountain, of course, so they wouldn’t put any of their shots to waste. They didn’t want to miss either, so they refrained from spazzing on the trigger.

The enemy, although at least ten times greater in quantity, were having a hard time climbing past the boulders, the barricade. Only a few of them were climbing over the boulders at a time, and the wave of plasma blasts shot them down before they could even take three steps forward.

The plasma bolts, although colorful, almost like a rainbow, or a bad mushroom trip, were immensely dangerous! The blasts tore through flesh, cooking every chunk of meat they seared into, and those unfortunate souls who were hit with the blast of a plasma cannon, exploded all together.

They could not handle the heat, literally, so their limbs flew around as if they were fragile dolls.

“Be careful!” Jimmy shouted, “Aim better, God damn it!”

The shooters were trying their best, but as they unleashed the waves of plasma bolts, two things happened.

The shooters got either spooked by the continuous whistling hisses of the blasts, or they got excited, and started shooting rapidly, nearly automatically, even though neither one of their guns were automatic.

Both of those issues messed with their aim, and they only managed to fix their aim after Jimmy yelled at them, and after they wasted a third of their ammo.

Jimmy was incredibly nervous, but then again, he was sure that they managed to kill at least fifty cavemen so far. As long as the shooters aimed better, they should have enough ammo to waste the rest of the enemies.

The shooters started aiming better, but this too came with a complication.

When over a hundred bodies piled behind the boulder that acted as a barricade, the remaining enemies used the corpses like a staircase, and easily climbed on top of the barricade, and rushed forward.

Tens of them poured out of the Arse-crack of the Mountain, and although the shooters managed to kill half of these maniacs on the loose, the other half were a much greater problem.

The enemies who survived the waves of plasma bolts, zig-zagged towards the shooters, and everyone else. They were over three-hundred feet away, so essentially, they were hard to hit too.

Jimmy took a moment to look back, and noticed that Gutaxun was getting disgruntled. The other pet dinosaurs especially so, because somehow, every single pet dinosaur they had up here was smart enough to have an ego problem.

“Stay where you are!” Jimmy yelled at the dinosaurs.

He did not want them to rush towards the enemy, because even though he was sure the pets would be able to kill most of them, he was afraid that the shooters would hit one of the pets by accident.

This was a potential disaster that he did not account for until now, and he prayed to whatever God was listening that it would never happen, because he wasn’t sure if he could heal a plasma bolt wound before the dinosaur faded away. The bolts, when met with flesh, were simply too intensive. They were not spears, and they certainly burned a lot hotter than fireballs.

Instead, Jimmy tugged five of the shooters away from the rest, and yelled out, “Shoot at the rogues! Don’t let them get close to us!”

The five shooters listened to what they were told, but they were panicking, so they kept spamming the trigger, missing more than half of their shots. Jimmy had to yell at them again, just to get them to focus, and after that point, their aim improved a little bit.

Afterwards, he jogged towards the rest of the shooters, and yelled out, “Keep aiming at the Arse-crack! We’ll handle the loose ones later!”

Jimmy did not know if he could prevent the potential disaster effectively, but so far, even though this particular, final battle was not going his way, he tried to remain calm, and was happy about the fact that he hadn’t lost a single man or woman yet. His tribe did not suffer casualties, and he intended to keep it that way!

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